DD overdose. The system is broken? Any advice?

Couldn’t agree more.

on the surface my daughter looks like she is playing normally but she only really maintains interest if it’s a topic she is invested in that the play is centred on. There’s nothing more that she loves than bringing something she is fixated on to her friends and having them take an interest in it too. But it gets too intense. If the friend wants to change subject she will try and direct it back to her thing quite frequently and I can see her friends losing interest . She will also often put the toy too close to the persons face or body etc. However the nice thing about it is that I’ve realised this is an ‘in’ with her. So often we might sit and look at unboxing videos of a toy she is interested in or talk about which of her toys I like the most which helps her feels like I’m enjoying her interest too and invested in it. I do actually enjoy some of it!

My daughter also struggled to join in with play but this was only noticed when I pointed it out to her school. She was very good at 1:1 interactions and still functions best that way but has told me that she ‘is a very good friend and people want to be her friend because she is kind and tells jokes’ 🤗

Again all of this could have gone unnoticed had I not worked in the field and so knew some things were unusual. She does have massive sensory issues as well which helped complete the picture.

Constant overthinking is very much an ADHD trait. I know you said she definitely doesn't have this, but perhaps it would be useful to read more about how ADHD can present in girls. All my son's OCd traits vanished when starting ADHD meds.

Are there any parent carer type groups near you? Some carer centres offer grouos or even 1:1 sessions. You generally don't need a diagnosis. It can really help to chat to parents going through similar.

Hi OP

Im so glad you have some support underway.

Yes OCD can be standalone or part of another condition because different neurotypes often overlap.

currently reading a book called raising a sensory smart child which is fascinating and provides all kinds of interesting analysis and research around the cause of sensory issues (and makes clear autism isn’t necessarily the reason). I’ve attached a snippet. Maybe might be more evidence for using antidepressants.

As for friendships- it is so overwhelmingly lonely at times. I have lost one very good friend since my daughter became diagnosed as I tried to reach out to explain I was really struggling to cope with the issues she has etc. She didn’t show much interest/care and it kind of made it difficult to keep the friendship going as it is all encompassing for me sometimes.

Please know you aren’t alone though, there are lots of us out there feeling the same.

Image is under review but have attached an excerpt which describes how dopamine and serotonin levels cause sensory issues.

I'm so sorry to hear this - it sounds like things have seriously spiralled.

I guess the first thing I would say is please try to separate yourself from what is goingbon with her. Your self worth is not dependent on hers. You cannot necessarily fix her and you can still function as a separate person even while she is spiralling.

You may have to get used to her being like this for the time being. I know several girls who basically never leave their bedrooms and they end up with online friends and a peculiar lifestyle but they are safe.

Maybe just hold back on the interventions for now and concentrate on what helps her to feel regulated. And please try to separate yourself from all of this. I am sure there will be closed Facebook groups for parents dealing with this - try searching Facebook with key words. And reach out to your local carer's network xxx

@BeethovenNinth when my dd was unwell an anti-depressent sufficiently improved her underlying mood to enable her to engage with therapy. She couldn't before.

Regarding your wellbeing, it might be an idea to contact social services to request a carer's assessment. They may well have initiatives that coukd support you.

All the best

Sending you huge hugs.

When my son was at his worst, not attending school, self harming, breaking things, I felt entirely lost and broken. Seeing everyone else happily attending school was heartbreaking.

But... there are thousands of us out here with similar issues. Have a look at Not Fine in School on FB for example. See if there's a local parent carer group. Once you surround yourself with other people who.understand it genuinely makes a huge difference. Contact disability social services team, see if there's an education outreach of inclusion team too.

Your local carers centre might have ideas or links to social groups that could also help your daughter. I would be wary of online groups for her though as some are overly disability focused and could make things worse.

