To think the hilarity just wasn’t necessary?

@DonnySue carry on being you. I’m a bit of a reflector and value taking time to do so. Unfortunately as a lot of responses show on this thread there is low/poor tolerance of it or of difference. I regularly need breaks in social situations. My family would never take the mick out of me for having an interest. Unfortunately you’ve just got lots of people on this thread who don’t understand having an interest and can’t stretch their brains far enough to understand it because they are too restricted by societal norms eg groups should stay together not one leave for a while and come back, or laugh at the weirdo. People who lack confidence can’t cope with an independent thinker. Boring pack behaviour and sounds like your sister, like many posters on this thread, are comfortable with a bit of low key bullying to have a laugh.

Carry on doing you and the next time they laugh at you like that just leave. Set the boundary for yourself and others that you won’t be treated like that. They’ll call you weird and tell you you’re overreacting but you won’t be in the same room as them so win win.

There was nothing wrong with what you did at all. You're a thinker. Your sister clearly isn't, and is perhaps a bit of a bully too.

So am I getting this right - you were talking about history, then the conversation naturally drifted into American politics, you didn't want to talk about that so removed yourself to reflect on the previous conversation. However politely you feel you did this, it would be somewhere between weird and rude to me. Then you came back and tried to keep steering the conversation back to history, even though it had already moved on - AND you had literally taken yourself off outside for a period - and even though you know your sister isn’t massively into history? No wonder she was ribbing you - your behaviour was really odd and her making fun was probably a way of ensuring the conversation wasn’t dominated by a topic that had already been discussed and was only of interest to one of you

The polite thing to do would have been to reflect on your thoughts at a natural break in the conversation, rather than making one yourself and leaving everyone wondering WTF you were “just popping out” for. Surely you could have discussed it with your Grandma again at a later point, rather than trying to drag the conversation back at that moment? Perhaps when your sister wasn’t around, given her lack of interest in the topic?

I LOVE this OP!

You have actually inspired me to make the time to do this.

Of course not. I have had the most insightful and thoughful conversations with very ordinary people with no pretentions to being intellectuals at all. We all love football/cricket, Tv shows and pop music too. But dont you think it is odd that so many posters take umbrage at the word "reflect" and seem to have ringfenced it as an activity for the autistic or the philosopher? Does that not itself reveal a rather middle aged serf mentality? To bring the topic back to OP's interest. 😛

I don't think you did anything weird or wrong - I quite like the idea of going off to quietly reflect on a conversation or topic of interest. I guess the way you put it might have sounded a bit odd to your 9 year old, and perhaps she relayed it to the others in an amusing way. Maybe she'll learn something from this, even if it's not immediately obvious. Hope you can move on and rise above it.

Well no - it’s rude to just get up mid conversation because it’s moved on from the topic you like. They all sat there listening to OP twaddle on AND she tried to bring the conversation back to what she wanted even though it had clearly moved on. Rude, ignorant and boring.

They were a little unkind but that is pretty funny. Sorry eek

My family don’t do this.

DH’s family don’t do this.

🤷‍♀️

I don’t see being interested in this as weird either.

But then I am interested in a lot of things. I like that about myself. I hang out with people who like to think, reflect and discuss too.

There’s a lot of undertone of ‘I’m proud to be a bit thick, don’t take myself to seriously, but do take seriously policing what I think should be normal’ on this thread.

Only read page 1, but really disagree.

I’d admire you OP. I admire people who stop and think. So many people just jump in to conversations, determine to impose their views on others, rather than reflecting and thinking about what is being said.

And you are with family, where you should be comfortable.

Your family were pretty shitty to laugh at you. I suspect they don’t reflect much.

The world would be a lot better if they was a lot more reflecting and a lot less grabbing at reasons to laugh at other.

You keep on being you OP.

Fascinated by the people claiming you can’t think and reflect in a busy room and suggesting that not wanting to repeatedly return to a conversation no one else was interested in makes you a pitiful character whose interest start and stop with soaps and socials.

I’m not an academic so not at the forefront of intelligent and original thinking but I’ve got a masters and I’m a qualified lawyer, I think on my feet, in crowded court rooms and I’ve written a couple of books and contributed to several more. I would have roared with laughter if my brothers or sisters had done this.

but is suspect the difference is I like them, they like me, none of us have a superiority complex and we all recognise that it’s not appropriate to hog a conversation.

Sister was trying to change the subject

Can't honestly blame her...
In her place, not sure I'd have laughed, but I'd certainly have rolled my eyes. Hard.

As others have said, bit pomous the take you out of that kind of conversation to "reflect".

Well, it is quite weird….

Op, you said it was drifting to trump and didn’t wish to discuss him, and also you wanted to keep talking about history, is that why you left, so you could go outside and basically continue the conversation in your own head?

It is an unusual thing to do, there's no sense in denying it, but that doesn't mean it's ok to laugh at you about it.

Your family should know you, understand you and accept you. Mocking you is unnecessary.

There is, I agree. But liking more intellectual pursuits and enjoying intelligent discussion doesn't mean you can't also like popular things like football. Or that you are automatically an intellectual if you don't like popular stuff.

Reflect is what philosophers do, think is what we mortal normal people do. Or go to France where réfléchir is used as thinking about mundane things as well:)

How strange to think that reflection is not for the great unwashed, the lesser mortals. That you need higher degrees or possibly a cave up in the mountains as accessories before you can do so. What was all that mindfullness crap in schools about then?

This.

To be honest, it does sound a bit pretentious to go away to "reflect". I wouldn't have laughed but I would have thought it odd. When hearing something interesting I usually "store it away" to think about later rather than going away to reflect. It sounds like something Socrates would do and that's why they were laughing. If I were you I would use the verbe think when speaking to my daughter or her school mates will find her pompous if she goes off to "reflect". So choice of verbs here really. Reflect is what philosophers do, think is what we mortal normal people do. Or go to France where réfléchir is used as thinking about mundane things as well:)

You be you, OP. Take an passionate interest interest in something beyond the here and now, reflect (yeah the horror of it!) as much as you want.The vast majority of people are idiots are shown by the replies here and by your relatives' behaviour. They would rather invest countless hours of conversation to hen parties and cheating bfs. Anything deeper is "pretentious and attention seeking", they would never write such scathing things if you had said you were neurodiverse or some such shit. That's the world we live in.

The word “reflect” makes you sound a bit pretentious and it’s rude to leave the room because the conversation has moved away from your preferred topic and then try and push the topic back when you return. It’s all a bit performative. You can think about anything at anytime.

She didn’t say you’re ashamed to be British, OP.

No need for hilarity at all. It's perfectly reasonable to want a bit of quiet thinking time, away from others.

You called it what it was, but many people would do the same thing by a different name - going for a breath of fresh air, 'having a look at the garden' or even going out for a cigarette if they were a smoker - there are many codes for wanting a short time alone when you are in company.