Page 3 | DD6’s party, Jemima’s mother and the clownfairy part 2

Endoftheroad12345 · 2024-06-18T02:44:44+00:00

Hi all After my last post here [[https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5097890-to-tell-a-mum-of-a-guest-that-she-cant-stay-at-dd6s-birthday-party?page=1 https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5097890-to-tell-a-mum-of-a-guest-that-she-cant-stay-at-dd6s-birthday-party?page=1]] I thought some of you might be interested in an update. The clown/fairy I had booked ghosted me when I tried to confirm!!!! so for a moment there I was panicking about having no entertainer and felt that the mumsnet curse of hoping that DD had a shitty party would come true!!!!! luckily though, I have found and booked a back up fairy. So that mitigates the clown phobia risk 9 guests have RSVPed if a total of 12 invites (I had guessed 15), 3 TBC. Of the 12, I know 6 mothers (most of them just to say hi to at school). 3 who have RSVPed I couldn’t pick out of a line up. So far no other parents have asked to stay. Or indeed asked for any other details (or an “plan”)about the party. Forecast is for pissing rain on Sunday. The last few pages of the thread took a weird turn while I was asleep and started talking about swimming parties and lifeguards. We do actually have a pool … (I know I sound like I’m trolling at this point.) There will not be a lifeguard on duty, but as it’s about 12 degrees here so I don’t think anyone will be getting in the unheated pool. (Am WFH today because DS has a high fever and power-chucked in the hallway last night while I was making cupcakes at 10pm for the sodding school fundraiser. As DS coughed in my face while he spreadeagled across my bed, I did think wistfully of one poster on the last thread who thought I was probably a cashed up career woman who barely saw her kids.)

Daisy1457 · 19/06/2024 06:22

flossie232 · 18/06/2024 14:33

@Daisy1457 you sound way meaner than the op. And at least she's funny with it.

'Way meaner' ?
That's quite comical actually 😁

I've not been at all mean, I've stated facts. The OP has been rude, can't give a straight answer, over the top and, like many others on here, is nothing more than a piss taker. I'm all up for a laugh and joke, but not when there's pure nastiness involved, as there is on this thread in particular .
So many posters seem oblivious to the fact that I'm not saying that every parent should stay to help out (just one would be fine), and act as if I'm stupid to point out that it's not really ok to look after 15 kids alone. ( I'm saying 15 as that's what the original plan was ).

I'd bet that the piss takers on here would agree with me if they weren't sat behind a key board anonymously. It amazes me just how vile people can be when no one knows who they are. To spew such crap just shows the mentality of some people.

LiberteEgaliteBeyonce · 18/06/2024 21:51

Nanny0gg · 18/06/2024 18:08

He won't come

She's cancelled the cheque

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Just as well, cheques can be forged. Safety first and that.

Delphiniumandlupins · 18/06/2024 21:22

I wish you hadn't mentioned your pool! You reminded me that I once hosted a full class swimming party for my DD. Hired a local pool (no lifeguard). Realised a bit late in the day that just having myself and DH minding 30 kids was possibly not enough so roped in a couple of friends to help. All fine except for the child who forgot/didn't know he couldn't swim (?) and jumped straight into the pool, at the deep end. DH spotted that he probably wasn't playing the third time he popped up and sank again.

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 21:03

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:55

I love this idea, it also negates the need for a lifeguard so that’s saving OP money too. Can there be some form of fire? Not to close to the vomitatrium though because we all know what that would smell like! Maybe the children could Spartan kick each other of the garage roof? Might need a builder though if OP doesn’t already have a garage

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Definitely a fire. If we have it at the solstice we would be required to have one anyway.

I'm assuming the medic handing out the tetanus shots can do a bit of first aid after the spartan kicks so that will be fine.

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:55

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 20:23

I'm thinking a Roman theme so chariots, gladiator outfits including real swords, lions, horses etc. The pool could be emptied out to form the colosseum. We just need to figure out which room will be the vomitarium for the party.

The project may slip slightly while we are training the lions.

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I love this idea, it also negates the need for a lifeguard so that’s saving OP money too. Can there be some form of fire? Not to close to the vomitatrium though because we all know what that would smell like! Maybe the children could Spartan kick each other of the garage roof? Might need a builder though if OP doesn’t already have a garage

notyourmummy · 18/06/2024 20:53

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:51

Oh my god that’s brutal (and hilarious) 😂

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I know!! Just seemed natural to me I guess, we were self sufficient so I knew all the animals were there for food!!

