To think if a 33 year old has kids

I had my last baby at 26. Im now 40, some if my friends are planning their first child. None of had our children at the wrong age for our own circumstances.

People love to say that but I don't think it's true at all.
Perhaps it's another example of people in London thinking the world revolves around them.

Very often it’s the first post that nails it. This time it’s the second.

I think it's also geographical. In some areas the equivalent to a £1 million London house is around £240'000. The boxes to rent in London is the equivalent cost of our three bed houses. There isn't the need to delay. It also depends on what you mean by prosperous. People earn a lot on here, but don't have the disposable income that a two couple family, in reasonable jobs do, further Up North and they certainly aren't time rich either. They all seem knackered as well.
I was a surprise baby at 40. My Mum was very healthy and lived very well until 86 (born 1928). She wasn't too old. My DD's friend started trying at 29 and at 31, she's having fertility help. Which is a good age, any older and she wouldn't have a good chance of success. If children are important to you, ideally it should be as close to 30 as possible you start trying.

Similar to some London-based PP’s, 33 is on the younger side where I live. My NCT class of 8 was aged 33-39, most parents of kids in DD’s nursery & school class are of a similar age. Research suggests a trend of higher education & career advancement for women = later parenthood. Who can blame them.

I had my son at 35 (3 weeks off my 36th birthday). In an ideal world, I'd have preferred to have had my son earlier in life, but I didn't meet my husband until I was 31 (nearly 32).

No, it's not too old. Your only consideration would be, that if you wanted a second child, you couldn't leave it too late before trying.

There's no guarantee in life that you'll fall pregnant, regardless of age, but obviously the older you are, the chance of you having fertility issues increases.

If you’ve ever met any people you should already know the answer to your poorly worded question.

That poster is literally talking about senior discount and senior mental health which are both very real things. Obviously you don’t get it at 53, so why would you even think that was about you?

Being a grandparent isn’t what makes you senior. Your age is. My Mum was a grandparent at 45.

Well it’s probably less likely but not impossible. Or even unlikely. I had my kids at 37, 39 and now about to have my third at nearly 43.

They won’t be too old, but in my friendship group thirty years ago, it was generally considered that your biological clock started ticking at thirty, and thirty five was considered an older mum by the hospitals.

I do often think having children when you’re younger is probably ‘better’ from the point of view that you’re still fairly young when they leave home. I’ll be in my sixties when mine move out! But it just is; it can’t be helped or changed.

Well I had my first at 32 and second at 42! It’s totally possible to have kids after 33 or 35. Of course there’s more risk of fertility issues especially into your 40s and less time to navigate fertility treatment if needed but I know multiple people who have had babies in their 40s.

Did you just call that poster a thick, poor commoner?

@SoupSoupexcept all my friends from college are degree educated yet we all had dc in our 20’s, affluent London suburb. In fact nearly all my friends from university had kids by 30 too. I think it’s a subset of individuals who seem to think 40+ is the norm. 30 is still average

My mum had her youngest when she was 47. So yes it's possible to have children after the age of 33. Lots of women have children when they are in their forties, although I must say that their energy levels are not what they were when they were in their twenties.

It definitely depends on where you live. I was more a first time grandmother than a first time mum at the age I had my first baby where I grew up, but just totally normal where I live now.

Presumably because of your socio-economic class. More prosperous area, higher levels of education = later having children.

Most people I know wouldn't want to be having kids when they're 40 odd. On here though, everyone seems to have them when they're pushing 50 which I've literally never seen IRL.

Mind your own womb

It wouldn’t have been true in my case.

Women have children well into their 40s so no, 35 isnt too old.

@Goawayimreading yes I think there is a lot of regional/cultural/class variation! My antenatal group was pretty concentrated around 32-36 I'd say (all London professionals).

I think it's one of those things that's hard to study because you can only study it properly once the cohort group has finished, e.g. once they're 45/50+. But the women who are 50 today lived in a different era compared to the ones who are 30 today so it's hard to know how much we can draw conclusions.

I think it's probably true (I have no data just instinct) that out of the 33yos across the UK today who WILL eventually have kids, more of those will have their first child aged 33-35 than 35+ (OP's scenario).

Based my life on that view and I'm happy with the outcome.

As I said, each to their own.

40+ having babies is nuts. Menopause and teenagers don't mix.

I think 35 is pushing it for a first child as it takes a year of trying then waiting for a fertility referral to go through, and by the time you start fertility treatment, you might be 38.

I've had a few friends with fertility issues who left it late. It's not necessarily the drop in fertility/increase in autism/trisomy disorders that bothers me but the lack of time to investigate and treat any fertility issues before fertility really has dropped off.

Does the 33 year old want kids at some point? If yes have they met the right person? financially secure enough to feel ready for kids? Are the ready to settle down?

I dont really think age is the main factor. And having babies after 35 not too old for many people.

If you are talking about yourself then fine but definitely cant apply an age assumption to anyone else.