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Welp i yelled so angerly at my 6 year old yesterday

143 replies

lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 00:27

I know she is not stupid, but sometimes i kinda feel she is a bit, and i can’t understand always why she does these stuff when she knows what she is doing is bad and will get scolded for it. Well yesterday i lost it.. (i use corn stratch powder under my breast bcs lot sweat..) anyways i had a 500ml bottle of it and it was pretty full, and even if i told my kid 3 times to go to sleep because she ends up having the lights on to read and that ends up she needs to go to the toilet bcs she is not sleeping or trying to. So after i told her to go back up to sleep very firmly, i thought she was sleeping until i smelled something very familiar down the living room, and omg i lost it… powder EVERYWHERE the whole stairs where covered in powder and the second floor and the attic stairs and my bed was litteraly a powder party.. the whole bottle was empty.. its not the first time she throws stuff down stairs last time it was sunscreen but it wasn’t as bad as the powder. I litteraly just don’t understand why she does it!

She is not 2-3-4 years old but soon 7! I litteraly lost it by screaming in anger «goo the F to sleep!» she was crying after that i think she got scared i have never used my voice like that before but i just lost it. Because there was litteraly no reason for her to go crazy with that powder and toss it everywhere, it was insane, powder everywhere, like i just didn’t deep clean that for 2 days ago😭 and know smell and powder everywhere.. i have punished her by no tv and no screen time. I did tell her that sneaking into moms bedrom and take stuff without asking is not ok, and it will get punishment. What else could i have done?

OP posts:
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WhatNoRaisins · 13/02/2025 15:51

In the long run OP I wonder if it would help to have a bedtime routine that is the same every night. I'm not condoning her behaviour, she's old enough to know better, but the consistency and knowing what's going to happen each night might help to calm things.

Finallybackinbootcuts · 13/02/2025 15:47

YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt · 13/02/2025 15:42

The way you are communicating to us here is quite disjointed and reactionary. I wonder if it is the same way you relate to her?

Children can respond to emotional volatility by acting out as a way to control responses and their environment.

Your punishments seem disorganised and also out of proportion.

While I don’t condone the shouting/swearing remember the child covered the entire room in talc powder that she nicked from her mums room. It’s not like she did nothing wrong.

YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt · 13/02/2025 15:42

lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 14:21

Mean mum bla bla bla. Then no consequenses? AT ALL?
@SecondMrsTanqueray

The way you are communicating to us here is quite disjointed and reactionary. I wonder if it is the same way you relate to her?

Children can respond to emotional volatility by acting out as a way to control responses and their environment.

Your punishments seem disorganised and also out of proportion.

lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 14:21

Mean mum bla bla bla. Then no consequenses? AT ALL?
@SecondMrsTanqueray

OP posts:
lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 14:12

@loropianalover well i guess it a thing to judge other parents for having human feelings.

OP posts:
Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 13:39

lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 13:34

@YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt where did i say i used the dentist as punishment? Btw she loves the dentist epscislly since they give delish fluor lol. I used the we weren’t going to get icecream after the dentist punishment

Why did you think that was necessary when you’ve already given a punishment of no screens, and you reacted very angrily to start with. We all have moments of frustration, but it also needs to be recognised when we overreact. You’ve now punished her in three ways, that’s very heavy handed for a 6 year old. Have you apologised for swearing and given her the opportunity to explain herself yet?

lalabugirl · 13/02/2025 13:34

YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt · 13/02/2025 12:28

Hold on.
You used going to the dentist as a punishment??

That is not only sickening, it will set her up for a lifetime of struggles with the dentist. The dentist is horrible. Associating it with a bad memory is shocking.

Also swearing at your child is not okay.

She is old enough not to be doing this, so it seems like there's something else going on. Either with her or your home environment.

@YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt where did i say i used the dentist as punishment? Btw she loves the dentist epscislly since they give delish fluor lol. I used the we weren’t going to get icecream after the dentist punishment

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:52

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I had an opinion from experience that I am sharing for the OP to consider, that is all.

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:46

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Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:43

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Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:33

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:28

Exactly. How can you, as an adult, not realise that was your opportunity to apologise? Again, you're displaying the parental lessons you're so proud of. You don't get to call other people's opinion such rubbish and then play victim when they throw it back at you. I guess your upbringing didn't teach you that much.

Your self awareness is shocking and it is 'rubbish' as it is just lazy sweeping generalisations about upbringing, it is quite a common belief, hardly personal to you is it, I am diametrically opposed to bringing children up in that way. It is political not personal and actually I'm trying to offer the OP some advice that may help.

