Was I in the wrong or was DSis being a bridezilla?

This - the bm had no filter and obviously no class perhaps your Dsis should choose better instead of being annoyed at you.

Oh well. What's done is done i guess. Bet the oldies loved that 🥰. Probably swinging from the light shades when the got back to the room....new lease of life and all that 🤭🤫

Given the update about the content of the conversation, I am not surprised you said something. She sounds gross.
Your sister is being overdramatic.

That is kind of conversation that would keep me interested in! YWBU - it’s not your place.

Yuck. I’d probably not have said anything but do agree with you and I’d have felt really awkward and uncomfortable. But wtf is your sister so bothered?

I think it was disrespectful of the bridesmaid to blast her sex life in anyone’s earshot old or not. And no I’m not a fuddy-duddy.

I wouldnt have said something I don't see any need to do this offended on peoples behalf thing if they had a problem they could have spoken for themselves

Exactly this. So many people here desperate to demonstrate their superior levels of ‘open mindedness’ and ‘progressiveness’ but really it’s just condoning rude and totally inappropriate behaviour.

There’s something a bit sad and attention seeking about having such a conversation in front of an audience. I imagine the older family members would rather not have had such sordid behaviour paraded at an otherwise nice family celebration. It’s not a good look.

Bridezilla

Whatever happened to decorum?

I wouldn't want to listen to that trollop boasting about her sexual encounters at a pre-wedding dinner either.

You must be joking. Personally I wouldn't find that conversation remotely erotic, the opposite in fact.

Yes it is laughable the way people on here seem to think any of this would be a revelation to today's pensioners. We weren't born in the 1930s, we all grew up in the 1960s, the era of free love, drugs and rock n roll.

Don't you just love the younger generation who think once people get past a certain age they need to be spoken about like they can't think for themselves and are spoken about like they are not in the room

Don’t like calling MN double standard but I think that had it been the best man with a similar tale of explicit detail the responses would very much favour Op intervention.

I purposely didn’t invite my merchant navy school friend as he is not able to rein it in even when told. At least the BM was crass but not so much as to not regulate her self.

The sister should be grateful she was looking out for everyone at her wedding

Team Dsis all the way. The only reason you should have ever said something was if your sister had an issue otherwise stay out of it. Also didn’t realise people weren’t allowed to partake in sexual conversations when they reach a certain age, my mum and gran are usually the ones that need reined it 😂.
Although if her bridesmaid had an issue then she should have addressed it there or the day after. Not bring it to your sister just before her wedding day. But yeah stop policing other adults conversations.

Today's generation would blush with the antics of the 60's and 70's . I know I am very liberated in my thinking and speech and I'm 76 .

It depends how you said things and what you said. If it’s was said in a warm kind way and was delivered as gentle guidance by someone concerned for their old relatives, than fine. Anything delivered remotely teacher like would be high and mighty and would just get everyone’s backs up.

This isn’t a situation about being right or wrong it’s about impact. Your sister feels upset. It was her wedding so to smooth it over eat humble pie 🥧 and say sorry, you thought you were doing the right thing at the time and didn’t mean to upset her.

I think you’ve missed the point. Of course anal sex is not appropriate dinner conversation. However drinking a little too much and behaving inappropriately at weddings is as old as time and OP policing people’s conversations, judging them and berating guests is also unacceptable as demonstrated by her sister’s response who was the bride.
As it happens I am elderly and would come across as a prim old lady and would have had a giggle at overhearing the conversation.

Did you tell her what was said ? I’m surprised if you told her she thought that’s ok to share such a story.Both tramps ! I feel bad for the second chap,that’s nasty 🤮

I'd not have said anything.

People dont die from over hearing about her sex life. I would of course never say this myself but she is letting herself down - I wouldn’t have intervened. You don’t need to police people - others can move away if they need to.

Your sister Is being a bit strange though - is anal sex lady a bit too cool for school and does your sister look up to her. I’d ignore - it’ll blow over. If she mentions it again just say well I did it with the best intentions aunt Mabel doesn’t seem as though she’d enjoy hearing about anal sex while tucking into her pasta but I guess you can never tell.

OP was completely out of order.

You know what's a worse character trait than getting drunk and regaling your friends with a TMI anecdote? Being the kind of person who thinks they're in charge of monitoring and policing other people's conversations, and who watch/listen/judge everyone around them for perceived infractions of what they deem Appropriate.

You are not her mother and she is not a child - you do not have any authority over another adult and you do not get to scold them.

OP was not part of the conversation (she was eavesdropping, which is rude in itself). Neither were the old people around her, not that any of them complained in any case. The conversation was not harming anyone - there was no bitching, no gossip, no slurs. All she should have done, if she didn't like what she heard, was roll her eyes internally and return her attention to her own conversation. (Was no one talking to you OP?) Following someone into the loos to tell them off is deranged behaviour.

Your sister isn't unreasonable at all. She's probably mortified that her prudish, busybody sister insulted one of her closest friends. I'm guessing this isn't the first time OP has done something like this so it's likely that she's also thinking "god, my sister really is a twat" and lowering contact accordingly.

Can't you see the irony of giving a patronising telling-off to a close friend of the bride, but being offended because said bride is replying to tell you that you were out of order 😂

And then calling your sister " a bridezilla". She has no choice but inviting you to the wedding, but she must be wishing you had been unable to attend

That's not appropriate conversation at an event full stop, however old the guests are, so YANBU at all