Dd, boyfriend and flat purchase

If she is bettet off because of the arrangement she can save the difference in a LISA. Hopefully, if things progress she will have a long and happy marriage but if her name is not on the deeds, and particularly if she is asked to sign an agreement voiding any claim on his property should they divorce, she should ensure she can be financially independent. A LISA is a sensible step at this point.

You should share your experience with her if she resists advice to have a safety net saving plan.

This seems very lopsided.
I don’t think she should be paying him rent and lining his pockets, particularly when it’s his parents that have bought the flat.

The buy-to-let would be a very good option, because then they would both be on an even keel and she wouldn’t be the underdog.

As always MN throws up a range of answers, where the differences depend on assumptions outside what has been covered in the posts

For me, the major difference is between on the one hand, two adults each making their way in the world and on the other , a family where at least one of the adults earning capacity is impacted by motherhood

Before having children, each should be roughly making their own way, responsible for their own costs. Once children become a reality, then it’s only fair that the costs including conceiving and carrying children, impact on career as well as the financials of living expenses should be divided fairly.

My earnest desire for your daughter, and for all women, is that they make an informed choice before moving from one state into the other. Ideally with the legal protections of marriage and certainly not just drifting into adding children into the mix while continuing to share financial costs as well as mothering and parenting.

So she needs to take the opportunity that this is to save as much as possible to get on the housing ladder, if that's what you want. However, I think you need to seriously consider whether a buy to let is what she wants. Successive changes to tax treatment have meant they aren't the investment they once were. She may be much better off simply saving in the stock market linked investment to gain growth over time. I would recommend joining the Rebel Finance group on Facebook and potentially (both of you, you and your daughter) doing the course (free), particularly as you've said elsewhere you don't know what a LISA is. From reading your subsequent posts, I think you own experiences are rightly making you cautious, however protecting your daughter's long-term financial interests can be done in more than one way. You have to helicopter up and see that your daughter living in a nicer flat, in a nicer area, than she could otherwise afford (even jointly with her boyfriend who you like) is a good thing and any consequences on the life path you thought she might take can be handled separately.

Best she does it this way. If they get engaged then married then I guess she would have claim if something went wrong in the future. However if they split up before being married it wont be a case of untangling finances and property.

Edited because I only read half of the updates like an idiot. Another vote for a buy to let here though.

Also I wouldn’t necessarily prioritise a buy-to-let. Talk to a financial advisor but investments generally perform better than property these days and come with way less hassle

Sounds ideal. They dont need to be tangled in a joint purchase like that unmarried but if they marry id suggest she buy into the property and be added to deeds.no rush.

No, he's entitled to buy something on his own. Your daughter can do the same.

Not a good idea.

What would your opinion be if it was the other way around? Of course the assets would be 50/50 should they marry. It’s really upto your DD to decide, but no one lives anywhere for free. What is stopping her buying her own property that she could rent out if she doesn’t want to live there?

I understand your concern but am wondering how old she is? For context, most women I know didn’t buy until they were early 30’s after at least 5 years of saving. There seems to be an expectation that young people need to urgently ‘get on the property ladder’ but its never been the case that buying under 30 is the norm. I think she is in a great position compared to many by the sounds of it. I would encourage her to crack on with saving up rather than rushing to buy then she is in a good position whatever happens in the next few years.

If she is being asked to sign a prenup, then unless that becomes null and void once they are married AND have children,
she would be spectacularly silly to have children with him.
Women take the hit with salary, career and pension, invariably once they have children.

No way would I be not having a huge conversation with her about this.

So many threads on MN, where once clever women were totally screwed by having children and 100% taking the financial hit.

Have that conversation before she marries him.
Spell it out to her.
This is not the time to be delicate.

Pre-nups aren't legally enforceable in the UK, but regardless she needs a good chat with a solicitor and financial advisor.

If there is going to be a prenup eventually she should present hers to him first

What does you daughter think? There's nothing stopping you giving your daughter a deposit if she wants to buy somewhere as her own place and can afford to do so , but it sounds like she prefers to rent at this point in her life

It seems entirely possible that your daughter might prefer to buy a bigger place together when they are married. You can help with that if and when they do. Maybe she will need help matching his equity at that time.

Tell her to put a lot of what she’s saving on rent into her pension.