I am hopefully on the other side now. It took a massive battle, a lot of money that for a single parent was really problematic . But my son is now thriving again - something that often felt entirely impossible. Remember to have hope too x

With social services you need to use SHANARRI indicators to show level of need. You could write a letter with a short paragraph against each indicator saying why she needs support. If you look online you'll also fine the criteria. Different in each area but for ours there's a scoring system for SS input. Check the criteria and do your letter accordingly. It's far harder for them to turn down than if you just write a letter without showing how need meets their framework.

For example (apologies if any of the details are wrong - I can't rememebr the full thread):

• Safe: Protected from abuse, neglect, harm, and danger.

Dd has attempted suicide, and self harms regularly. This has led to hospital treatment and a need to hide xyz (sharps, meds etc).

• Healthy:
• Enjoying high standards of physical and mental health.

Dd has had singinicantly poor mental health since x. This leads to DD being unable to leave the house, join in social or educational activiites. DD has eating issues which has led to significantly weight loss (give figs if possible). DD is unable to take part in regular exercise.

@BeethovenNinth therapists, yes, they're like shoes. You have to find a few pairs that fit. Anti-depressants, she was started on fluoxetine and it worked well for her. The challenge was finding the right doese and that's where the private adolescent psychiatrist paid dividends. 20 wasn't quite enough, 40 too much. The psychiatrist suggested adding 10 every other day which had a fabulous result. The GP didn't want to because the cost of 10s was dispropprtionately more expensive, a letter from the psychiatrist crqcked it and turned a "no" into a cat's bum face.

DD still takes it at 28, increasing 60 in the five days before a peruod because she has PMD quite badly.

I say again. We got through this and dd is now a fully functioning secondary teacher, getting married next year. There is hope.

You sound broken. Im so sorry. It will pass and you’ll feel better when you gain a bit of a sense of control.

Unless the Prozac was in capsules, I’d have used a pill cutter to cut a 20mg tablet in half?

We are used to titrating DD1 up and down on drugs regularly, and pill cutters are essential for us!

It comes in capsules.

We always read the BNF before we take anything. According to it, fluoxetine also comes in 20 mg tablets, or a liquid form (20 mg in 5 mls):

https://bnf.nice.org.uk/drugs/fluoxetine/medicinal-forms/#oral-tablet

According to this, they are scored, so patients can use a pill cutter and cut them in half, because it’s cheaper than paying for 10 mg tablets:

https://www.medicines.org.uk/emc/product/5358/pil

20 mg are £3.44 for 28 versus 10 mg for £61.73 for 30.

@LathkillDale respectfully, dd has taken prozac/fluoxetine for more than 10 years. She needed 25/30mg 10/11 years ago. I had several discussions with the GP Senuor Partner. At that time, the tavlets were provided in capsule form only; 10mg and 20mg There was resistance to prescribing 10mg. This may have changed.

The alternative at that time was in liquid form and it was vomit inducing. Even if paying, it was v hard then to get hold of 10mg capsules. I recall calling pharmacies over a 20 mile radius.

Do you have a theatre nearby, most of them run weekly groups for teens, a lot of them neurodiverse or struggling in some way, she could join and be involved in drama and putting on plays

See this NHS website - Olena 20 mg fluoxetine tablets start date 2014

https://dmd-browser.nhsbsa.nhs.uk/amp/view/92433?ref=

DD2 was prescribed fluoxetine 17 years ago, and had been on antidepressants ever since, until she got pregnant last year, when she chose to come off them.

GPs can and do lie about what drugs are available. Ours lied to me, that the emergency medication formulation DD1 was on, was no longer manufactured, even though it was on the websites of the CCG and LA, that it was the recommended formulation, because all care workers in the county were trained to use it; and it would be confusing for them to use another formulation at a different strength. The LA’s epilepsy nurse had to write twice to the practice to point this out to them. All because it wasn’t on their electronic prescribing system, and they had to hand write the prescription.

This sounds like a positive development in her thinking; maybe she needed to hit her low.

My DD never went back to being suicidal again; she actually has very few memories from that entire year. It’s like it never happened.

Prozac changed everything for her, almost instantly.