To be shocked at ‘school readiness’

I'm not going to dig out a stat but there are certainly a lot of parents at my kids' school who would have been teen parents

Gentle parenting is not new at all, it's not permissive parenting, it's just not seeing your children as your adversaries and you are not indoctrinating your children with formal methods of teaching and strictness. Traditional and strict approaches to raising children do not encourage intellectual curiosity, problem solving skills, increases stress and anxiety, none of which are conducive to cognitive development and high academic attainment, something a country desperately needs for economic growth.

Yes that sounds like OP is straight up lying. It's statistically impossible that 90% of non-SEN children do not respond to their own name.

The OP is just trying to start a rage-bait thread based on a few observations that may apply to 20-30% of children (which is a lot, but nowhere close to the 90% they're claiming)

I totally believe this as I have grandchildren and see the difference between them and how my children were at the same age. One grandchild was potty trained by just swapping the nappy for pants. No encouragement, not asked regularly if they needed the potty etc. Unable to use a knife and fork, but could work an iPad and mobile phone better than me. Some parents can't be bothered and sit their child in front of a screen all day so they can do the same.

But some of us do and aren't seeing it. So what's happening that it's so prevalent in some areas but not in others? It doesn't appear to be class related, it's unlikely all the permissive parents are clustered to certain areas. It would be interesting to know if the majority of these children are at home with parents/in childcare all day before starting school. As another poster pointed out, a lot of parents both work now so the child is in nursery for long hours where one would assume the skills are being taught even if parents aren't doing it. Even those that don't work usually have their child in preschool/nursery for a few hours, again where these skills would get taught.

YANBU, though I think it’s dependent on where you live; it’s not like that at my DC’s primary school.

Lazy parents raising their children on iPads, expecting the nursery to teach them everything, and, frankly, importing significant numbers of people in to our country who don’t have basic skills or speak English is a recipe for disaster.

But surely most children go to nursery or preschool nowadays? Don’t they learn these skills there?

Oh there has been a few blame teen parent comments on here already? Damn these threads go the same every year. Teen pregnancy has decreased hugely in the last few decades and yet this school readiness problem gets worse every year?
Had mine at 16 and 18 and they both could read before all their classmates and were out of nappies at 2

Well, it's just not backed up by the data, teenage pregnancies as the rate if teenage pregnancies has decreased by 70% since 1998. Again, the good old days had a high percentage of teenage pregnancies!

That does not work in mainstream. Mainstream squashes individuality. They don’t have the time or interest to indulge children without formal methods of teaching and strictness. Having a classroom of 25 children when many have been taught to express themselves, reject traditional teaching, is not an easy task.
Nowadays schools are providing breakfast and dinner, pencils, books, next they’ll be dropping in to put the children to bed.

Yeah sure, do you believe everything you read on the internet?

If you read the OP posts they say it's written name not called out.

Exactly! Every year we have these threads and someone will blame an increasing number of teen parents, seemingly unaware that there are less teen parents than ever before

If it has changed, the main difference between now and the past is that children go to nursery a lot more now and it is much more common for both parents to work. I guess it is tricky to squeeze in so much parenting when you add a full time job into the daily routine.

Don’t help with thir coats. They’ll learn from each other unless they’ve extra needs.

I honestly think we need to bring back shame as a society.

Had my kids at 16 and 18 and they could read before all their classmates. Did you know there are less teen pregnancies than ever before? Maybe it’s the older parents who aren’t parenting as well as they should be

22 years ago when my eldest started primary, we were sent a list of things that would help him settle in.
Most of them were being done at home and at montessori.

The coat on and off at home, being hung up at home and school.
Taking out his lunch box, putting it back in his bag.
Obviously he was supposed to be fully trained and used to wiping himself.

Also used to following directions from the teacher, listening etc.
These were taught at school from day one.
The first thing she taught them was the fingers to the lips for silence.
She did it, and they followed.
Name tags on everything so that he could keep his stuff together.
She was an amazing teacher.

When as parents we brought the children to the classroom, we supervised them hanging their coat in their named spot.

At home my children would love to dump bags, coats and shoes everywhere.
I would call them back down to put them away.
Self interest taught them to do it.
They didn't want to be called repeatedly to pick them up.

These things take time and effort.
With both parents working long hours it can be easier to do things than be arguing the point.

I get that. But I think it must add to the teachers load.
Particularly as so many reception children aren't fully trained apparently.

My niece is a primary teacher and her school sent out a letter last april to all incoming childrens parents that unfortunately she would not be involved in toileting for the children in September, and children having any issues would have parents called in to sort their children out.
The children needed to be fully trained.

It was reiterated again on the first
They are sticking to it her mother told me as last year was absolutely ridiculous.
She had 26 children and half needed bums wiping every other day.

Not the teachers job IMO.

Sorry but why are we blaming teenagers having children? If anything, they are much more likely to have wider family to support them.

More outdated crap thrown at young parents without evidence.

Teen and young adults are a tiny proportion of all parents, they are not responsible.

And didn’t op clarify she’s in a more middle class area, where she’s seeing 90% of children are not school ready?

What doesn't work in 'mainstream' - facilitating imaginary play? Imagination is pretty crucial for cognitive development- problem solving skills, executive function skills, working memory....

I was in a mainstream school it worked for me, wasn't disruptive, was quiet and hardworking. My children were equally in a mainstream where there were no issues, in fact, Parents Evening always getting praised by teachers for their exceptionally good behaviour. Oh and outstanding academic achievements!

Yes, the fabric of society is fraying and things are different now, including expectations. But I'm not bloody interested in sitting here judging for laziness, deprivation, gentle parenting, or what have you. I want action taken. More community centres. More early childhood education/options. Places where screens aren't allowed, or at least not overt.

I hate permissive and lazy parenting but I also understand that we have to coexist among the children they produce, so we might as well vote to spend a bit more money up front on places like SureStart than spending a great deal more money down the line fixing set-in problems.

SEND is more likely with older parents as well.

Where the heck are you in the UK? Are you in the UK?