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AIBU to ask how parents prepare older teens for work?

104 replies

SaveYourself1 · 18/09/2026 19:57

Parents of older teenagers/young adults, how much are you actually doing to help prepare them for work?

I keep seeing parents on LinkedIn trying to help recently graduated children find jobs, alongside all the stories about fewer graduate roles, huge numbers of applications and AI changing entry-level work. Every other day there’s an article once about the jobs market…

For those with children around 16–21, I’m curious how you’re preparing (if at all)?!?!

The grad market seems to be changing so quickly.

OP posts:
LoserWinner · 20/09/2026 13:49

Isn’t part of the problem that many young people (and their parents) won’t even consider low status jobs - pot washing, shelf stacking, cleaning etc at unsocial hours? So many expect to walk straight into a well paid job in a nice office with easy hours. That’s no way to develop a work ethic.

x2boys · 20/09/2026 13:53

LoserWinner · 20/09/2026 13:49

Isn’t part of the problem that many young people (and their parents) won’t even consider low status jobs - pot washing, shelf stacking, cleaning etc at unsocial hours? So many expect to walk straight into a well paid job in a nice office with easy hours. That’s no way to develop a work ethic.

Its exactly the opposite ime too many peole chasing too few jobs at all levels.

Sunbringer · 20/09/2026 13:59

They should already be in work if they are young adults.

Thinkofnewthings · 20/09/2026 13:59

I had no involvement at all, but I did pay for flights when older DD had been offered a job abroad. Younger DD specifically asked me not to get involved when I came up with suggestions. She got sorted very quickly as a TA- nothing to do with her degree, but it was an OK starting point (first class degree, RG university and a masters). Had already been working since she was 16. I had helped when she was that age, creating a CV etc.

dustabsorber · 20/09/2026 14:03

Get them doing jobs around the house/garden to start with. So the concept of doing work is not totally alien to them when they hit their late teens. Force them to get up at a decent hour, so that concept isn't alien to them either.

x2boys · 20/09/2026 14:13

Sunbringer · 20/09/2026 13:59

They should already be in work if they are young adults.

Right
And my son is desperste too work but you cant magic jobs out of thin air
Hes applying for countless jobs and has had just 3 interviews

beaglescurleduplikebagels · 20/09/2026 14:15

SleeplessRoads · 20/09/2026 09:29

I didn’t at all mean to imply that!

Your job is to try your best to turn out a well rounded adult, I was replying to a post that implied a parent didn’t need to prepare a child. You do need to give them all the tools, but they need to choose if to use them.

What I meant was that parents shouldn't be doing anything specific in order to prepare their children for work. The posts on here about parents job-hunting and filling out applications for their adult kids are just insane to me.

GoodGirlFaith · 20/09/2026 14:17

I didn’t need to do anything, my sons both worked from 16 years of age in casual catering employment. Both then had pub jobs around college and now both work full time, one is doing a degree apprenticeship.

MissyB1 · 20/09/2026 14:24

Another one who sent their DC on a Lifeguarding course here. Hes at work at a local gym right now. Hes in A level year this year, he works one or two shifts a week at the gym - shifts are 5 hours, and we won't allow him to do more than two.

dustabsorber · 20/09/2026 14:30

I think all 18 - 25 on UC, should be given some paid work by the state. Surely, we can get them filling in potholes, cleaning up the streets. Anything is better than doing absolutely nothing.

SaveYourself1 · 20/09/2026 14:54

But roles like pot washing etc are being taken up by the robots are they not? Genuine question here

OP posts:
x2boys · 20/09/2026 15:01

dustabsorber · 20/09/2026 14:30

I think all 18 - 25 on UC, should be given some paid work by the state. Surely, we can get them filling in potholes, cleaning up the streets. Anything is better than doing absolutely nothing.

I was watching a world in action documentary last night ftom 1978
About youth unemployment
Things havent changed the issues were exactly he same as they are now

pinkishtongue · 20/09/2026 15:02

I admit, I got offered a weekend job for my then 16 year old by a friend whose partner managed a cafe. She didn’t fancy it much, but I accepted it on her behalf and drove her there every weekend 😂 She stuck it out for a year before applying for a job in clothes retail that she was only considered for because of her experience in the cafe.

I think the most important thing you can do is get them working (anywhere) as soon as they turn 16. Don’t let them be choosy, anything they can get is good experience. Help with cv, offer lifts, send opportunities their way if you see them. Don’t keep financing their lifestyle to the point that they don’t need to earn any money - ours got enough for basics but if they wanted to keep up with the latest fashions/buy expensive make up they had to pay for it.

x2boys · 20/09/2026 15:04

pinkishtongue · 20/09/2026 15:02

I admit, I got offered a weekend job for my then 16 year old by a friend whose partner managed a cafe. She didn’t fancy it much, but I accepted it on her behalf and drove her there every weekend 😂 She stuck it out for a year before applying for a job in clothes retail that she was only considered for because of her experience in the cafe.

