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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think my DH has gone mad over this baby name?

419 replies

kweefa · 21/01/2025 10:19

So, I’m currently 37 weeks pregnant with DC2, and DH and I are still arguing over the name. For context, we have a DS(4) called Oliver (family name, everyone loved it, no issues there). But this time, DH has got it into his head that we should name DD something, frankly, ridiculous.

He wants to call her Nevaeh. Yes, “Heaven” backwards. He says it’s “unique but meaningful.” I think it’s chavvy and will age terribly (sorry if that offends anyone). I mean, can you imagine a 50 year old Nevaeh filling out her pension forms?

I’ve suggested plenty of other names Sophie, Amelia, even Freya but he keeps turning them down as “too common.” Meanwhile, he’s vetoed names I love (Florence, Ivy, Matilda) because he “knew a girl in school with that name and she was annoying.” 🙄

WWYD? Am I being unreasonable or is DH completely deluded?

P.S. Posting for traffic!

OP posts:
PickledElectricity · 21/01/2025 10:48

If he gets to veto your names then you get to veto his 🤷‍♀️ tell him to come up with a shortlist of names he likes and you'll review them.

You're the one who will be registering the birth so stand firm.

Mrsdyna · 21/01/2025 10:49

Don't do it, awful name!

toastofthetown · 21/01/2025 10:49

Spanglemum02 · 21/01/2025 10:46

Have you tried the Baby Names board? Agree with the PP who said there's some ageism on this thread. And some snobbery. Plus when I was a kid I couldn't imagine a 50 something Tracy but now I know several. Similarly when I was 18 in 1986 and first heard the name Joshua in a music hall song. I couldn't imagine anyone calling a child that. Some names are popular for a short spell and some names are more classic.

You just need to find something you both agree on.

In fairness, the Baby Name board is categorically not the place to get away from name snobbery.

Hazeby · 21/01/2025 10:49

It doesn’t matter what any of us think of any of your name choices. You don’t have to come on here to seek support and justify yourself - you don’t like it and that’s it. Same applies to him.

The only thing that’s non-negotiable is that you both have to like the name.

takealettermsjones · 21/01/2025 10:50

I wouldn't do it if I were you! I spend my life correcting the spelling and pronunciation of my name, as it's from a different culture. People giving their kids "unique" spellings on purpose is my pet piamh.

BaronessBomburst · 21/01/2025 10:50

I was just thinking what lovely names Ruth and Carol are, as mentioned by a PP.

Topseyt123 · 21/01/2025 10:50

Needmorelego · 21/01/2025 10:43

Could people stop using the word "chavvy".
It's horrible.

Horrible or not, it's true in the case of this name. It is the very definition of chavvy!

DalzielOrNoDalzielAndDontPascoe · 21/01/2025 10:50

Snowmanscarf · 21/01/2025 10:23

It’s not unique. Lots of girls are named it.

109th must points babe in 2923z

Mystic Meg, is that you?! [Grin]

NotAnotherBirthday · 21/01/2025 10:50

Pigsinblankets13 · 21/01/2025 10:28

Dds friend spells it Neve

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As does Neve Campbell, of course Smile

Embroideryemma · 21/01/2025 10:50

Grim. Avoid, avoid, avoid. This is why people should discuss baby names before they even get married!

Fencehedge · 21/01/2025 10:50

Eve / Yves?

Original poster
kweefa · 21/01/2025 10:51

Thank you, I couldn’t have put it better myself! You’re absolutely right. I don’t see why Nevaeh should be the exception just because it’s his idea. And the hypocrisy about popularity has really wound me up too.

I think he’s being completely unreasonable, and honestly, I’ve had enough of the double standards. I’m the one growing this baby, dealing with all the aches and exhaustion, and I still have to fight him over a name FFS!

OP posts:
TightlyLacedCorset · 21/01/2025 10:51

In about 30 years Nevaeh will become a classic. But for now it's associated with chav. Bit like the name Champagne for a girl.