Finallybackinbootcuts · 13/02/2025 12:32

She is old enough not to be doing this, so it seems like there's something else going on. Either with her or your home environment

Or alternatively she was just being silly and thoughtless the way 6 year olds can sometimes be.

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:31

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:28

Exactly. How can you, as an adult, not realise that was your opportunity to apologise? Again, you're displaying the parental lessons you're so proud of. You don't get to call other people's opinion such rubbish and then play victim when they throw it back at you. I guess your upbringing didn't teach you that much.

Maybe leave it now, you’re not owed an apology. This is a discussion site and there will be disagreements. You are the one who took it (and is still taking it) too far, and I agree I myself should have stopped engaging with you a few posts ago. What we can learn, and the op, is that tit for tat never solves anything. Draw a line and move on.

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:28

Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:18

Ok mate!

Exactly. How can you, as an adult, not realise that was your opportunity to apologise? Again, you're displaying the parental lessons you're so proud of. You don't get to call other people's opinion such rubbish and then play victim when they throw it back at you. I guess your upbringing didn't teach you that much.

YouDeserveBetterSoAskForIt · 13/02/2025 12:28

Hold on.
You used going to the dentist as a punishment??

That is not only sickening, it will set her up for a lifetime of struggles with the dentist. The dentist is horrible. Associating it with a bad memory is shocking.

Also swearing at your child is not okay.

She is old enough not to be doing this, so it seems like there's something else going on. Either with her or your home environment.

Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:27

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:20

I can see you didn't watch any cartoons as a child or as an adult, it's ok though. Would you like me to recommend one to you? Or are you too emotionally intelligent to stoop to my level? Actually, you already proved you aren't, so I'll just recommend it anyway. Watch "the simpsons" (older episodes though) might help you understand my use of k instead of c

I know the Simpsons more a South Park fan but not as a child as I am British and didn't watch American cartoons really as only had access to four channels.

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:25

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:22

Oh I’m trying, believe me.

You keep replying though, for someone that's supposedly trying......not that I'm saying you can't reply but if you wanted to ignore me, you wouldn't. Therefore, you don't really want to ignore me. But let's stop this now, you guys have hijacked the thread enough. Let's go back to OP

Finallybackinbootcuts · 13/02/2025 12:25

sesquipedalian · 13/02/2025 00:56

@lalabugirl -

What on earth are you going to do if your daughter does something really naughty? No ice cream or café or telly or screen - she’s six, not sixteen! And doing all this blows up what she did into something really big and drags it out through the whole of the next day. Sure, make your displeasure known, but I couldn’t have a whole day overshadowed by something that had taken place the previous evening. Make the punishment fit the crime - which is why I would have got her to help tidy up the mess and then moved on.

I dunno. I’d argue that taking a bottle of powder from mums room and dumping it over the house IS really naughty.

As for the shouting, my parents used to shout at me sometimes and, while I sometimes think maybe they shouldn’t have done, I don’t think it scarred me for life 🤷‍♀️

loropianalover · 13/02/2025 12:24

You lot are worse than the child!

Be Quiet Season 5 GIF by Friends
Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:24

Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:22

Oh, of course. The Simpsons, very funny satire. It's probably because I don't connect the two as I don't think he's a hippy character is he, which I assume is what the poster is deriding me for.

No no, i wasn't comparing you to him, i just said what i said. You don't have a size 15 feet , do you?

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:22

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:19

I believe that poster is referring to Krusty the Clown from The Simpsons. So Krusty makes sense (though not as an insult particularly) but not Klown, as they spell that the usual way.

If krusty can be spelt with a k, so can klown...everything has to be explained huh

Goldenbear · 13/02/2025 12:22

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:19

I believe that poster is referring to Krusty the Clown from The Simpsons. So Krusty makes sense (though not as an insult particularly) but not Klown, as they spell that the usual way.

Oh, of course. The Simpsons, very funny satire. It's probably because I don't connect the two as I don't think he's a hippy character is he, which I assume is what the poster is deriding me for.

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:22

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:21

Stop it, you're making me blush...actually, I'm not capable of blushing, ignore me

Oh I’m trying, believe me.

Quiinkong · 13/02/2025 12:21

Simplynotsimple · 13/02/2025 12:20

I think you’ll find that there’s very few ‘balls’ to be found on Mumsnet, so if you are the owner of a pair I suspect they win by default.

Stop it, you're making me blush...actually, I'm not capable of blushing, ignore me

Dramatic · 13/02/2025 12:20

I have lost my temper at my kids in much the same way, I'm sure most people have. I think a momentary loss of temper in a situation like that is perfectly understandable and quite a reasonable response. If I've ever scared them I have apologised though and explained that I didn't want to scare them. She will still understand she's done wrong even if you apologise.