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Furious at ds work dismissal

990 replies

OneGreyBiscuit · 03/08/2026 14:29

This is more has my 19 year old ds employers been unreasonable. He's just been sacked for being unreliable. For context - he accepted a new job about a month ago. He informed them of where he lives which is about a forty minute train journey away. He is a few minutes late everyday because of the trains and they said they were ok with it. He's just come off holiday (which he informed them of) and went back today. He was sent an email before today telling him to get an earlier train so he's on time. Fair enough, so he did and would've continued doing. At 9 he was called into a meeting to tell him his contracts been terminated for unreliability. He was only informed of getting an earlier train from today, so how can they dismiss him like this? If he continued to get the later train and continued being late then I'd understand but they've not even given him a chance. I'm absolutely furious. And to add insult to injury he still had to pay for his waste of time and money train fare this morning.

OP posts:
Donsyb · 07/08/2026 07:44

Jeska7 · 06/08/2026 22:16

Wow some of these comments are awful. You said he was only a minute or two late. Personally I would have thought this was acceptable if they said it was ok and he agreed to work those few minutes at lunchtime or after the usual finish time. I think most people would have taken the person at their word and if they said it was ok believed them. I guess that’s a lesson for next time - if something similar crops up - to get it in writing and for him to specifically get permission. As others have said, it might be that one person agreed but another person wasn’t happy and they’ve likely had a catch on”how’s he getting in?” whilst he’s been away. A more senior person has perhaps overruled the person who said it was ok.

Make sure he gets the right salary with his notice period etc although I guess he’s probably taken more holiday than he’s entitled to (but that’s just an unfortunate situation having booked a holiday and the timings of starting work).

I think it is really important in this to consider how many trains are running. If there’s a train 10 minutes earlier then he needed to catch that, but if it’s an hour earlier and he would have arrived 55 minute early most mornings then an agreement to be a minute or two late would be more reasonable perhaps. Maybe discuss this at the interview if he’s applying for jobs in the same city and likely to arrive a bit late. He should have agreed to work the missed time even if it’s a few minutes each day. If that didn’t fit in with trains, he could have asked about working the whole lost time on a single day or something. Best to get agreement at interview and discuss what happens if the train is late, or certainly on the first day of work.

As others have said, he/you probably cannot do much as they can get rid of anyone in their probation period for no real reason. I’m sorry he’s lost his job and I’d be annoyed too. I hope he gets sorted.

I’ve always worked at organisations where I have flexi time so I guess I don’t quite understand this. All my workplaces have been really flexible although I did do a part-time retail job in sixth form, got agreement to be late from the shop manager one day as I had an A level exam that finished late and I knew I’d struggle to get there in time, I rushed there after my exam, arrived 3-4 minutes late and was laid into by the area manager. I was only young and didn’t get a chance to even tell him I had permission to be late. I was so upset in floods of tears. Some managers can just be awful. In all my “proper” jobs including my current job (after the retail one), I could/can just turn up when I wanted as long as I work the core hours (10-12 and 2-4) and work the right number of hours per week / month. University, local authority and NHS jobs generally have flexible working. More difficult to get sacked for nothing too in the public sector!

Goox luck. Hope he gets sorted with a better job soon. Maybe take it as a blessing. It perhaps wasn’t the best place to work.

No workplace I have ever worked at would accept you being late every single day. And we only have his word for it that they said it was ok.

emmas123 · 07/08/2026 10:36

Jeska7 · 06/08/2026 22:16

Wow some of these comments are awful. You said he was only a minute or two late. Personally I would have thought this was acceptable if they said it was ok and he agreed to work those few minutes at lunchtime or after the usual finish time. I think most people would have taken the person at their word and if they said it was ok believed them. I guess that’s a lesson for next time - if something similar crops up - to get it in writing and for him to specifically get permission. As others have said, it might be that one person agreed but another person wasn’t happy and they’ve likely had a catch on”how’s he getting in?” whilst he’s been away. A more senior person has perhaps overruled the person who said it was ok.

Make sure he gets the right salary with his notice period etc although I guess he’s probably taken more holiday than he’s entitled to (but that’s just an unfortunate situation having booked a holiday and the timings of starting work).

I think it is really important in this to consider how many trains are running. If there’s a train 10 minutes earlier then he needed to catch that, but if it’s an hour earlier and he would have arrived 55 minute early most mornings then an agreement to be a minute or two late would be more reasonable perhaps. Maybe discuss this at the interview if he’s applying for jobs in the same city and likely to arrive a bit late. He should have agreed to work the missed time even if it’s a few minutes each day. If that didn’t fit in with trains, he could have asked about working the whole lost time on a single day or something. Best to get agreement at interview and discuss what happens if the train is late, or certainly on the first day of work.

