Girl pulled dd’s pants down

@Miramar79 You are not overreacting. I would want this to be raised as a safeguarding issue and both the girl and her parents to be spoken to by the Head and/or whoever is in charge of the activity. Your poor daughter needs to know that you taking this seriously (from your actions, you obviously are) and that she shouldn't have to accept this type of treatment and it's no less serious because a girl did it and not a boy. As for the girl who did it, what a strange thing to do to another girl in front of a group of boys. If anything, you are helping her by insisting she's spoken to by someone in authority rather than just her parents. She needs to explain why she felt she had to do this and to understand how serious her actions were.

Who is running the club? Is it school or an after school club? Is it a year 2 or year 3 7 year old (thinking the NSPCC pantosaurus resources and if they would be appropriate).
I don't think it matters whether it was all girls or boys present, no one should be doing this and playing this game.

If the Head says you are overreacting, offer to pull their pants down.

I'm gobsmacked at some of the responses here implying you just need to get over it. In my opinion a 7 year old knows that this is absolutely not on.

I would expect consequences for the child in question - possibly a 2 or 3 week suspension from the club (natural consequences - if you can't be trusted to behave, you cannot attend), a discussion with the entire group emphasizing why this sort of behaviour is not acceptable.

And if I was the parent of the culprit I would be seriously unimpressed, there'd be a discussion about how disappointed I am, I'd expect an apology letter to be written and be considering consequences at home.

Better to crack down on this sort of thing at 7 than he dealing with a bully / allegations of sexual assault at an older age.

Your poor dd. It's quite an extreme thing to happen. I never heard of anyone doing that to another child during mine or my dcs' childhood. I hope the club and school take it seriously as its totally unacceptable. They need to find out what's going on with that child.

I'm quite surprised at the reactions as well! Would it be the same if the child had been a 7 year old boy pulling a girls pants down? Just silly kids etc? If this had happened to my daughter boy or girl I would be mortified for her and would want the child who had done this to be properly spoken to either by the school or the club so that they understand the ramifications in an age appropriate way, not just to be made to apologise.

What happened before the girl did it to your dd? And where was the teacher at the time? There are 2 important questions.

This is serious from a safeguarding perspective imo. The school definitely ought to have a talk with the child who did it about respecting other childrens' right to privacy and safety. All children should learn about keeping safe, not flashing private parts etc in pshe. I'd check your school's website to see what pshe stuff they teach in this area.

I wouldn't go in all guns blazing, as it's been and done, but I'd go in clear that you aren't happy about it and want to make sure it doesn't happen again. For all you know the other child could have an unstable home life and very vulnerable because of their living situation, so it is important to make sure it's appropriately documented - to keep the other child safe, as well as your own dd.

I'm amazed at the amount of acceptance for incredibly cruel actions, here.

7 year olds have had their 'what's in my pants is just for me' talk by that age. The girl who did this knew full well what she was doing.

It's not 'silly' it's bullying and it's cruel.

The expectation for OP's DD to just walk back in there like nothing happened is ridiculous.

Yes, let's play down the feeling of a 7 year old girl who has had her private parts flashed to a group of boys.

Just brush it over.

🙄

So the parent is getting the 7 year old child to apologise?
What more do you want her to do?
It's upsetting to see your child upset but you are overreacting.

I would speak to the club and ask them to keep an eye on things to make sure there are no further incidents but beyond that, what are you actually expecting to happen?

There will be a limit to what the head can do about an organised activity outside of school, but they will want to be aware of it in case a pattern emerges.

I'm not sure what else can be done apart from letting the club know.

Seven year olds do daft things sometimes.

Since you have already made the mum aware, I think beyond letting the club know it happened (so they can keep an eye), there isn't much more to do.
Whilst the girl is old enough to know better, she is still young and children sometimes do silly things on the spur of the moment without really thinking it through.
Obviously if it happens again, then you could raise it further.

It would be useful to understand what you yourself want to happen before your meeting with the head to discuss it. You can then set out your argument properly.