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:51

notyourmummy · 18/06/2024 20:28

At my 6th birthday party we went out to feed the lambs in our garden. At my 7th birthday party, I asked who wanted to see the lambs...then took my soon to be horrified friends to the chest freezer..."here they are, we're having lamb burgers on the BBQ..."

Oh my god that’s brutal (and hilarious) 😂

notyourmummy · 18/06/2024 20:28

At my 6th birthday party we went out to feed the lambs in our garden. At my 7th birthday party, I asked who wanted to see the lambs...then took my soon to be horrified friends to the chest freezer..."here they are, we're having lamb burgers on the BBQ..."

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 20:23

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:12

I think we need to think bigger than a big standard 6 year old party… I wonder what we could do to liven it up a bit? Does anyone work in a firework factory? Could we perhaps get a hot air balloon for the kids to dangle out of? We’ve got until December 2025 so I think we could make something really great here if we all club together (with the Project Managers approval of course).

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I'm thinking a Roman theme so chariots, gladiator outfits including real swords, lions, horses etc. The pool could be emptied out to form the colosseum. We just need to figure out which room will be the vomitarium for the party.

The project may slip slightly while we are training the lions.

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 20:12

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:56

So a normal 6 year old party then.

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I think we need to think bigger than a big standard 6 year old party… I wonder what we could do to liven it up a bit? Does anyone work in a firework factory? Could we perhaps get a hot air balloon for the kids to dangle out of? We’ve got until December 2025 so I think we could make something really great here if we all club together (with the Project Managers approval of course).

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:57

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:49

A perverse part of me is hoping that there is some sort of Incident at the party. Not enough to spoil it for DD or so that anyone gets hurt, but enough for plot development for this thread and to give the naysayers some validation. I’m good like that. Or perhaps I have munchausen’s syndrome .

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Just wait until you're cleaning the vomit and pony poo out of the pool. You'll be sorry then.

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:56

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 19:40

The door to the pony portaloo was blocked by the some random woman who was just stood watching as OP struggled past carrying food, turns out the clown fairy is allergic to horse hair and had a sneezing fit which resulted in Tarquin and Jemima getting knocked into the unfenced pool. They’d just done a piñata filled with sweets, nails and safety pins so threw up and bled all over the pool. I think someone was handing out free tetanus jabs though so they should be fine after a bit of Savlon 👍🏻

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So a normal 6 year old party then.

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:54

VanGoSunflowers · 18/06/2024 19:34

I’m not sure how our resident project manager will feel about this. She is already scheduling the party to be delivered ten days late

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That's ok. We all know what 10 days late really means. I have until at least December 2025.

Original poster

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:49

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 19:40

The door to the pony portaloo was blocked by the some random woman who was just stood watching as OP struggled past carrying food, turns out the clown fairy is allergic to horse hair and had a sneezing fit which resulted in Tarquin and Jemima getting knocked into the unfenced pool. They’d just done a piñata filled with sweets, nails and safety pins so threw up and bled all over the pool. I think someone was handing out free tetanus jabs though so they should be fine after a bit of Savlon 👍🏻

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A perverse part of me is hoping that there is some sort of Incident at the party. Not enough to spoil it for DD or so that anyone gets hurt, but enough for plot development for this thread and to give the naysayers some validation. I’m good like that. Or perhaps I have munchausen’s syndrome .

OP posts:

Original poster

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:46

Baklavamama · 18/06/2024 15:02

OP as a kiwi living in London I’ve been chuckling as people’s responses to your thread. It really highlights the cultural differences…(and house size difference. And that having a pool is pretty normal). Don’t mention that we all go barefoot in summer and that the kids often take their shoes off at school to play - if you’re in Auckland or further north that is. Not quite sure where the shoes off to play outside dividing line is any more!

Lol yes. My boyfriend is German and he cannot get used to the fact that my kids never want to wear shoes and would (and do sometimes when I can’t be bothered arguing) walk around anywhere in bare feet e.g. the supermarket. Don’t get him started on the wandering around with wet hair. 😂

The kids generally keep their shoes on at school now as they have a uniform but the amount of shoes lost at crèche was unreal - they just never keep them on, even in mid winter. Little hobos

OP posts:

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 19:40

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:30

I'm just wondering how the kids vomit and pony poop ended up in the pool. If there was a lifeguard on duty he/she could ensure the ponies formed an orderly queue for the pony portaloo.