As others have said, he/you probably cannot do much as they can get rid of anyone in their probation period for no real reason. I’m sorry he’s lost his job and I’d be annoyed too. I hope he gets sorted.

I’ve always worked at organisations where I have flexi time so I guess I don’t quite understand this. All my workplaces have been really flexible although I did do a part-time retail job in sixth form, got agreement to be late from the shop manager one day as I had an A level exam that finished late and I knew I’d struggle to get there in time, I rushed there after my exam, arrived 3-4 minutes late and was laid into by the area manager. I was only young and didn’t get a chance to even tell him I had permission to be late. I was so upset in floods of tears. Some managers can just be awful. In all my “proper” jobs including my current job (after the retail one), I could/can just turn up when I wanted as long as I work the core hours (10-12 and 2-4) and work the right number of hours per week / month. University, local authority and NHS jobs generally have flexible working. More difficult to get sacked for nothing too in the public sector!

Goox luck. Hope he gets sorted with a better job soon. Maybe take it as a blessing. It perhaps wasn’t the best place to work.

Also worth noting the job was in finance. One of the worst reputations for upholding face-time and long hours in the office as a symbol of work ethic, and often a long way from a cushy flexi / remote job. Presenteeism and punctuality are very important in that industry.

OP's son presumably has looked into the industry and career and would know this - if not, he may well want to look at a change of sector if he's chronically late/unpunctual as an individual.

Ladyfromthehill · 08/08/2026 08:04

MonaLisa3847 · 03/08/2026 21:56

And now in his graduate job he stayed late today till 7pm to get some tasks done.

That is actually pretty unhealthy, here comes the burnout before they hit their 30s!

MonaLisa3847 · 08/08/2026 08:14

Ladyfromthehill · 08/08/2026 08:04

That is actually pretty unhealthy, here comes the burnout before they hit their 30s!

Because he cleared his backlog the rest of the week went super well. When the going gets tough you have to put the work in. Lots of people work longer than 9-5. DH works lots longer hours and even the weekends. He handles it! Some people are just tough and can handle staying after 5pm

KilkennyCats · 08/08/2026 15:13

Ladyfromthehill · 08/08/2026 08:04

That is actually pretty unhealthy, here comes the burnout before they hit their 30s!

Burnout 🙄. The days of 9-5 are long gone.

FinallyHere · 08/08/2026 15:32

What does being a ‘few minutes late’ actually mean? I’ve always got to work in plenty of time to get a coffee while my laptop boots up, and I can log in. Check my emails and messages for anything really urgent which has come in overnight

catch up talking to whoever is around and then yes, start the first meeting in working hours in time.

Did OP mean that their son was not quite early enough so laptop was still booting up when working hours started …. Or that they entered the building a few minutes late ? And did they really mean every single day?

And did he indeed stay on late after the technical end of the day or was he first out again, too?

Anarchy99 · 08/08/2026 15:41

Ladyfromthehill · 08/08/2026 08:04

That is actually pretty unhealthy, here comes the burnout before they hit their 30s!

Staying til 7.00 is unhealthy and the young will burn out?

Bloody hell. 🙈

madaboutpurple · 08/08/2026 17:03

Wherever he works next he will need to be on time and in fact better to arrive a few minutes earlier.

Donsyb · 08/08/2026 17:05

KilkennyCats · 08/08/2026 15:13

Burnout 🙄. The days of 9-5 are long gone.

Actually that depends where you work. I made a conscious decision a few years ago (when menopause hit) to take a step back, and now have a job which is 9-5, Monday to Friday and reasonably well paid.

Donsyb · 08/08/2026 17:06

FinallyHere · 08/08/2026 15:32

What does being a ‘few minutes late’ actually mean? I’ve always got to work in plenty of time to get a coffee while my laptop boots up, and I can log in. Check my emails and messages for anything really urgent which has come in overnight

catch up talking to whoever is around and then yes, start the first meeting in working hours in time.

Did OP mean that their son was not quite early enough so laptop was still booting up when working hours started …. Or that they entered the building a few minutes late ? And did they really mean every single day?

And did he indeed stay on late after the technical end of the day or was he first out again, too?

Edited

I‘M assuming if he took the same train every day, and the train made him late, then yes - he would be late every day 🤷🏼‍♀️

MonaLisa3847 · 08/08/2026 17:31

KilkennyCats · 08/08/2026 15:13

Burnout 🙄. The days of 9-5 are long gone.

His friends work till 11pm.... And they get paid more for a reason?

