AIBU to feel middle-class luxuries have become increasingly out of reach?

I agree. We forget that lots of things we take for granted now weren't even available back then. If we gave up our mobile phones, internet, car, takeaways etc we'd have more disposable income, but we've grown to expect all those modern conveniences. They all cost money.

yeah, nobody ever bought random small luxuries before 2010 🙄

25/50 years ago far more people smoked, there were 111 pubs per 100,000 people (now there are less than 58 per 100,000), in the 1940s the average person went to the cinema 33 times a year, in 1974 alone 109 million albums were sold on record.

Before online shopping people bought things from catalogues and door to door salesman, betting was on the dogs/horses/pools lottery rather than online gambling. Buying things on tick was common before credit cards.

People only didn't buy new iphones 20/30/50 years ago because they didn't exist, not because they were more financially prudent!

There have always been savers and spenders, the only difference is what people buy.

@latetothefisting I agree. You are right. There have always been spenders and savers. There have always been choices about what to spend money on. There are always things we regard as expensive luxuries and things we see as necessities.

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope he had life insurance or a death in service payment.

Are you in the uk? Are you eligible for Bereavement Benefit?
https://www.gov.uk/bereavement-support-payment

@cocobow
I often wonder how, the people that i know who live their lives with all the trimmings somehow manage to do it 🤔!

@Thegirlwhowent @latetothefisting Mobile phones can't really be classed as a luxury when not having one locks you out of a lot of everyday life. A car is a grey area. Yes, many who have them don't need them, but cars are sometimes the only way of getting to work. Takeaways are of course a luxury, but the OP's point is that it's a stretch for many to afford even discretionary spending on modest treats like coffee and cakes, never mind restaurant meals and takeaways. So to say you'd have disposable money if you didn't have takeaways is circular. Takeaway money IS disposable money, and those who have takeaways aren't stretched and aren't the focus of the original posting.

My mum did! Actually, she didn't need to but she hated shopping - and especially clothes shopping. She also hated spending money. She made her own clothes, cut her own hair, never ate out. Her only treats were the occasional jigsaw. Even so, I think she was just as happy as anyone else. It depends what gives you pleasure.

TBH, I find being deprived of little things more upsetting than bigger ones. I can happily forego a holiday but wouldn't like to miss a picnic/countyside day, same with restuarant verses coffee shop. I still get a thrill from buying a 'new' book even if it's from a charity shop!
When I'm on a budget I seem to need a treat more so try to come up with alternative 'feel goods' like the flask coffee & charity shop book.
I think it's actually easier to budget 'hardcore' when you factor in a treat, keeps the morale up, instead of feeling low & buying something unplanned to cheer one's self!
Then feeling guilty as well as low.....

At no point have I said mobile phones are classed as a luxury?

I do think that there's a big difference between a mid range, out of contract or second hand smartphone that works perfectly well and does everything you need for 'everyday life' (cost, about £5 a month on giff gaff or similar) is very different to buying the newest iphone at £45 a month, though. One is clearly a luxury - you might not be able to buy a house with the difference but £500 extra a year in savings will be a very good starter!

I think mobile phones are a bit of a red herring. I am SIM only but they have built-in obsolescence (Apple are the worst for this). Most phone contracts now are three years and by the end of that the battery holds a charge for about half a day. You can't replace them on a market stall any more either.

Back in 2006 when I worked for PC World you had to buy your own broadband router too for £59.99, pay for a BT landline, and many many people were on PAYG spending the equivalent of a lot more than £30pm is today on per-minute calls and 10p texts. My contract until recently for a Google Pixel was £31pcm.

Yes apple are horrendous. I've recently had to stop using my ipod.

I totally agree. It cost £100 easily for a meal for 2 - at my local pub! Sowe just stopped doing it. I’m on a decent wage and I have to be very cautious with my outgoings. It must be so soul destroying if you have a fixed income / minimum wage.

everything is increasing in price so fast it’s just not sustainable. It’s no wonder that restaurants and pubs are closing down - who has that sort of disposable income?!

and food prices are just ridiculous

I won't buy Apple products partly for that reason.

@cocobow It really wasn't nice fabric! She'd buy the cheapest stuff off the market. Her dresses were all the same style, summer and winter. She really wasn't interested in clothes, makeup or appearance. Her main passion was maths.

This.

Years ago people saved, why do some posters make it sound like everyone frittered money away like it was nothing. People really didn't.

People tgat chuck money around often have debts, credit cards etc and have little real wealth

I don't know why you're trying to tell me what my mother was like! I'm not putting her down. I admired her eccentricity. I think she'd have been horrified if anyone thought she had indulgences of any sort!

I think there was a spell - say 1998 to 2008 when there was an explosion in young families having way more spare cash than any generation previously and they drove things - normalising daily take away coffees , weekly meals out, new outfits, holiday day trips that involved paying for something

and many kids growing up in those homes are now looking around and seeing they can’t do that - what they don’t realise is that they are the unusual ones. Their childhoods were materially wealthy compared to all
previous generations

sinve perhaps about 2008 , and certainly over the last 10 years , things have gone backwards for most people in terms of spare cash. But if the “extravagant” decade passed you by ( your habits were already formed ) then you don’t see things as abnormal- you see the expectations - weekly take aways for example - as strange instead

I think people consume a lot more now. In the 1980s the average woman bought 12 new clothing items a year. Now, the average woman buys around 64 new clothing items a year.

While it’s true that wages haven’t kept up with inflation, it’s also the case that people have become greedy and expect too much.

12? Really? This year so far, 4 items of clothing and 2 pairs of shoes. And I consider that a spending spree. Each to their own though - I'm quite spendthrift in other ways.

I was just reading something about how much clothing we buy nowadays - it wasn't exactly what you said but it wasn't far off. There is more cheap clothing around (Shein, Primark etc) but we also don't keep things for so long and we wear things fewer times (or not at all!) Of course, we're constantly encouraged to buy more because somebody is making a profit from it but it's not good for the planet.