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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to refuse son a sleepover at a girl's house?

39 replies

Michscoll89 · 18/09/2026 18:31

14 almost 15 year old stepson asked to sleepover at friends house. Husband found out it was a girls house and said he was uncomfortable with it and said no. I agree.

Son obviously fought back on it saying it's completely unfair as is a platonic friendship and pressed pretty hard and asked to stay at his mums house nearby his friends so he could still go out with friends. I believe its a group of them having the sleepover. His mum also didnt understand husbands view on it and has said she has allowed girl stay for sleepovers at their house, and hes been to sleepover at hers before.

Are we being unreasonable thinking it's inappropriate?

OP posts:
SuperSharpShooter · 18/09/2026 19:11

ExtraOnions · 18/09/2026 18:43

A group of them sleeping over, can’t see the harm in it.

If your worry is that they will have sex, they don’t need a sleepover to do that.

This!

We're obvs out of the ordinary (or maybe not so much as the sleepovers are reciprocated 🤷)
We quite often have mixed sleepovers here of 7-8 kids. More the merrier 😅 all bundled up in the front room.
One boy + one girl I'd probs not be so accommodating!

beaglescurleduplikebagels · 18/09/2026 19:10

I can't see an issue with a group sleepover.

stichguru · 18/09/2026 19:06

If it's a group of them I think this is fine.

Favouritefruits · 18/09/2026 19:02

Grumpyoldcat · 18/09/2026 18:48

Risk? A bit extreme. I doubt they will be having an orgy.

Show quote history

All it takes is one child to say ‘they touched me’ or ‘ they said something I felt uncomfortable with’ and then there’s a huge mess. That age group are horny as hell, well I know what me and my friend were like at that age, a lot worse than the boys!

BrickProblems · 18/09/2026 18:54

I think it really depends on the kids. I voted YANBU because if you get a bad vibe about it that’s fine. Having said that we did mixed sex camping at that age and couldn’t have been better behaved. One of the boys’ parents wouldn’t let him come to it as they feared our intentions but none of us would have dreamed of getting up to anything! But we were good kids (at that age anyway!!).

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 18/09/2026 18:49

What exactly is the issue? I had plenty of sleepovers at friends of the opposite sexes house at that age, noone got up to anything dodgy, because we were friends.

Had we actually wanted to get up to anything, there were plenty of other opportunities.

Grumpyoldcat · 18/09/2026 18:48

Favouritefruits · 18/09/2026 18:35

Nah, not worth the risk. You’d kick yourself if something happened!

Risk? A bit extreme. I doubt they will be having an orgy.

Grumpyoldcat · 18/09/2026 18:47

I guess its all down to trust and how well ou know the parents of the girl involved. Probably a bit soon for that kind of get together.

ExtraOnions · 18/09/2026 18:43

A group of them sleeping over, can’t see the harm in it.

If your worry is that they will have sex, they don’t need a sleepover to do that.

BlueMum16 · 18/09/2026 18:42

I guess if they are genuinely friends and separate rooms could be sorted is allow but only with reassurances from girls parent.

I have a DC and DS. DS is only friends with girls.

Backlate · 18/09/2026 18:38

Of course not

but this isn’t your battle to fight

Stompythedinosaur · 18/09/2026 18:37

I consider myself an extremely laid back parent, but not a chance I'd agree to a mixed sex sleepover at that age!

Favouritefruits · 18/09/2026 18:35

Nah, not worth the risk. You’d kick yourself if something happened!

Fidgety31 · 18/09/2026 18:33

14/15 yrs old … can you not remember being that age ?!
let him have some fun !