To think most women on here hate men

That isn’t an example of trivial, the man in that thread is a dick, plain and simple. As someone who put up with someone who was verbally explosive for far too long, I’d suggest leaving as well. I wish I hadn’t listened when told that ‘letting emotions go in the moment’ was his healthy way of dealing with stress. Being gaslit by being told that he wasn’t ‘shouting’ just ‘saying his feelings loudly’ whilst I couldn’t get a quieter word in edgeways. Bloody awful and mentally draining.

Yes. Well said.

And the other posters point about who cares if women hate men, it doesn’t translate into danger for them - unlike the other way round!

Do you think women are leaving happy relationships because someone on MN told them to?

Do you think that actually happens? That women are that stupid and easily led within their own lives?

The example you’ve posted - the replies are harsh, but my take is that the DH completely overreacted - a decent man would have said “are you ok? Are you hurt?” But he went on and on about her making a mistake.
She possibly overreacted by looking at hotels, but all I can see for her is a future with a sulky husband pointing out all the bad decisions she’s ever made and not admitting any responsibility in life, which ends up being a really dismal existence (been there done that).

That’s my take based on my experiences and seeing familiar patterns of behaviour. That’s how people advise, based on their knowledge.
They’ve been together a few years, but very often it’s having a baby that brings out the reality of how a couple works together, and this one doesn’t look great.

Lol, what? Women talking about how the men in their life behave, asking questions, or just having a rant isn't hate. Women are allowed to have the opinion that some men are shit, its ok, the world wouldn't end. The fact you don't understand that is odd.
I'm constantly surprised by how little women actually dislike men, considering how much abuse, assault, murder and rape we all see and read about day in day out.
If you want to see actual hate, go read the male centered subs on reddit, or post anything positive about being a woman on twitter. Being annoyed and posting about being mistreated by a male stranger or how your boyfriend/husband wants you to do everything/be their mummy-maid isn't the same.

But not realising their privilege, and not acting better if they do realise it, IS arsehole behaviour. They might be perfectly nice superficially but they are still arseholes. And it absolutely IS gendered: because of the differences in how men and women are treated within a patriarchal system. I have no sympathy for a nice man who fucks up in a way that makes him sad because he's not getting coddled for it.

Hate is a strong word. I'm ambivalent to most of them. I have a dh and a ds who I love. But I have no male friends and no wish to have any really. I mean who cares if women hate men anyway...it doesn't translate into any actual danger for them does it?

I like men on an individual level. I don't like men on a population level.

And right now, with all the gender ideology crap, I have never disliked men more tbh.

when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye”

But if it really was an isolated incident in a truly was a great relationship then OP probably wouldn’t be posting. I think people post when they start realising that maybe it’s not quite so great.

@NonPlayerCharacter "I think it's a sign of someone's own prejudice and lack of insight to come on here, see the number of accounts of truly awful male behaviour and conclude that the problem is that women hate men."

It's absolutely classic ingrained misogyny. The patriarchy works on us from birth. Why look at whether or not men are a problem, when you can easily transfer the blame to women? Enraging.

I wouldn't put up with anything like that. I have no problem with those who said that OP should leave in that situation.

I’d say the opposite. Too many women on here are quick to defend useless men and weaponised incompetence. Men who have left their mother’s thinking their wives will just fill that role, and the quite embarrassing amount of women on here who will say ‘ah well you see men don’t think about these things, have you told him how you feel, have you written him list? But don’t nag of course, no one likes women who go on about what’s bothering them’. The excuses made by some women about these men who are slowly mentally destroying their partners is a bigger problem than a few over enthusiastic LTB.

“great relationship, today partner upset me.."

Many times these posts turn out to be a straw that broke the camel's back scenario. Women on here who have been through abusive relationships can often recognise the signs of it, and dig a little deeper and lo and behold it isn't just a trivial argument, but a pattern of behaviour. You've given examples of obvious ltb behaviour (cheating, violence etc,) but emotional abuse can be more insidious than that, more of a chipping away/boiled frog. People are free to ignore reactions and advice that they feel is OTT, but imho those are worth it for the countless times I've seen women bolstered and supported on here when they've otherwise been made to feel small and that their concerns are insignificant.

for anyone misunderstanding me, if a post says the partner is hurting physically, calling names, cheating, putting the op down, then yes I agree, ltb (so long as the post is true) it’s when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye” and everyone calls the poor guy a narcissist etc

YABU for multiple reasons.

1. Even if you think many posters are too harsh with their LTBs, that does not mean they hate all men, does it? Pretty much all will have male relatives, friends and acquaintances they like or love.
2. It is ok to end a relationship because you are not happy with how your partner treats you. Nobody gets to say to someone else 'That behaviour isn't bad enough for you to leave him'.
3. Your example is unrealistic. Posters generally only say LTB over one incident if it's really, really bad. Otherwise, someone always asks what he's like normally. About 90% of the time it turns out to be a pattern of behaviour.
4. MN isn't a hive mind. Lots of posters give non-LTB suggestions.

No, most women on here don't hate men. However it's a female-oriented site so it's going to centre women and sadly a lot of threads are prompted by men treating women very badly.

The very fact that it's the go to for so many angry MRAs is proof that there aren't that many places that centre women the way MN does; if there were, there wouldn't be so many of them because they'd have more places to go. MN isn't a perfectly balanced place but female-centred places aren't that common and a lot of people see that female centre as misandry, though they wouldn't see an equivalent male place as misogynistic.

I think it's a sign of someone's own prejudice and lack of insight to come on here, see the number of accounts of truly awful male behaviour and conclude that the problem is that women hate men.

The LTBs don't worry me either. Women aren't leaving fabulous healthy relationships with wonderful men because of MN. That's paranoid nonsense from people who are deeply threatened by female spaces, know nothing about how hard it is to leave abusive relationships and think women are really that incapable of making their own decisions.

Ah yes, but 30:70 is a big minority. Probably a hung parliament!

I don't hate men, I have plenty in my life who are lovely. But they are still fucking entitled, if you place them in a societal context. They are utterly privileged and don't know it. I'm bringing up a DS and it is an uphill struggle some days because the default for him is that women are there to pick up the slack. He would be horrified if he thought he was behaving like this, but it's so ingrained in our society that he just...does. (Till he doesn't and that's my job and it is tiring.)

Unfortunately there are millions upon millions of them who are entitled and also just not very nice, not willing to learn or change. Because it's work, and there's no benefit to them in doing it. It does my head in. Men overall are a bloody burden on women, in every arena of life, and it's infuriating. But that's the society we've got! Thank goodness we can make ourselves aware of it en masse these days.

YANBU- at all- but I suspect this won’t go down well. I do agree with you. People take it too far on here and I reckon some posters are drawn to pile-ons and assuming the worst about men if they themselves have had a negative experience. If your husband is ten minutes late home from work he’ll be staying with another woman. Etc etc etc.

This sounds a broken record but we are only hearing one side of any situation yet the claws come our and the endless double standard, I do wonder if women get tired of polishing their halo's

And yes I am female

We live in a patriarchal society where women are socialised to be polite and self-sacrificing. This often ends with women accepting shit from men.

I think it's pretty healthy to embrace a bit of anger about me behaviour tbh.