AIBU to feel fed up about how much summer holidays cost?

If you want to take it like that, then do so. It really wasn’t, as I clarified in my reply I meant the odd word and more looking through the pictures that’s why I put reading in inverted comments because most 5 year olds are at the early stages (mine were included in that).

Buy ice creams when you want, buy lunch out continually, keep spending, I am just trying to point out that getting into that habit now is so much harder to reverse when they’re older and can reason with you better. I have a friend who is a great mum but will tell me her children constantly demand ice creams, drinks, treats and she’s overwhelmed and it’s expensive for her but that’s what they’re used to, it’s not even a treat to them, it’s the standard they are used to.

That’s not me thinking I’m superior that’s me commenting on your thread telling you to rein it back in now whilst you can but you seem to want to engage with those who agree with you.

Well my son definitely eats a lot of ice cream

Well you have a week or less to go so next year hopefully will be easier

half term lots of Halloween stuff usually going on

make plans now to see friends in Oct

dh Can maybe take some holiday days next summer

See I am in the disagree camp!
Mine need taking out for the day to avoid screens. We exhausted NT when they were little so that fills them with dread.
Yes we will do walks etc but it isn't as easy to coax them along with a nature hunt or lets feed the ducks like we could when little.
Things like baking take an hour max. They read before bed, again an hour max.
To mine relaxing for my son is playing games and chatting to friends online.

When they were younger I felt we had it sussed and I could 'timetable' the week doing things people keep suggesting to the OP. Now those things don't exist.
Also some activities are so short lived they aren't worth it e.g. the latest point people suggesting the library reading challenge. Mine are doing it but to choose some books takes no time at all, and as already mentioned the library no longer do the activities they used to so a visit is literally to get a book taking 10 mins.

When DD was small we got an annual pass for a local attraction and would take a picnic. I also got reduced price English Heritage membership through work so again I would pack a picnic and we’d head out for a ‘free’ day.

We would occasionally grab a drink/piece of cake or an ice cream but not all the time. The English Heritage also meant we could take a her friend for free sometimes which also meant DD was entertained (and her friends parents got a break!)

@jumpinthecoolpool OP I think you've done a great job continuing to engage with this thread, which has inevitably gone much the way of the puddlesuit threads in COVID (I'm still scarred by lockdown and being stuck at home with a very full on toddler). Were you even looking for advice or just to vent? Probably as much the latter or the former.

It's been an interesting read nevertheless. Here are a few of my thoughts:

• Perhaps it is my teacher salary but even a lot of these 'only £2' suggestions are kind of missing the point. That for me and two children plus parking is a tenner. I think even a tenner a day really adds up!

• We're big packed lunch makers (which I only cracked when both mine were past about age 3 or 4) but plenty of places don't let you take in your own food.

• To an extent, it's good manners to go with the majority sometimes. Other parents feel bad if you're denying your kids an ice cream whilst theirs are having one. Other parents suggest activities that cost money. You can't spend every single day saying no to everything. My parents did and I just look back on it as rather mean, not frugal.

• I spent the whole of the 90s playing out. That's why my parents didn't need to entertain me. I'd love if my kids could but they can't. No one even has a house phone now and the children are too young for mobiles so it's up to parents to set up playdates. Unfortunately there's no way of going back to how things were, even if we'd like to.

Thanks for the apology, I apologise for coming across that way. Listen, for all of us saying it gets worse with the demands and spending money, it’s easy to forget how hard it is with your children’s young ages, especially the energy required. Your DH working from home just adds do it all, I find that hard when it happens with us (also have a partner who works from home few days a week, I’m also a teacher).

When I look back now, doing stupid things like jumping off 9ft walls and playing around a disused mill pond, there were so many times I could have met a sticky end. Makes me feel a bit funny. I'd rather DS has a mate round here and they play Minecraft!

I am also a teacher who has 2 about the same age so I really feel you! I guess I like to remind myself how much we save on nursery fees by being term time only and justify making my life easier that way. We also don't go away or spend that much on holidays throughout the year in order to have more cash for all the school holidays, that's more to do with mine being really hard work away though tbh!

Do none of the 'children need to be bored, just leave them to entertain themselves ' have kids for which this just results in constant fighting?!

Not RTFT, but yes and no to the OP. On one hand I feel like we can't step out of the house without spending £20. But on the other hand, DC have been wanting to spend most of their time at home towards the end of the holidays (actually slightly annoying as I took the week off to spend with them). We've done one big day out to a big sports event, but otherwise they've mostly wanted to have friends round, or relax which involves too much screen time really. DC are 11 and 8 and I'm finding that if I want to get them out of the house, shorter local things like swimming/tennis/bike ride work better than zoos/National Trust etc. So next year I will be better prepared and keep this in mind.

