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AIBU?

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Original poster

Need a hand hold part 2

968 replies

Imbluedalale · 02/11/2024 21:41

Hi it’s Laura ,
Just wanted to add a new thread as I think my other thread is getting full xx

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19
AdmittowearingCrocs · 03/11/2024 15:15

How lovely for you Laura, such a fabulous surprise. Enjoy every minute with her, take some photos to treasure and give her lots of hugs 😀

RaspberryBeretxx · 03/11/2024 15:06

Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 14:38

Hi @Ruralretreating are you ok?
I’ve just received the best news! My daughter is currently at the bus stop on her way to see me! I can’t wait to see her and hold her. My youngest was going to come too but he said he doesn’t feel too good and is really tired after his game so I’ve told him to get into bed , he said he feels bad but I told him not to and he must rest if he’s not feeling well. I really wanted to see him too but I don’t want him to be poorly. I’ve just tried to make myself as presentable as can be but I will be honest I don’t look great. I’ve got huge bags under my eyes and because my hair has been falling out I’ve got all stray bits at the front but I can’t wait to see her and smell her! lol oh I’m so excited xx

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That’s so amazing! I’m so so happy for you. Hope you have a really lovely visit and it gives you a big boost. Xx

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 14:38

Ruralretreating · 03/11/2024 14:29

Hi Laura! Just dropping in to see how you are and say I hope all goes well at hospital tomorrow.

Hi @Ruralretreating are you ok?
I’ve just received the best news! My daughter is currently at the bus stop on her way to see me! I can’t wait to see her and hold her. My youngest was going to come too but he said he doesn’t feel too good and is really tired after his game so I’ve told him to get into bed , he said he feels bad but I told him not to and he must rest if he’s not feeling well. I really wanted to see him too but I don’t want him to be poorly. I’ve just tried to make myself as presentable as can be but I will be honest I don’t look great. I’ve got huge bags under my eyes and because my hair has been falling out I’ve got all stray bits at the front but I can’t wait to see her and smell her! lol oh I’m so excited xx

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Ruralretreating · 03/11/2024 14:29

Hi Laura! Just dropping in to see how you are and say I hope all goes well at hospital tomorrow.

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 14:05

NeedWineNow · 03/11/2024 13:55

@Imbluedalale Thank you. Just a thought, but if you fancy a fun read this afternoon have a look at the Ye Olde Mumsnette posts on the Chat thread. It has made me and DH howl over the last few days 😂

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Oh I love those posts! I read one other day that a woman had posted as she’d got a mirror and looked ‘down there’ it was hilarious 😆 I’m going to have a read of them this afternoon xx

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Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 14:02

Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:52

Google says Outlander is on Netflix
I'll have a look for 'Maid'

I'm also and 'Handmaid's Tale' fan.
DH is not so keen on that one! Xx

I’ll add that to my list , thank you @Munchyseeds2 xx

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Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 14:01

Apolloneuro · 03/11/2024 13:51

@Munchyseeds2 is right. There’s research that proves that if you tell yourself positive things, they become true. I convinced myself that taking statins is a really positive thing for my health and didn’t have a single side effect. Obviously positive thinking can’t grow back a leg or make a blind person see, but you know what I mean.

Even if you can’t look in a mirror yet, say out loud one or two positive affirmations. Something like “I am worth caring for.” “I am strong and healthy.”

Thank you @Apolloneuro . I will give it a try.
I have started to tell myself things in my head like ‘I can get through this’ and ‘I will see my children soon’ and it does help (sometimes) xx

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spoonfulofmustard · 03/11/2024 13:57

NeedWineNow · 03/11/2024 13:55

@Imbluedalale Thank you. Just a thought, but if you fancy a fun read this afternoon have a look at the Ye Olde Mumsnette posts on the Chat thread. It has made me and DH howl over the last few days 😂

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ooh and the threads in classics are hilarious! great suggestion@NeedWineNow

NeedWineNow · 03/11/2024 13:55

Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:52

Sounds like a perfect afternoon @NeedWineNow I hope you enjoy every minute of it xx

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@Imbluedalale Thank you. Just a thought, but if you fancy a fun read this afternoon have a look at the Ye Olde Mumsnette posts on the Chat thread. It has made me and DH howl over the last few days 😂

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:52

NeedWineNow · 03/11/2024 13:51

@Imbluedalale All good thank you! Went .out for a walk to get some milk this morning and am now installed on the sofa in front of the telly. A lazy afternoon beckons.

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Sounds like a perfect afternoon @NeedWineNow I hope you enjoy every minute of it xx

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Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:52

Google says Outlander is on Netflix
I'll have a look for 'Maid'

I'm also and 'Handmaid's Tale' fan.
DH is not so keen on that one! Xx

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:51

Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:46

He did a right number on you didn't he?? 😥
❤xx

Yeah he did unfortunately but I blame myself too in parts . I forgave him a lot for the cheating in the first few years which I shouldn’t have done so he knew he could treat me like dirt from then xx

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Apolloneuro · 03/11/2024 13:51

@Munchyseeds2 is right. There’s research that proves that if you tell yourself positive things, they become true. I convinced myself that taking statins is a really positive thing for my health and didn’t have a single side effect. Obviously positive thinking can’t grow back a leg or make a blind person see, but you know what I mean.

