Is this not looking after myself?

I think you at least need a pair of shoes and a nightie/pyjamas. Also maybe a pair of trousers and another couple of tops. Then next month say a pair of trainers and the month after a pair of boots and a jacket.

I had hardly any clothes when I bought my first home as a single person and wore the same black trousers on a night out for a long time. For work I bought a few supermarket smart clothes which were fine. But you do need more!

Also, of your mum is well off and worried about that, has she offered any financial help to pay the debt off/ get a mortgage, if she can afford it? I know it can be hard to accept help as an adult child but it's a lot more common than you think.

It's very odd and it feeds into the narrative that you are in debt and still renting.

You earn well but do you feel poor? Because this is exactly how I would feel in your position.

Set yourself a monthly clothing budget and buy yourself a few things. They don't need to cost a lot. I find lots of lovely things in charity shops. My favourite one sells items for around £2.50.

I'm a minimalist/ against excessive consumption. I consume high quality, long lasting, ethically made items in low quantities. For example I own 7 pairs of socks, 7 pairs of knickers, 3 PJ sets, 1 coat etc, and replace them when they are knackered, but don't increase the quantity. People think I am well dressed as my items stand out, but when they find out how little I own, they think I'm a bit nuts.

However even to me your situation sounds a bit extreme. What if your 1 pair of jeans gets ripped and other bottoms are in the wash? If you've had an intervention, it really must be quite bad. People at work wouldn't tell you. You do notice of someone turns up in the same pair of jeans every single day.

I presume you are in London/ another high cost location?

If you're worried about money, make a proper budget. On 3.7K, I'd like to hope that you are paying off 1K+ of the debt monthly. Is it possible for you to reduce the interest rate to 0/ lower rate? Are you saving as well? Saving rates usually aren't that great compared to interest rates, so would recommend paying off debt over saving too much.

Regarding clothing, what do you like?

Even premium high street brands like Reiss, Ralph Lauren, Me&Em etc sell for very little on Vinted. If you don't want used stuff (although much of it is with tags on!), have a look at sales (now on). Again, I'm not sure about your likes and budgets at all, but if you prefer nicer stuff, put 100 GBP aside to buy something every 3 months. That's 33 pounds a month, the cost of a few days' commute... Surely you can afford that if you think about it?

That doesn't sound remotely practical in terms of washing or being physically comfortable for the season. Surely the cost of running the washing machine all the time is more than just buying a few extra items so you can do fewer loads?

I’d hang fire just a little while until mid-winter weight things are in the shops since we’re already in August.
Do you have a presentable/practical coat?
I suggest you go somewhere like Sainsbury’s for the Tu range and you pick up perhaps four or five separates items that you can mix and match colour-wise and that will increase the options quite a bit.
I understand your concern about the debt but a little too n some clothes a couple of times a year isn’t going to make much difference; I even wonder if your letting your ex still kind of rule your life a bit thinking you don’t deserve more or you have stint yourself to get away from the relationship or something.

Depends if you're happy with your clothes or not. I would find that few clothes miserable, but it's perfectly adequate if you're not bothered.
I've been loving thrift+ recently to replenish my post kids wardrobe though. Really cheap.

I have a wardrobe and many drawers of clothes and still have a circular of 3 outfits I feel comfortable in. You do you and ignore anyone else

Fair enough. I hope you are prioritising clearing the debt. As I said, I am not fussed myself about clothes.

Supermarkets have lovely things in and they’re cheap.

I honestly don’t know how you survive on so few clothes! Don’t you get ridiculously bored of the same few things over and over?

What do you wear to work where neither jeans or running trousers would be acceptable?!

Julia-simple-styling on Instagram does good capsule wardrobe style ups.

Perhaps add some basics (t shirts, vests etc) in neutral colours to give you more options with your basics. Tesco and Asda get nice things in that won’t break the bank. I think it’s easy to get into a rut.

If you were my friend or sister, I would worry about you.

I think it’s interesting which questions you’re choosing to answer and which you’re ignoring.

I suspect this is going to end up as one of those threads where a lot of posters get over invested and then tell the OP off because they’re frustrated.

I am also curious as to how OP ended up with 20k in debt when she spends so little on herself while earning a very respectable salary. There was another thread a few months back where a woman didn't buy herself any clothes but was spending all the money in the world on her daughter. I wonder if this is the same OP. If this is the case, then it seems indeed unreasonable.

You need a few more bits so you can at least rotate a few outfits for occasions, seasons etc. Charity shops, vinted etc can be such a great way to invest in more items for less.

I admire your minimalist approach and if you are happy dont spend what you dont want to....however all I'm thinking is surely those limited outfits must equal them constantly being washed and becoming washed out or faded looking?
As others hav said vinted is fab, outlets have great bargains and lots of high St stores have sales on. I bought 2 tops in matalan sale today for £16. My dad got 2 t shirts in m&s for £10.
An odd treat or even £100 could double the size of your wardrobe and won't greatly impact your level of debt

I don’t even have one pair of jeans! I have invested though in some really solid wardrobe basics from M&S and from Vinted which allow a capsule wardrobe of many outfits from just a few basic items (plus the few items I’ve had since the late 90’s that are still going strong!)

I invested in some wide leg trousers in black and Navy (neutrals wash me out!) and about 7/8 different tops to wear with them, including t-shirts, sleeveless tops, loose shirts. And I wear them with a pair of Stan Smith trainers from Vinted for £10 or Birkenstock dupes from M&S for £25 - if I’m wearing for a work meeting I’ll add a blazer to smarten it up (Vinted again for £4) or a cardi if more casual

I also invested in some wrap style midi dresses (suit me more now I’m over 40 and more curvy!) which again I got mostly from Vinted in a few different colours & prints and can also be paired with trainers or sandals and a blazer to be more smart.

but I still think that if you are happy and comfortable and confident in your clothes now then don’t let your mothers comments bother you.

my mum likes to remind me every time I see her that I used to be so slim and now I have a huge bottom!!

At least buy some decent shoes - come on you must earn over £55k before tax and deductions and you are wearing £9 shoes from Tesco? That is a false economy.

This.

But someone choosing to live with a minimalist wardrobe is very different from someone who doesn't feel they deserve to buy themselves even the basics.

OP unless this comes from a minimalist lifestyle choice, I think another pair of jeans, some smart trousers, and tops, nightwear, underwear for a week or so would be necessities even if you are in debt. Also coat and a couple of pairs of shoes.

there are a lot of questions.. £3700 take home is a lot of money! it would depend on what you are spending your money on?

i'm curious to know why you've got to adulthood with only so few clothes? is this a choice?

No I disagree with your mother that you are notnlooking after yourself. As long as you are actually wearing clothes and they aren't threadbare and don't smell then that's fine. Your choice if you want to be a total martyr to saving money.

You must have the washing machine on all the time?