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The door to the pony portaloo was blocked by the some random woman who was just stood watching as OP struggled past carrying food, turns out the clown fairy is allergic to horse hair and had a sneezing fit which resulted in Tarquin and Jemima getting knocked into the unfenced pool. They’d just done a piñata filled with sweets, nails and safety pins so threw up and bled all over the pool. I think someone was handing out free tetanus jabs though so they should be fine after a bit of Savlon 👍🏻

VanGoSunflowers · 18/06/2024 19:34

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:28

Ooh, you're good.

I'm still doing the meta analysis of 6 year old birthday parties, with a particular focus on mayhem and mishaps. I just need to narrow down my search parameters as I'm currently getting a lot of material on clown related tragedies.

Once I get the application for the research grant in and sort out the research assistants, I'm good to go. I should have the data analysed by October 2025.

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I’m not sure how our resident project manager will feel about this. She is already scheduling the party to be delivered ten days late

Original poster

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:32

Meanwhile I’m reverse judgey that people have unfenced swimming pools in the UK.

Mine pretty much have free reign in the pool now as both good swimmers and it’s in direct line of sight from the kitchen but trying to keep them alive as crawling babies would have been a nightmare if it was unfenced

OP posts:

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:30

Denialisagirlsbestfriend · 18/06/2024 18:43

As the party DGSA can you advise OP on the best way to transport the kids vomit, pony poop and the chemicals from the none guarded pool? I work in the haz waste industry so we could maybe work in tandem on this project 🤔

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I'm just wondering how the kids vomit and pony poop ended up in the pool. If there was a lifeguard on duty he/she could ensure the ponies formed an orderly queue for the pony portaloo.

Original poster

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:29

Riversideandrelax · 18/06/2024 19:18

Exactly. According to you in NZ most parents will drop off (same as where I am in the UK!) so is it really likely 20 parents will want to stay?? It's one person!

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which is worse bc I couldn’t just get on with party organising and leave her to other parents to chat - I’d have to entertain her (well, I know people will say I don’t HAVE to, but I would feel like I did. Rampant people pleasing and attention seeking tendencies!!!!)

OP posts:

OchonAgusOchonOh · 18/06/2024 19:28

VanGoSunflowers · 18/06/2024 18:56

Simple. As a bare minimum, OP should have a medical professional on standby that will deliver tetanus shots to each child as they arrive.
Said medical professional can then be on hand to deal with the plethora of emergencies that are certain to happen because there is only one adult and a clown/fairy there

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Ooh, you're good.

I'm still doing the meta analysis of 6 year old birthday parties, with a particular focus on mayhem and mishaps. I just need to narrow down my search parameters as I'm currently getting a lot of material on clown related tragedies.

Once I get the application for the research grant in and sort out the research assistants, I'm good to go. I should have the data analysed by October 2025.

Original poster

Endoftheroad12345 · 18/06/2024 19:27

Justsewsew · 18/06/2024 17:53

@Endoftheroad12345 think yourself lucky with the needle incident. My cousin stood on one, was disregarded and it emerged from her knee some months later 😯

I am screaming!!!!!

OP posts:

Riversideandrelax · 18/06/2024 19:19

NotARealWookiie · 18/06/2024 19:08

This is my line! I’ve said this so many times “sorry I’m at capacity for friends” 😂

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You're hardly going to be expected to be best buddies due to spending a couple of hours together at a kids party!

Riversideandrelax · 18/06/2024 19:18

itstheendoftheworldasweknowitnow · 18/06/2024 18:38

Well you haven’t, babes, have you now. It’s just one person. Chill.

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Exactly. According to you in NZ most parents will drop off (same as where I am in the UK!) so is it really likely 20 parents will want to stay?? It's one person!

VanGoSunflowers · 18/06/2024 19:09

MonaChopsis · 18/06/2024 19:08

Just volunteering my services as a Project Manager/ Event Organiser. Based on my last two projects, I can ensure this party is over budget, under specced, and delivered a minimum of 10 working days late.

Form an orderly queue to the left, please.

<snort>