Is this not looking after myself?

I agree that styles have changed a bit and I also have got rid of the shorter, more fitted dresses I was wearing to work 10 years ago.

but many of my younger work colleagues are still wearing skinny jeans. And there is a big difference between;

• having clothes that are all “on trend”; and
• just having 6 or 7 items of clothes and nothing else!

Surely there is a middle ground.

Then again I don’t mind being labelled a 40 year old millennial, because that’s exactly what I am and I’m not embarrassed by it.

I still wear my skinny jeans 🤷🏻‍♀️. I don’t care if ‘noone else wears them’, I like them.

For example, I have only been able to afford one loose/wide leg pair of jeans

What is your sort of budget? Have you looked at vinted... sometimes people sell items for £1! I got a lovely linen dress for £1...ok postage pushed it up but it still came to under a fiver. You can even get new stuff on there for a very low price

@Hadtohide Not as much as you would think, as a lot of it is very dated or no longer suits me.

For example, I have only been able to afford one loose/wide leg pair of jeans, although I possess a few pairs of skinny ones, which no one wears now.

Also, I used to wear fitted dresses, and while I am still slim, post having my son, my arse is smaller and my stomach muscles are less tight, so these no longer look good on me, and again, no one really seems to wear this style anymore.

I am not obsessed with keeping up with trends, but I don't want to wear clothes that scream 40 year old millennial either.

@PinkPolkadotFlamingo i understand that you might not have money to spend on clothes now but surely you must have quite a few things from pre DC times?

i enjoy buying new things (often not new but on vinted) but if I had to I could probably wear current clothes for at least the next 10 years.

I am not quite as extreme as you OP, but I do have a pretty limited wardrobe at the moment due to full-time nursery fees. If I spent money on new clothes, I would have no money for days out, etc and that's a bigger priority at the moment. As soon as DS (nearly 3) is in primary school, I'll have a serious wardrobe upgrade, but I'd rather look a bit of a mess and actually have spare cash to do things in the interim.

@Salagaee In answer to your question, no. I'd say you're not looking after yourself. Are DD's needs met? Do you both shower regularly and have 3 meals a day? Is your house clean? These are also factors

I am going to guess that other people in ops life have noticed this...they are just too polite to mention it.

Good advice and enjoy your clothes!😁

Wouldn't life be easier to have at least enough clothes to last for one week without washing? I can't imagine all the washing required to actually stay clean with so few items.

Not far off the OP. I don't have two dresses that she has. And if I didn't have a lifestyle that requires wellies and walking boots, I would have two pairs of footwear as she does. She works in an office, I don't. If you love clothes and shopping for them, by all means buy loads of them and enjoy it. If it isn't something that interests you, why do more than the minimum just to assuage societal expectations. I expect the OP's mother is more concerned with how she herself is judged by her daughter appearance than any actual worry about self-care. eg If my children behave badly in public, it reflects poorly on my parenting (or lack thereof).

Oh come on, stop being pedantic. Small minimalist wardrobe is one thing. As Bobton describes. But only 1 pair of shoes is extremist. Martyrdom for the love of it.

If you have a few cheap clothes but they are appropriate and clean that seems OK to me as you are on a tight budget.

Are you taking good care of your physical and mental health? Do you go to the dentist regularly for instance?

I have lots clothes but I only wear the same number of items OP describes

Because she's sleeping in her day clothes and her loved ones are worried she is not looking after herself. If she were happy to sleep naked then no one would be suggesting PJs.

Are you sure you are keeping your clothes clean , could that be what your mum meant about not looking after yourself?

No , I wouldn't be happy with that amount of clothes.
For your mum to notice and actually say something would concern me.
One pair of jeans would wear out quickly.
There must be some things you like somewhere.

But that's a good basic wardrobe and exactly what the OP doesn't have at the moment.

I do think you need a decent pair of shoes. It’s not good for you to wear flip flops or cheap shoes with no support all year round.

Op does wear something in bed - a t shirt!

You can get a nightie in Asda for £8.

Whilst I think the OP should have a little more in her wardrobe, and would be able to do this quite economically, I don't get this obsession with pyjamas (several PPs have mentioned them).

I never wear anything in bed, so I own one (unworn) pair of pyjamas in case I stay in someone's house (which I don't do!).

If I were OP I'd buy a few things to wear during the day, not faff about buying a wardrobe of (irritating to sleep in) nightwear.

Get some decent shoes. The cost of physio/rehab equipment and orthotics when (not if, when) you go over on your ankle due to the complete absence of biomechanical support will be well over 40 years' worth of cheap shit footwear.

There's nothing wrong with a small wardrobe if it suits you!

I have a lot of clothes but in reality I only cycle between 2-3 outfits in summer and another 2-3 outfits in the winter under my coat. During COVID I lived in a hot country and I literally only used three dresses (2 of which were identical), a pair of sandals and a few stay at home bits. It's nice not to have to think about what you want to wear.

You only wear 2 dresses and one pair of shoes to work, to the office. No. This can't be.