I don't understand the need for Heaven to be reversed in order to be given as a name anyway. Surely you can just call the child 'heaven?' In Christian African and Carribbean communities they give the most conservative and literal Christian theologies as names without apology. Revelation, Blessing, Mercy, Trinity, Gospel, Anointed etc etc

Throw it back at him and say you'll agree to Heaven instead, as Nevaeh isn't religious enough and a bit anathema being spelt backwards. He'll change his mind quickish I bet.

MatriarchalMadness · 21/01/2025 10:52

Yes, he's deluded if he thinks Nevaeh is a good name.

Mrsdyna · 21/01/2025 10:52

If it's heaven backwards, isn't that a bit demonic? 😂

Enough4me · 21/01/2025 10:53

Eva is a pretty name and sounds similar. Or Evelyn in Eva.

flapjackfairy · 21/01/2025 10:53

Sceptical123 · 21/01/2025 10:40

As opposed to Oliver, where I taught 5 in one class once and it’s been in the top 5 of baby names for 2 decades! The snobbery on this thread is unreal

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I wasn't being snobby ! The OP s husband thinks it is a unique name ( as in no one else has ever thought of it ). And as I.have pointed out it isn't unique and has been around for a long time now.
I wasn't commenting on whether I like it or not . And yes Oliver has long been popular ! I don't get your point !

thesugarbumfairy · 21/01/2025 10:53

kweefa · 21/01/2025 10:27

That’s actually a lovely suggestion, thank you! I do like Niamh, but I’m worried about people constantly mispronouncing or misspelling it. We live in an area where Irish names aren’t very common, and I can just imagine her having to correct people all the time. Do you think it would be an issue, or am I overthinking it?

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I know a Niamh (shes 17) and there are no issues with pronunciation from anyone. Spelling - yes. But that can be corrected easily enough.

Fencehedge · 21/01/2025 10:54

Isn't it meant to be pronounced Nav-eh? Or Nu-vey-ah

DalzielOrNoDalzielAndDontPascoe · 21/01/2025 10:55

Doloresparton · 21/01/2025 10:31

Or Genna - that’s heaven in Maltese.

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If Nevaeh is Heaven backwards - which kind of makes it equivalent to Hell, why not Gehenna?!

Most of Anne Hegarty's name is Gehenna backwards!!

I also remember reading ages ago about the dad who was a huge football fan and fiercely loyal to 'his' team, who managed to convince his wife to call their DD Lanesra!

beAsensible1 · 21/01/2025 10:55

fine if you think neveah is chavvy, but Florence, ivy and Matilda are the names of every girl from here to bognor regis.

so neither of you are right. one a bit rubbish and 3 dull. someone upthread said Niamh which is nice

toastofthetown · 21/01/2025 10:55

I’m currently pregnant and dealing with all the comes with that, but I still want my husband to love our baby’s name. Naming a baby isn’t a reward for pregnancy and the name will (unless the child chooses to change it) last their life, so it’s something which you’ll both be saying a lot. You should be be allowed to veto names you don’t like. There are many other names than Nevaeh, Sophie, Amelia, Freya, Florence, Ivy, and Matilda that you both might agree on.

Fetburzswefg · 21/01/2025 10:55

Its an awful name, a shocker! Naff and overused. Stand seriously firm on this one. Let him know she’s never going to be Neveah and you won’t change your mind so he’d better start thinking of alternatives instead of waiting you out and hoping you’ll concede.

Are there similar sounding names you could agree on (Niamh, Eva, Ava, etc?) or is it the specific meaning of Neveah he is fixed on?

mindutopia · 21/01/2025 10:55

It also has a bit of a Satanic feel to me, writing any words backwards. It’s like some spooky thing teens would do before trying to do some kind of mock seance while stoned off their faces.

SpringleDingle · 21/01/2025 10:56

Terrible chavvy name!