MonaLisa3847 · 08/08/2026 17:34

Anarchy99 · 08/08/2026 15:41

Staying til 7.00 is unhealthy and the young will burn out?

Bloody hell. 🙈

He got up and went to the office on time the next day as well

Temporal · 08/08/2026 18:39

I bet he wasn't a 'few minutes late' at the end of his shift, though... I start at 8 am, and I'm usually in between 7.30 and 7.45.

HiEarthlings · 08/08/2026 23:05

OneGreyBiscuit · 03/08/2026 21:53

Oh that's nice, how lovely to have such a perfect child

And you have the temerity to complain about people being bitchy to you? 🤦🏼‍♂️

Peterbyres1 · 09/08/2026 06:45

Hello is 19, not 9 and I very much doubt his employers agreed to accept constant late arrival at work. Time for him to grow up and show some maturity.

Dogsandphotography · 09/08/2026 07:23

OneGreyBiscuit · 03/08/2026 14:35

He told me that they were ok with him being a few minutes late as they were fully aware he gets the train, if they had a problem, they should've told him the first week and not say it was ok.

Both you and your son sound thick as mince. You for believing him when he said his new employer told him it was Ok to be consistently late for work and him for not having the nous to understand you get to work, particularly a new job, on time by setting off earlier.

Fortunately I'm 10 years retired but my understanding is it's a pretty tough job market out there right now. It's tough for everyone but especially for those just entering the job market with limited skills and experience.

Hopefully your son will take a life lesson from this and he gets a new role soon.

Kathy286 · 09/08/2026 08:41

Why didn't he catch an earlier train to begin with? You can't be late every day and expect your employer to be happy with it.

donaldson7111 · 09/08/2026 10:01

Why didn’t you tell him to get an earlier train?

Why didn’t he think to get an earlier train?

you come on here to complain about the company who sacked an employee for being repeatedly late. Rather than see it as an opportunity to teach him a life lesson. Clearly you need it too.

Imdunfer · 09/08/2026 10:05

Ladyfromthehill · 08/08/2026 08:04

That is actually pretty unhealthy, here comes the burnout before they hit their 30s!

When did young people get indoctrinated with this message that some spells of hard work will somehow harm a healthy individual?

Loulou4022 · 09/08/2026 10:07

You need to be teaching your son better timekeeping habits not gobbing off that he’s been sacked because of it!
I have a 2 hour commute twice a week and I leave the house 2 1/2 hrs before I start work to allow time for traffic etc. Swanning in a couple of minutes late everyday is not ok! I’m guessing he was then having his full lunch break and leaving at the correct time and in no way trying to make up for the lost time! I’d also be questioning your sons version of events that they said that was fine if they have now sacked him!

Anarchy99 · 09/08/2026 11:07

MonaLisa3847 · 08/08/2026 17:34

He got up and went to the office on time the next day as well

I should hope so. As someone who has worked more extra hours than I can count over my career, I can’t imagine rocking up late just because of working til 7.00 the night before.

But then I remember working 9 am to 11 pm (no payment for the overtime) without a break, then being expected to come in early the next day!

OonaStubbs · 09/08/2026 11:09

The problem is that schools are too lax and so are parents, so kids aren't adults at 19 and still expect to be treated as kids. And then they wonder why firms won't set on young people and prefer to employ older people who know that it is expected to be on time for work each and every day.

Anarchy99 · 09/08/2026 11:22

OonaStubbs · 09/08/2026 11:09

The problem is that schools are too lax and so are parents, so kids aren't adults at 19 and still expect to be treated as kids. And then they wonder why firms won't set on young people and prefer to employ older people who know that it is expected to be on time for work each and every day.

Exactly that! And they expect flexibility and working from home (apparently not too much wfh or they feel uncared for in the workplace).

Many jobs require some extra working - people who go into those sectors generally understand that. Yet the younger members of staff are out the door on the dot, leaving others to pick up the slack. Or they do it and expect every second of time back.

Even graduates often need handholding to a ridiculous degree over things that are common sense.

MonaLisa3847 · 09/08/2026 11:31

Anarchy99 · 09/08/2026 11:07

I should hope so. As someone who has worked more extra hours than I can count over my career, I can’t imagine rocking up late just because of working til 7.00 the night before.

But then I remember working 9 am to 11 pm (no payment for the overtime) without a break, then being expected to come in early the next day!

He can handle the workload and enjoys a bit of pressure

Ladyfromthehill · 09/08/2026 11:39

Imdunfer · 09/08/2026 10:05

When did young people get indoctrinated with this message that some spells of hard work will somehow harm a healthy individual?

Toxic workplaces and no work life balance are still going strong I see.