My parents have become insufferable.

110% agree, I am so sorry you're going through this @SparklingTurquoiseOcean and I hope you fina somewhere permanent to live x

Thank you. I think I might be a bit peri as well, just turned 44 x

My mum was 87 when she died. The week before she died she had been teaching English to refugees. My dad was always more right leaning than she was. He came from a solidly middle class family and she from a working class background. He always voted Tory. She always voted Labour.

Although dad always voted Tory he still got on with everyone and would talk to anyone. Some of his views would probably be unacceptable to a lot of people on Mumsnet but I never saw him being unkind or nasty to anyone regardless of who they were.

I am in my early/mid 60s but certainly don't watch GB News. In fact if I could I would love to go travelling, go to gigs (which I do with DD). Mentally I am stil in my 40s. I have always been centre left and feel that everything is so much more polarised these days.

I don't think that you automatically become more right wing when you get older but I think that if people retire and don't have any outside interests other than watching rolling news then of course their world will become smaller and they become entrenched in their views and influenced by what they watch.It is so important to have hobbies or to volunteer when you retire. It is also very important to discuss and challenge views. Not in a patronising way but really trying to understand why someone feels as they do. This type of discussion seems to have been lost.

Sorry. That was a bit of a rant.

I know someone like this who since retirement only watches GB news and old films and has turned from a regular person into someone who compulsively talks about migrants, and I mean a compulsion like we were all at a wedding earlier in the year and he literally interrupted the bride’s mother when she was telling us how thrilled she was (about the day), to talk about refugee access to dentists.

Er... what was so great about life in the 70s and 80s exactly?

Strikes; absolutely shite food; everyone moaning about everything; 3 TV channels; paedophiles hiding in plain sight; sexism; racism; growing gap between rich and poor, north / south divide... Need I go on?

All that was better was that kids played out more and we weren't all glued to screens.

My Dads in his 80s and is like that now, as are the parents of a friend of mine (same age group).

Oh, I feel you, I'm 40! It creeps up on you doesn't it?! Best wishes for finding somewhere permanent ASAP. Life can be so cruel.

They have no need to be people pleasers anymore. They are entitled to their opinion even if it doesnt align with yours.

I think Covid didn’t help, a lot of people that had hobbies or active lives beforehand, didn’t go back to that way of life. Doom and gloom actually become addictive. I think a lot more 40 somethings have become affected too.

You will be. Your energy levels will plummet after menopause and you won't be able to keep up the schedule you did when you were younger. Everyone thinks they won't let age deter them but of course they have no idea what's coming. Stop sneering at your parents and projecting your own values onto them.

Perfectly fine to slag off your parents though.

Oh, the irony, as you like to say.

They spent longer on the planet and remember how things used to be, unless they’re actively going out into the world it’s quite easy to become insular and long for what was.

I think the point is that uni probably provides less in the way of critical thinking than you imagine. Just ask the employers about the calibre of applicants.

They sound lovely 😊

Everyone gets more right wing as they get older. It’s just life. As you get older, you get richer and with life you see too many rip-off merchants, criminals, benefit spoungers fleecing the system whilst you’ve paid in all your life and done the right thing.

Every single person in the UK should be cacking themselves about the 1000 a day illegals invading this country. It’s just ebbing nearer to civil war.

None of that sounds particularly insufferable.
It's always been somewhat de riguer for no view other than that which falls left to be acceptable in polite company, which in itself could be considered insufferable. It's all subjective.

Engage them in chat about other interesting things, and/or tell them you don't care for their politics. Problem solved.

My dad has awful views and he’s fallen down a algorithm rabbit hole, which he acknowledges is impacting his mental health. He is exclusively watching instagram reels before he goes to bed and said the things he watches on immigration, women etc etc make him so angry he goes to sleep ‘biting his pillow’. Sometimes I log in to his instagram and unfollow some of the most extreme pages and follow men’s mental health pages and funny animal profiles.

On the plus side, he doesn’t go on about his views all the time - apart from some snide comments about me being a socialist lol so he’s not as insufferable. But it is horrible seeing it happening and not being able to do anything about it

My dad died seven years ago, aged 71. He was well on the way to being set in this type of thinking - it was very difficult to cope with.
My mother is 75 now and absolutely insufferable - had to take her to the hospital recently and she did nothing but make very loud, unflattering observations about everyone around her - it was so embarrassing. This was by no means an isolated incident. Everything she says is a put down or negative comment - it is exhausting and so toxic…

Of course it’s insufferable to visit your parents to listen to them going on and on and on about things that 1. You don’t agree with 2. You have no interest in and 3. You know is parroted from the news. Regardless of their views, left or right, most people like variety and human connection from their family, not a constant rundown of GB News daily highlights. No one likes a bore, it makes it worse when you feel their bigoted but any side of the political spectrum can be insufferable if they keep going on about it when no one else is interested

Something

Posted too soon. Something happens with age. My DGMIL was a nightmare when she got to her 80s. Constantly pointing out fat people, ugly people, hair she didn’t like…

Thank you for your kindness x

My parents are early 70s and the same. I don’t remember them being as awful as this. GB news obsessed. I can’t be bothered to argue with it anymore, I just avoid conversations about it all, no matter what I say it won’t change their views.

I've really touched a nerve with you. You're coming for every comment.

I'm guessing you watch GB news and think Nigel Farage will save the world and are scared that someone in a small boat might steal your cup of tea.

Have you investigated whether she has a hearing problem?

If you read my earlier posts, I was actually talking about education in general - not just Uni.

As part of history (all through secondary school) I was always taught to consider who created the sources we were discussing or studying, and why they might want to push a certain agenda, and whether we could trust the source and if not why not.

I don't think academia or education is the be all and end all of critical thinking but if you've not studied these things because you weren't ever taught them then how would you know what sources of news had your best interests at heart or not?

My parents did not do A Levels, have a couple of (low grade) O Levels between them and didn't go onto any further education.

Note: let's not demonise those who think education is a good thing. One thing the right especially love to push back against is education. A very dangerous game.