Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Baby's first birthday to ask for no boxed gifts?

284 replies

sarak20 · 16/08/2026 08:44

Is this reasonable or no. For some context: I have bought all the toys I would like my baby to play with and don't want others gifting toys that I have no space to store. Is it appropriate to ask for no boxed gifts? Thanks

OP posts:
nomorekitchenislandsplease · 16/08/2026 09:36

Could you write a wish list of small things DC will need in the next year? Nappies, pyjamas, foods etc?

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · 16/08/2026 09:38

NervousSheepy · 16/08/2026 09:36

Except for not being at all less rude.

Show quote history

Well yes I completely agree!

YouSawBrigadoon · 16/08/2026 09:38

It’s a naff way of asking for cash. And for a child’s first birthday? How vulgar and tacky.

Justanotherteacher · 16/08/2026 09:38

Buy the biggest teddy bear you can find. One of those 6 foot tall ones. Then deliver it with as much fanfare as you can manage. The baby will love it!

Takingtigermountainbystrategy · 16/08/2026 09:40

Get them a puppy

Delphiniumandlupins · 16/08/2026 09:41

Ask for the child's savings account details if you're giving a monetary gift so you can pay it in directly. Or give a gift voucher for Jojo Maman Bebe, Smyths or your nearest soft play. I think asking for money in this way is a bit naff and specifying the expected amount really rude.

B1anche · 16/08/2026 09:41

If someone said to me "no boxed gifts" with no other context, I would assume they want stuff that's homemade or second hand.

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · 16/08/2026 09:42

Redcars · 16/08/2026 09:35

I transfer 20 /30 pounds to young family members savings accounts for birthdays and xmas . They already have everything tjey need and more. It’s boring but hopefully it means it will mount up and be used for something they really want one day.

It really does add up. My older teens have a few thousand now purely from birthday/Christmas monetary gifts given each year from birth - we’re only talking a handful at £20-£50 each.

Cuppachuchu · 16/08/2026 09:43

Buy a gift. Take it out of the box. Wrap.
Job done.
People are so annoyingly prescriptive these days.
£50 cash for a baby's 1st birthday? 😲

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 16/08/2026 09:43

No more dopey reverses!

Cookiesunderthesofa · 16/08/2026 09:44

I’d buy a finger paint set or a really really noisy toy!

YourWildAmberSloth · 16/08/2026 09:44

sarak20 · 16/08/2026 08:54

Thanks for all your replies. This is what my sister in law has asked everyone to do. She has put on the invites "no boxed gifts". She is expecting everyone to give £50 and above. I have four kids it isn't exactly easy for me to dish out £100 to her. I would have much preferred to buy my own gifts. What would you do in this situation?

A voucher for the amount that you can afford - Argos, Boots, M&S. Or clothing that she can grow into - onsies or sleepsuits, something relatively generic. DS had lots of christening gifts (and 1st birthday) of the ornamental type that were never used and are languising in storage in boxes somewhere.

HollaHolla · 16/08/2026 09:45

Books. I’d give books every time.

TrunkElliot · 16/08/2026 09:45

Are reverses against talk guidelines?

Dependsoncontext · 16/08/2026 09:46

I wouldn't address this directly but just do what you would normally do but avoid boxed items. I'd probably send a book token or book, as others have suggested to the value that I would usually spend. I think if she is miffed by that, let her be.

hellisemptyandallthedevilsarehere · 16/08/2026 09:46

£50!! She’s crackers and greedy. A voucher or book is more than sufficient.

PancakeCloud · 16/08/2026 09:46

sarak20 · 16/08/2026 08:59

This is my first niece. I had planned to get her a lot of personalised keepsakes. But now I've been thrown with "no boxed gifts" and she does keep hinting she only wants cash as she's bought her child absolutely everything he needs

Don’t give cash. A personalised keepsake isn’t boxed. Your sister sounds very grabby.

LemonSnail · 16/08/2026 09:46

sarak20 · 16/08/2026 08:54

Thanks for all your replies. This is what my sister in law has asked everyone to do. She has put on the invites "no boxed gifts". She is expecting everyone to give £50 and above. I have four kids it isn't exactly easy for me to dish out £100 to her. I would have much preferred to buy my own gifts. What would you do in this situation?

I’d buy a £10 autumn outfit from Primark.

PersephoneParlormaid · 16/08/2026 09:47

I’d buy an outfit or a book

Bogofftosomewherehot · 16/08/2026 09:47

I HATE personalised gifts and keepsakes. All they do is clutter up the house, then the loft, then eventually go to charity.
She sounds very grabby and you need to set a precedent for the future that she doesn't get to demand £50 cash each time.
Tell your brother it will be a small book and maybe a tenner.

I wouldn't be going in for that nonsense.
Maybe different if she sets up an account in the child's name that you can transfer an amount of your choice.

Bacarditropicalfizz · 16/08/2026 09:48

LemonSnail · 16/08/2026 09:46

I’d buy a £10 autumn outfit from Primark.

Show quote history

Yessss a pumpkin costume. Extra points if it’s got a frilly tutu.

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 16/08/2026 09:48

TrunkElliot · 16/08/2026 09:45

Are reverses against talk guidelines?

They should be. They’re pointless.

The OP clearly knows (not@sarak20in particular) that the other person is talking bollocks.
So, why the need to create a thread having loads of people confirm that they’re correct.

LoafofSellotape · 16/08/2026 09:48

ChickenBananaBanana · 16/08/2026 08:49

No boxed gifts sounds like pony up some cash. I'd think it was pretty rude tbh

Absolutely!

Donate anything you don't want or need but honestly asking for anything else is really rude!

CherryPieToday · 16/08/2026 09:49

I wouldn't convert cash into vouchers. It makes absolutely no financial sense to convert something that is 100% safe and accepted everywhere, into something that is only accepted in specific shops and at risk of the company going into administration and becoming worthless.

Twofurrypurries · 16/08/2026 09:49

sarak20 · 16/08/2026 09:03

Do you think a voucher is a better option so I know the money is actually being spent on the baby and not herself? My sister in law hates me so I really don't want to be gifting her my hard earned cash for her to just spend it on herself 🫠

Yes. My suggestion would be a Clarks or Startright voucher that they can use for baby’s first pair of shoes. We did this as a gift for a friend and she was really pleased. Kids shoes are expensive.

While personalised keepsakes are lovely, kids come with so much ‘stuff’ and finding places to store it all gets more difficult as time goes on.