To think that everyone faces storms in life, but eventually, the sun shines through?

Nope it's not true

But we have to believe that it might be to get us through the bad times

Not always true - yes, everything passes, but sometimes the ending is sad, not happy.

I think that pretty much all people deal with good and bad things simultaneously throughout life.

You're very fortunate if at any particular time the good outweighs the bad.

There really is a knack to enjoying whatever good things you can, no matter how tiny, no matter how bad things are.

But overall life is competitive, riddled with things that can bankrupt, hurt or kill you or those that you love, and it has been ever thus.

I think this is a really fair way of summing things up. I work hard at being positive but I have a very serious health condition which materially affects my life prospects. I still work hard at adapting but I do feel sad sometimes about how life has changed and will continue to change. If the health service had been functioning I would have had much better outcomes; as it was my diagnosis came much too late in the day and I missed the golden window for preventative treatment. I have had to get past my fury and sadness at this. But it 100% has decreased my optimism because my future is more frightening now.

I admire your optimism. I feel as though I used to think that way many years ago but as I've got older I've changed somewhat as life has dealt me its usual blows and thrown its own curve-balls.

These days I have decided that you just do have to learn to live with life's downers (bereavements, serious illness/injury etc.) as well as the rest of it. It's not easy and can feel relentless.

I used to hope for that, but for some people the hardship and misery is utterly unrelenting.

In films there's usually some type of resolution and maybe a happy ending but in real life it's often not the case.

@EmpressaurusKitty I'm sorry to hear about your mother. Totally understand what you are saying.

I've often wondered if the end in that statement John was talking about was death/afterlife because the religion I was raised in has an afterlife concept. He was quite influenced by those ideas. Also even if you don't believe in an afterlife, which I don't, I think about the end as he's describing it as an end to suffering. I suppose I've always taken it that way which gives that statement a darker reading.

I think some poor people just have a really shit time of it. Some of it can be avoided by having being bought up in a stable home with good self esteem and good decision making skills and confidence in yourself but some is unavoidable and when it rains is seems to pour.

I am fortunate enough to never have experienced anything bad, anything that could be deemed 'bad' was more of a fork in the road and required decision making and perseverance. My mum always says if I fell in a bucket of muck I'd come out smelling like roses.

The poor lady that lives behind me is the opposite, SA as a child, escaped a severely DV relationship ended up in a hostel with 2 children, one with significant disability, eventually got her self sorted and moved into her own house, had a house fire, unexpectedly pregnant at 48 then a breast cancer diagnosis which thankfully she survived. But the level of shit she has been dealt just isn't fair and her tunnel is unjustly long.

No.

Sorry this reminds me of people saying 'everything happens for a reason' which is so emptily dumb I just have to ignore it because nobody wants a rant.

Connecting with other people can make rough situations a bit better. I really admire my father in law, who has been diagnosed with terminal cancer and who has just lost his wife of 60 years after 6 years of dementia. He has of course had other bereavements including his son. He is doing his best to get out and see people, always asks how we are, looks for things to enjoy in life. None of it 'happened for a reason' and there is unlikely to be any sunshine 'at the end' but he is living his life as well as he can. That's reality.

No. I have incurable secondary breast cancer. I'm also suffering horrifically with menopause symptoms as a result of more cancer and a hysterectomy. I can assure you OP ( without being too pessimistic) that at some point, things won't end well!

I’d really like to think what we’re going through at the moment with our DD will change for the better, not sure how I could face each day if I didn’t tbh.

Or kidnapped from your home in Israel.

As I said in the thread that got pulled the other day - eventually there comes a new normal.

No

I think it does. It's a mindset. You just get used to your new circumstances, it's up to you if you're happy.

I think we all go through easy and hard times in life - it's inevitable that most of us will face bereavements and periods of ill health. Most of those periods will pass, and yes there will be light at the end of the tunnel - even if the other end of the tunnel looks a bit different to what went before.

That's not always going to be the case though - terminal illness, death of a child, war...

Absolutely hate that saying too! Like the kids that are abused happened for a reason is my retort. Also, "what's meant for you won't go by you" is another saying that really, really annoys me.

There are some who live fairly charmed lives and others who have lots of "bad luck" and incredibly difficult lives with continual, horrendous things happening to them, no reprieve for them until they die. Unfortunately, it's life, sad to say.

No

A 31 year old British horse rider chose to die by assisted suicide after suffering a devastating spine injury

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2024/03/25/injured-rider-tells-of-apparent-assisted-suicide-choice/

https://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2024-03-25/not-an-existence-i-want-rider-paralysed-in-fall-writes-poignant-farewell

This feels somewhat simplistic. The imagery of the sun shining through implies to me that once "the storm" is over that's now all behind you and everything is literally "rosy".

Sometimes (often?) this can be true. However, some situations that people find themselves in are truly horrific, and some people never really recover. To assume that of course they will recover one day, and everything will be sunny again, would be deeply insulting.

If a friend were in a deep, deep low, I would just support them where they are right now.

I used to think that, but after 5 years of going from one crisis to the next I'm still waiting for light at the end of the tunnel. In 5 years, I've lost a baby in the second trimester, lost my job, been diagnosed with a rare illness, DH has had 2 mental breakdowns (1 6 week stay in a psych hospital), my mum had cancer, a child diagnosed with autism (not a bad thing but added stress), and my DH has been sacked from his job. It's felt relentless and unfair. But I try to reframe it and think of the positives - financially no worries, mum survived cancer, despite my illness the prognosis is good, I'm healthy, my child us happy and in mainstream school. I also find appreciating the small things helps.

No, very often there is no light at all. We all die in the end so I wouldn't call that a great ending.
Unless you are religious and think that the light will be on the other side). I'm not.

Most of life's up and downs are decided before you are born. You might be born into wealth, in which case you are shielded from a lot of life's problems except poor health, or you might be born into poverty in a war torn country and in that case, the light will be so faint as to be practically invisible.

I can't think of anyone who actually thinks it will all come out right in the end.

I think that it's not objectively true that things always get better, OP, but I agree with you that as humans, sometimes the best we can do is find the beauty in life and appreciate the positives.

Sometimes I feel hopeless because my abusive ex is always in the background trying to harm or undermine me and take my daughter away just so he won't have to pay CMS (only when it suits him, of course). He has also assaulted my daughter and Social Services acted like we were both to blame. This has cost me an amazing amount of worry and legal fees. But I have an amazing partner and my daughter is a ray of sunshine. I try to remind myself how fortunate I have to live with this love and to have the opportunity to support my daughter through all of this.

This isn't the same as the terminal cancer diagnoses and I feel for people in this position - but we all have ongoing trials that can bring us down and life will be a misery if we don't find a way to focus on the things we have to be grateful for.

Nope, nope, nope. Sorry but for some people it's one crisis and tragedy after another, their whole lives and through no fault of their own. Life is often cruel and unfair to the bitter end.

It depends. If my entire family were wiped out (god forbid) I think I'd struggle to see the light.

I have been in some dire situations in a one-after-the-other way, spanning decades. Barely had chance to breathe. I've felt the lowest possible and had given up at one point, never thought I'd be happy again, turned my back on the world, gave up etc.
the sun did come back out. It surprised me.

Most of the time I think it's possible but there are certain situations where it's probably dark forever. Very sad. Life is hard.