I think the most important thing you can do is get them working (anywhere) as soon as they turn 16. Don’t let them be choosy, anything they can get is good experience. Help with cv, offer lifts, send opportunities their way if you see them. Don’t keep financing their lifestyle to the point that they don’t need to earn any money - ours got enough for basics but if they wanted to keep up with the latest fashions/buy expensive make up they had to pay for it.

Thats easier said then done there are far to few of any type of jobs.

Guidanceplease20 · 20/09/2026 15:10

Dishwashers are the only robots doing pot washing where I live and they existed when I was a waitress in the early 80s!

The biggest issue now is insurance and changes in expectation.

I worked in the summer I was 12, so started when I was 11 as a chambermaid. A few friends of mine worked at the same hotel as breakfast waitresses.Views on that have changed significantly.

Also insurance - I doubt you could even get cover now. Probably couldnt then either but it wasnt something anyone thought about.

LydiaJayne · 20/09/2026 15:17

dustabsorber · 20/09/2026 14:03

Get them doing jobs around the house/garden to start with. So the concept of doing work is not totally alien to them when they hit their late teens. Force them to get up at a decent hour, so that concept isn't alien to them either.

I don't agree with that personally, my parents didn't make me and siblings do jobs and none of us did the same with our children, all now passed school and in paid employment

You can model work ethic with your own job, general conversation, expectation that they will get a part time job as soon as possible and making sure they know for darn right sure they will be working adults. I feel sorry for all the young people who don't grow up with those expectations

It is hard out there, having the right approach is a good step on the way and you should use every tool you can to help imo but don't go overboard

BlueMum16 · 20/09/2026 15:18

SaveYourself1 · 20/09/2026 14:54

But roles like pot washing etc are being taken up by the robots are they not? Genuine question here

Someone still has to load and unload the dishwasher. You will find many young people will think menial work like this is beneath them.

A friend's DC quit a coffee shop job as she had to spend the day in the kitchen rather than front of house

LydiaJayne · 20/09/2026 15:19

SaveYourself1 · 20/09/2026 14:54

But roles like pot washing etc are being taken up by the robots are they not? Genuine question here

Dishwashers have existed for decades but in the experience of my children who have worked in pub kitchens not everything can go in them and you need someone to load and unload

Kitchen porter is still a job

MabelMarple · 20/09/2026 15:36

Mine are older now but I encouraged a part time job at 16. Not too many hours to interfere with school but enough to teach some workplace knowledge. One did Kumon maths and the other worked at a local attraction. One did the lifeguarding course but it never led to a job.
When it came to job applications I helped teach them how to build a CV and applications. I made sure they kept their earnings as I didn't reduce their allowance when they got part time work. I enabled it with lifts. One DC worked in a takeaway and it probably cost me more in time and lifts than was worth it but I felt it was important.

Totally disagree about household chores being relevant. I made sure they knew how to cook and clean but never made them do jobs routinely (partly as a result of my own parents making me do too much as a child).

For graduate jobs I would critique applications if asked and mainly provide moral support for the endless rejections or lack of response. They both got there in the end

Sunbringer · 20/09/2026 15:39

dustabsorber · 20/09/2026 14:30

I think all 18 - 25 on UC, should be given some paid work by the state. Surely, we can get them filling in potholes, cleaning up the streets. Anything is better than doing absolutely nothing.

There litter everywhere. They can litter pick. Paint fences. Clean churches. That’s what people doing community service are made to do.

Sunbringer · 20/09/2026 15:41

x2boys · 20/09/2026 14:13

Right
And my son is desperste too work but you cant magic jobs out of thin air
Hes applying for countless jobs and has had just 3 interviews

Then something about his CV isn’t good enough. Look at local temp agencies and get him signed up with them also stewarding jobs (CSP etc).

Minasama · 20/09/2026 15:42

My daughter is 14 and would love a job. It’s much harder than when I was her age and worked Saturdays in the local shop. People don’t often seem to employ 14 year olds nowadays, I believe it’s due to
insurance/liability with minors.

InfoSecInTheCity · 20/09/2026 15:46

My mum got us a weekly paper round that delivered 400 papers and a load of leaflets to the house every week then drove me and my brothers to the delivery area and waited in the car while we did the job, that was when I was 12. The same summer we started fruit picking during the summer holidays, 30p per punnet of strawberries. When I was 15 she helped me write my CV and drove me into town so I could go round the shops and hand it out until I got a weekend job. She also made it abundantly clear that the expectation was that we would all work and support ourselves, she wasn’t mean about it, it was just known that being out of work wasn’t an option and that any job was better than no job.

Telecone · 20/09/2026 15:46

Supermarkets don't employ many under 18's due to much stricter alcohol licensing laws. The youngsters at our waitrose have to call an adult when someone wants to purchase alcohol. No way are the other supermarkets prepared to "waste" time like that.

ToffeePennie · 20/09/2026 15:46

Older teens!! Mine is 12 and already looking for a paper run or something that he can do as soon as he turns 13! He’s already got work experience lined up for himself and will start “volunteering” at a local cafe (in exchange for free milkshakes, cakes and game time) when he turns 14.
Sensibly, by the time you’re 16 these days, you need to have a couple of choices, so my boy is already being proactive.