To ask for advice re private school dispute

Could you find me a court case like this please? Happily one in which a parent has been ordered to pay 50% of private fees before the child has started school
Read my post again! I never said that OP would absolutely be ordered to pay. YOU said it wouldn't even make it to court, or that the child wishes wouldn't be heard. Both incorrect statements.

Dont engage, dont go to open dats, soeak with yoyr son and maje it clear you can not afford to pay half and he will therefore not be able to attend private school ... unless somebody else thinks it is so important they want and will pay.

If you go you open a door. You shouldn't do that if you can't or won't pay the fees.

You need to stay calm and book on to the state school open days and talk to her about those. Talk clearly to her about the risks of going for private school - you can’t afford it, and if her dad stops paying she risks having to leave her school fiends and start somewhere else. I would say you don’t understand why her dad is pushing for private school when you have made it clear that you can’t afford to contribute and he can’t pay it all. Tell her that it doesn’t make any sense. What you want for her is a good school in your area where she will have lots of friends.

She might work it out for herself that he is just doing this to cause trouble.

But you were giving her information that wasn't relevant to her circumstances.

I'd go to the open days so you can say if useful that you were not closed-minded. I would also tell ex-DH in writing that if he is insistent DD goes to private school, he will have to pay as you have no money for this and have prioritised DD's education through your house purchase.

If the majority of DD's friends go to the Ofsted Outstanding state school, DD is likely to want to go too. I would bide my time and let ex-DHvrun with his PR campaign.

But not a case like OPs.

Could you find me a court case like this please? Happily one in which a parent has been ordered to pay 50% of private fees before the child has started school.

I have professional experience to say that it would absolutely be heard in court. Someone has already posted an example. Dad had to pay the full costs, but it was absolutely considered and private school prevailed.

@BlumeUndTisch, you don't sound like you have any experience of the family court.

The dad could make an application. They could be told to go to mediation first, but if they don't reach a resolution in mediation, they would absolutely be heard in court.

This wouldn’t get to court.

But this wouldn't never be an issue for a judge would it?

Does courts spend time on a matter like this? I would be surprised.

This wouldn’t even make it in front of a court.

A solicitor would soon tell OPs ex they were wasting their time.

He’s just as entitled as you are to have an opinion on what is the best school for your child. However, if he wants private & you don’t, then he has to be willing to pay the full amount. There’s no way a court would force you into this.

Id go to the open days though, because a) you may like it and b) if he is willing to fund the full amount, you still need to be involved in your child’s education.

Would a dispute between parents like this at all be able to go in front of a judge? I would be very surprised.

No court will engage in a child's voice about private school because mum refuses to pay 50% of the fee
This is totally incorrect. The judge would be breaking the law if they were not willing to hear the child wishes.

@Fattypantss, you seem to struggle to distinguish between hearing the child and imposing their wishes.

The judge can recognise their wishes but rule that it is not possible for these to be met.

That's different to saying the court will have no interest in hearing their wishes.

In this case, there could be different rulings, that the dad pays 100% or OP has to pay a percentage, or the judge can decide that although it is the wish of the child, it just can't be afforded and the local school is good enough.

No court will engage in a child's voice about private school because mum refuses to pay 50% of the fee.

No court will engage with the matter. You can't go to court and get a order for mum to pay 50% because dad wants private education but won't pay the fees. It's not a court matter.

Why that faff? Just say no won't pay and be firm.

@BlumeUndTisch said that the court court have an interest in the child's opinion. This is absolutely incorrect.

That is different to saying the judge will impose OP to pay. Sometimes it is indeed not possible, but the child wishes will be considered.

Okay, so OPs daughter whines and cries and says I really, really want to go to the private school that daddy showed me, he says that awful mummy won’t pay half.

The court says, “yes child, it is your right to go to the private school!”

What does the court tell OP to do? Buy a magic money tree, or sell some organs?

Agree you should attend open days

My thought is that you could write to each school under consideration and explain the situation and that you are unable and unwilling to pay half their fees.
Schools would definitely care about the bottom line.

@Fattypantss, you are wrong, the court have statutory duty to listen to the child wishes.
Under Section 1(3) of the Children Act 1989 in England and Wales, the family court has a statutory duty to have regard to the ascertainable wishes and feelings of the child concerned, considered in light of their age and understanding. [1] (www.nuffieldfjo.org.uk/resource/uncovering-private-family-law-how-often-do-we-hear-the-voice-of-the-child)

A child goes to state school if parents can't or won't pay for private education.
The child's opinion won't make any difference what so ever.

I would 100% send to private school over state any day of the week BUT thst comes down to affordability

if your ex won’t fund 100% if it and you can’t afford it then it’s not an option. It’s that simple