Was I in the wrong or was DSis being a bridezilla?

People often seem to forget that a lot of us olds were wild young things in the swinging sixties, and have remained broad-minded and open about sex.

This.

Also, it takes aging to realise that the body may grow old, but the mind does not.
I get quite taken aback when people treat me like a senior; inside I am still a young woman. 😊

I think it's funny when tradesmen etc swear because something's not going well, and then apologise.

My poor plumber had awful trouble plumbing in my new bath, called it "a cunt of thing" within my earshot, apologised and then roared with laughter when I said "No need to apologise, it's one of my favourite swearwords."

😂 she sounds like someone I used to work with - sticky Vicky!

Was she a friend of Skidmark Lil?
I swear when I was young there was a stripper in town who had that nickname.

possibly, but I swear I didn’t work with her at the strip club! 😂

Clearly it was thankless interfering and probably you would have been better off allowing your sister's low class friend reflect poorly on her and her wedding.

That your sister would be happy with such conversation being inflicted on her elderly relatives speaks volumes about her.

Let her off.

I don’t think you were unreasonable, there’s a time and a place for that sort of chat and a family wedding isn’t one of them. If it was being discussed openly in a workplace it could potentially be regarded as sexual harassment so why should you and your family have to suffer it.

Sums it up. Who made you moderator of the conversations? Your sis is as much a drama queen as you, lol.

YANBU. I get why you said something to the bridesmaid and I probably would have too, but when your DSis told you she didn't appreciate it I think it would have been better to just apologise instead of trying to defend yourself. It's DSis's wedding, her friend and her relationships with family that it impacts (even if Aunt Delilah and Grandma Dorthy who overheard are your aunt and grandma too).

Your DSis sounds like she was just looking for an excuse to be off with you, though.

If it had been a hen do.. I'd kind of expect to hear things like this.. At a welcome dinner for a wedding? Definitely not. YANBU

Just to let you know older people also have sex.
They're unlikely to tell random dinner guests at the the dinner table about it... anal or otherwise... because they have more class.

Creepy as hell following someone to the loo to tell them to stop their conversation

You sound insane

A BDSM concept is that consent includes the consent of the audience. There's a limit about how much sexual conversation the staff working at the place should be expected to tolerate remembering they're at work and can't just leave (unlike elderly family members). Different workplaces will have different expectations and I expect places catering for pre wedding dinners are used to a certain level of explicit conversation but if they're using waiting staff under 18 you need to keep the conversations out of that topic.

I'm an older adult, 72, and nothing you've reported as being said would have shocked me.
And as for the poster who is 50ish and thinks anyone older would never have heard of anal sex, words fail me.
I was a young adult in the late 60s/early 70s. I guess, from the comments, you'd have been shocked by what we said and did then.

It's nothing to do with the age of anyone in earshot. It's common politeness and decency not to speak like this in any company where you don't know for sure that everyone is on board with this sort of discussion. And least of all a pre wedding celebration. She was incredibly uncouth, got called out in it (politely and away from the crowd) and has gone complaining to the bride. Yuk.

Who are you to be policing other people’s conversations? I’m an old person and I love other people’s naughty chatter and I have truly seen and heard it all before! Judging, censoring and lecturing are very unattractive traits.

I would have probably said ‘ can you repeat that a bit louder, I don’t think the guests on the next table heard about your sex life.’
Your dsis has some pretty gross friends imo. There’s a time and a place.

I'm not surprised you said something then. That's totally inappropriate, how embarrassing.

I'm also older and while I wouldn't be "shocked" I would find it pretty gross and hardly something to brag about at an event like that.

It's happened. You cant change it. Don't give it another thought. If your sister continues to refer to it just tell her you felt references to anal sex and shagging are not appropriate where you are not all close friends and tell her to leave it there

I think you did right.. the bridesmaid obviously went straight back to your sister and told her.. anal sex going down on her no need to shout it for all ears I agree with you .. id tell your sister the context of it.

Gross convo especially at a wedding but I don’t think I would have followed her. I might have made a jokey comment there and then like - time and place guys!

or pulled a face and moved away and avoided her!

I think bride is being over dramatic though.

I mean personally, I wouldn’t have pulled her to one-side.

I’d have either told my sister about the comments she was making and let her deal with it directly if she felt it was necessary.

Or, I’d have left her to it and if your family members were offended I’d have let them complain to the bride themselves.

If it was my prewedding id have been grateful of your intervention!

I think in particular that second story is particularly vile - withholding info that may have impacted coworker2s consent is horrible.