Is this burn out?

A bit early for menopause; but it does sound like you are doing a lot.

Definitely get blood tests: iron, b12, vitamin D, thyroid, etc.

Did you take any supplements? vitamin D, magnesium glycinate, well woman? excercise?

Probably burnout. It sounds like you took a lot on.

I had it that last year but was building up for awhile. Had to take 5 months of work and find an easier/more relaxed job. It took awhile to get fully recovered. The first few months I didn’t want to do much but sleep, excercise a bit, meditate, read.

I suffered burnout and yours sounds similar - doctor gave me antidepressants but I didn’t take them because I knew I wasn’t depressed - I was just completely worn out.
I started to take better care of myself- nutrients, sleep, exercise and yoga. I tried to cut back on as many things as I could that were causing me stress BUT I honestly believe the best thing by far was learning to meditate daily.
It’s not easy to meditate and I used a CD guided meditation (was a long time ago). It was a bit of trial and error to find a voice and approach that suited me - several didn’t.
Good luck with what works for you.

If your vitamin D is low that can make it hard to sleep.

When I read your list you do a lot for other people - what do you do for you?

Sounds like burn out. It recently dawned on me that this is what's been going on with me. I did way too much for far too long.

I was working, and had umpteen other things I was involved in, including at least half a dozen hobbies I didn't really have time for. I was keeping it all going. My job was becoming increasingly stressful and in the end, I quit and took early retirement. I'd been thinking about it for a while, and absolutely longed to retire so I could do all the things that I wanted to.

That was over four months ago. Since then I have done just about nothing. At night I alternate between sleeping like a log for 12 hours, and being half awake tossing and turning all night. I have no energy to even think about my hobbies, let alone do them. I have to force myself to do the bare minimum of housework and DH is being marvellous about it and has really stepped up.

I feel like I have just shut down. I have no motivation for anything, and can't be bothered to do any of the stuff I wanted to do when I retired. I don't want to talk to anybody. I just want to be left alone and do nothing.

You have described exactly how I was feeling in the 6 months before I finally crashed out of everything and ended up having to leave work altogether.
I had been under serious stress for 5 years, had had a month off work sick due to that but had returned because I was the sole earner.
I thought I had to do everything that was asked of me just to keep the roof over our heads.
It has taken me 10 years to fully recover - nothing is worth such suffering - you are overloaded , start saying No…. please look after yourself first as you don’t get a second chance. Good Luck.

Yes I think it’s burnout. Go on holiday - or have a week off at home on your own and don’t make any arrangements - just potter about, go for walks, have hot baths - do a bit of housework if you want to . . . It will feel odd at first to not be going at full pelt but you will benefit from it.

Do you think the change of season could be a factor even if it hasn't before? All the grey sky, rain and getting dark early is such a big contrast to the summer we had and it is energy sapping. You could well be doing too much (I'm exhausted just reading that list). I feel similar a lot of the time but never really have a chance to just have a few days off and sleep, chill out etc.

You are doing all the stuff a bloke would be doing and being congratulated for but that bloke very likely has a wife at home doing the wife work. Or she got totally fed up and now does the wife work for herself but does 90% of the parenting elsewhere. You are being your own wife.

If you realistically wrote down everything you do and allocated an appropriate amount of time for each (including all the little stuff like shower, shopping list, vacuuming, sleeping, eating), how would your 24 x 7 hours add up? Would they equal 24 or would they add up to more than 24?

Do you earn enough to outsource stuff? Get someone in for a day per week to clean, make beds, do four loads of washing, bring in the shopping delivery and prep a couple of meals?

Great post.