Even if you can’t look in a mirror yet, say out loud one or two positive affirmations. Something like “I am worth caring for.” “I am strong and healthy.”

NeedWineNow · 03/11/2024 13:51

Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:13

Hi @NeedWineNow how are you today?
Thank you for supporting me I’m very grateful 🙏 xx

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@Imbluedalale All good thank you! Went .out for a walk to get some milk this morning and am now installed on the sofa in front of the telly. A lazy afternoon beckons.

Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:46

He did a right number on you didn't he?? 😥
❤xx

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:45

It sounds really good! Is it on Netflix?
I love getting hooked on series . Have you ever watched ‘maid’? It’s about a young woman with a little girl and she’s in an abusive relationship and she decides to leave and she has nothing so she becomes a maid . It was really good.
And also ‘dead to me’ was really good too , it’s about two women who become best friends xx

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Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:41

Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:29

It's really easy to get some dust or fluff in the charging port that is enough to stop it working, I blow on mine quite often.

As far as believing in yourself....every morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself over and over, (out loud) that you are a good person and why ( caring, funny, loveable etc)
You will feel a bit daft for sure but no will hear you!!
It helps to re programme the brain❤xx

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Hi @Munchyseeds2 ,
At the moment I can’t look at myself in the mirror even when I brush my teeth I have to look down . My mental health team are working on that with me and once I’m settled they are going to put me on a self esteem workshop . But once I’m able to I will definitely try that . Thank you @Munchyseeds2 xx

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Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:39

Oh you need to try outlander!
It's a time traveller love story set in Scotland/USA spanning 100s of years
I eas hooked after the first couple of episodes
Just a little word of warning....the 2nd to last episode of season one is VERY dark and brutal. ..if you like it and get that far it might be better to just read an outline rather than watch it! Xx
Ps dreams are away of your mind coming to terms with all that has happened, the medication you are taking might also make you dream more

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:37

spoonfulofmustard · 03/11/2024 12:47

you are NOT a bad person, even the tamest cat will fight back when continually baited. You are doing amazingly and you're children will see how strong you have been xx

Thank you spoonfulofmustard,
That means a lot. I did actually fight back a few times (not psychically) but then ex would get his phone out and record me when he pushed me over the edge. So I stopped fighting back in the end xx

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Munchyseeds2 · 03/11/2024 13:29

Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 12:43

Hi PeggyMitchellsCameo,
How are you?
I’ve just spent the last 3 hours trying to charge my phone , my charger wasn’t working but then started to thankfully. Is it just me or does anyone else blow into their phone if something is wrong with it?
Wow . Your friend’s story is very inspirational. I’m so pleased to hear she got her life back and is now helping other people look for the signs of DV. She sounds like a very strong woman!
I too have started to write things down, I have many notes in my notebook on my phone and lots of lists. I even have a list of everything ex did so when I falter a little bit I can read that and remind myself what he was like and what he said/did to me.
Sometimes in my darkest hours I do think I’m a terrible person , I think I must be and when your told multiple times that you are you do start to believe it but it’s hidden deep inside me at the moment but I do know deep deep down that I’m not xx

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It's really easy to get some dust or fluff in the charging port that is enough to stop it working, I blow on mine quite often.

As far as believing in yourself....every morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself over and over, (out loud) that you are a good person and why ( caring, funny, loveable etc)
You will feel a bit daft for sure but no will hear you!!
It helps to re programme the brain❤xx

Apolloneuro · 03/11/2024 13:29

Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:21

Hi Apolloneuro,
How’s your weekend going?xx

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Good my darling. Xxx

Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:29

ChoccieCornflake · 03/11/2024 11:45

Morning all!

Hi @ChoccieCornflake
How are you? Any plans for today?xx

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Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:28

spoonfulofmustard · 03/11/2024 11:29

Ava and I are here cheering you on xx

Afternoon @spoonfulofmustard and Ava ❤️
Hope your having a lovely day xx

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Original poster
Imbluedalale · 03/11/2024 13:24

AdmittowearingCrocs · 03/11/2024 11:07

Morning tribe 🌝 Hope you slept well Laura and have/are enjoying a lovely breakfast. Bit dull and murky here but I bet that lake looks lovely whatever the weather. 🌺

Hi @AdmittowearingCrocs
I didn’t sleep well nor did I have any breakfast lol 😂 I’m all cookied out too so no more cookies for today. I’m looking forward to going to Tesco to get some healthy food.
It’s dull here today too, loads of walkers around the lake though. It’s a very nice view, I keep thinking it looks like an ice rink xx

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