Some young children are able to be independent and entertain themselves and some can not. Just like adults they re all different and have their own strengths and weaknesses. My nearly 4 & 3 year old are very independent and literally play independently and together happily all day long with minimal intervention from me but my older ones were like that also. I almost have to beg them to let me join in 🤣.

school holidays are expensive my older 5 are now either left school or teens so they spend most of their time vegging out or with friends. But when they were younger and with my youngest two I don’t spend much money. We’ve had two big days out that cost money all the other days we’ve done parks, picnics, garden days, walks and house days etc. and surprisingly the older ones did join in. I haven’t any more suggestions than those that have prob been mentioned. What i will say is I notice a difference between my sister and I. I am a stay at home mum, my sister a primary school teacher. Her school holidays with her two are very costly, they have an amazing time but less so on her bank balance. My niece and nephew are less easily entertained with walks, parks etc they seem to need days out that cost money. Where mine are happy with picnics in the woods, mini park crawls, walks etc. but my oldest ones who have left school always chat about their favourite school holidays and it’s all those activities that cost me minimal and we did have big costly days out every now and again but those never get talked about. I totally get it’s also about maintaining your own sanity, sometimes for our peace of mind it’s just easier to say yes 🙈🤣.

My husband likes to comment about the costs of days out when he is at work but then doesn’t think twice on him spending money to go to a theme park on a weekend when he isn’t at work. It’s annoying and incredibly frustrating but it’s not deliberate mine is just an idiot 🤣 xx

This is more a tip for those with older primary/tween DC but I am considering getting a forestry England family membership for next year (cheaper than NT), between the walking and bike trails and the big playgrounds we can easily spend a whole day there without going on the additional Go Apes most of them have.

DS was 3 when Covid hit and he was at home full-time for 6 months. The first thing we did was introduce ‘family time out’, where those at home would go into their rooms for an hour. We started with 20mins on his Gro Clock and increased as quickly as we could. He understood the concept quickly.

He wasn’t a reader (in Germany, he started school close to his 7th birthday and only learnt to read then). However, it turned out he loved audiobooks. We also had a selection of multi-purpose imaginative toys in his room. Sometimes we would start him on a game beforehand. It was really about helping him discover how he relaxed - for other kids that might be colouring or puzzles.

At nearly 10, we will still sometimes call a family time out, or he will ask for it. The toys have changed (Playmobil and Kapla are in), but it’s a godsend in the holidays when everyone just needs a break and well worth starting it early.

From 3-8 we also had very structured days at home - generally toy or baking or art activity in the morning, main meal for lunch at 12, family time out, then outside in the afternoon (we have forest and playgrounds locally).

A picky eater, I always packed bits for any packed lunch rather than sandwiches.

That certainly helps.

A friend of mine does similar with 3, but it will have involved a lot more work.

I have 3 children (4-7 years) and we will also have structured days at home which involves lots of crafts/baking. They love baking cakes and crafts so will do this all together for a few hours. I have lots of craft sets, as well as just random making with paints/junk/card.

Then I will need to get some work/cleaning/jobs done so they will have an hour or so of free play (they will generally do imaginative play for this). But I also have a lot of activity books - suited for each age- dot to dots/letter writing/simple maths for 4 year old. Suduko/Word searches/number puzzles for 7 year old.

Then after lunch will be outdoor play- trampoline/paddling pool/playhouse. Again I will often get some work done whilst sat in the garden supervising.

The girls are more than happy for the odd day doing this. However would also need other days out for other days (50:50)

Tap water for everyone. Take picnics where you can, no need for sandwiches if DCs don’t like them, you can take lots of other options like pasta salad, make sausage rolls, crackers with ham and cheese for example. Take drinks with you. Go to the supermarket with them and they choose the ice creams they want. If they ask for ice creams when out say they can choose one of theirs when they’re home. Play dates with their friends makes the smaller free parks more interesting. We’ve had a mix of holiday clubs and time off this summer as we both have to work, but on my days with DCs I’ve been doing those sorts of things so we can afford some of the more expensive days out and activities too.

Would see if you can find a different library for the summer reading challenge - our library during summer is full of little ones - the 2 -4 preschool age group ( siblings welcome) have a character day on a Thursday - so A Peppa pig, a knight, a pirate, whatever... someone there gets to pull the short straw and dress up (though they do seem to raise some enthusiasm when I've been)

the kids do a craft, a "find the stickers" trail, a "what's the password" - find and ask the member of staff with a big badge on. There's a story time with someone reading out a story from the theme (billed as quiet story time, but the participatory "aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrr"s on pirate day were certainly not quiet! Sometimes they even remember to return and choose a book and collect a sticker...
For us it took a good half a day with walking there and back - kids usually in the buggy on the way back.

They'd have breakfast or lunch at home first, so no food stop needed, council run activities are always run mid morning, or mid afternoon for that reason.

We get the local "what's on " booklet through the letterbox monthly which lists loads of activities. We have sky telly which comes with some freebies, tesco club points, nectar points, look at every loyalty scheme you can. We've been to every local summer fete, every paws in the park, every fire/police station open day - dd still has a stress ball in the shape of a police car... all can be half day activities where you go home for or go after lunch at home.
I'd just say no to ice cream and have an ice pop at home. Couldn’t spend what we didn't have.

I agree with you regarding the Science Museum. It was ok but not a scratch on the Natural History Museum and yes, the cool stuff costs a fortune. Definitely heaving as well, I can’t believe the amount who don’t prebook a free ticket for NHM so queue outside for an eternity!

That sounds decent. Our local library didn’t do anything for it at all and the prizes this year were terrible - a medal, certificate and drawstring bag. Also we do the summer reading challenge every year but the only activity involved with this is a visit to the library once a week. It’s nice but you’re there for an hour absolute max and that’s a push for most kids. Some of the activities people have said on here sound nice but don’t last long e.g helping with the evening meal, picking blackberries … ok cool but what about the rest of the day?