One night stands/casual sex

Mmm... part of me wants to agree, but then again, there's been a dud or twio IRL!!

@ClawdeenWolf spectactularly perfect response! Thank you. 😃

Ffs 😂 it sounds just as amazing as you describe OP x

😂 this gave me a chuckle.

I'm the opposite in thought process, I have been with 2 people, long term relationships, now married to one of them that I've been with for 15 years. But I often wonder if I've missed out and do sometimes regret not doing a bit more before settling down, I'm not smug about having not experienced being with others, as there's nothing to be smug about.

I was born in the 1950s. I can assure you (from the stories told by my parents) people were at it like rabbits. They knew very little about disease and whilst the contraceptive pill wasn't around, backstreet abortions were.

I can see your point, OP.

But - I'm old, I'm single, my responsibilities are almost done. I think I'm entitled to any fun that comes my way. A night, a fortnight, a couple of years, whatever. Ten minutes, if the property is exceedingly hot.
As my grandma used to say 'a little of what you fancy does you good.'😂
[I don't know about other people but for me, sex toys are absolutely pointless and don't enhance the experience of having a wank, frankly.]

😂😂😂

Hello 1950’s!

Stop judging something you haven’t got a clue about. Stop the sex-shaming. Sex is natural and it doesn’t change a person if they have had 1 or 501 partners as long as they are happy, safe and not hurting feelings.

You seem to sound very smug with your situation. Good for you. Personally, it sounds boring af but I wish you well.

😂😂😂😅😅😅😅😅😅 'putting your genetalia into another'
Oh, so very judgemental!
How very prudish!
How very dare anyone exchange body fluids and give another person pleasure unless they are bonded together in the house of a non-existant deity (or local council office)?
You made a decision to limit an aspect of your life that others do not necessarily want to limit. Do you get anniversary tokens like they do in AA?

You're happy as you are. They're happy as they are. The world keeps turning. Although if you think masturbating eith a dildo is as good as having sex with another hot blooded person then I'm concerned about your amazing sex life.

Wow, this thread is grim. Of course you aren't the only people who have only been with each other but the smug judgemental tone you're giving can do one. I've slept with loads of people both before marriage, between marriages and after marriage (swingers!) and it's something I am very happy with. It doesn't devalue my sex life with my husband. I'd never judge you for only having one partner and you're very lucky to have a good sex life with him (many women in your position don't) so why judge me and how I get my kicks?

Oh OP!!! Come on

Or you've both just settled

That's because you're with your husband. If you weren't who knows how you'd feel.

🤣🤣 great find fair play!

How do you know you have a ‘great sex life’ if you have no comparison 🤷🏼‍♀️ I know sex with my DH is great because I had multiple partners before him….

it also means I know he wasn’t the best at certain things when I met him but I was experienced enough to show him what I liked 🙃

First few partners / times I had sex we’re awful, can’t imagine having stuck with any of them and still having to endure the sex years later, but at the time I had no idea it was awful as I had nothing to compare it too….

A ONS could completely change your view on how ‘great’ your sex life is OP

How can you be early 20's and be together 15years?!

Hahahahahahahahaha. Yeah it doesn’t actually sound that special at all OP.

Oh come on

I’ve only been with my DH. I was 20 when we met and only had a few minor relationships that weren’t sexual. He was 19 and had also been in a few teenage relationships, but had quite a few one night stands as well.

We are 10 years in and still have a great sex life. I do sometimes wonder what it would be like to have casual sex with a stranger, but it doesn’t eat away at me or anything, more just a passing thought once in a blue moon. I also can’t really imagine being with anyone else sexually. I do have some intense dreams occasionally 😂

He sometimes says he regrets most of the one night stands he’s had before he met me and the way he lost his virginity (to an older woman who was a family friend and took advantage). He will say on occasion that he wishes he was a virgin when we met the same as I was. I told him I actually prefer that he wasn’t because he won’t ever wonder what it’s like to be with someone else.

I sort of rambled on but my main point is, I can see it from both perspectives. I don’t regret only having one sexual partner and sometimes I do feel slightly smug and happy about it. But I also wonder what the anticipation and flirting etc would be like with a one night stand and wonder if I missed out on something.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with either.

Just to add, a toy is nowhere near the same as a person! The intimacy, skin to skin contact, being able to kiss and touch etc…

Good golly, good gosh.I just don't understand all.this icky people and their icky genitals! I'm not being judgey though; I just want to understand. Is there anyone out there as pure as me? But I'm not judging!

you’ve summed yourself up perfectly …smug. You haven’t had multiple partners or one night stands because you met your husband young. It’s 2024 if people want to have one nightstands then so be it. It’s not a new thing. I could flip this and say I don’t understand how you had meet and wed young and only ever have the same partner- sex must get boring surely with the same person you don’t know if you are misssing out.

Well, we're all different is the simple answer.

I perfectly understand your take on life. There's no obligation for you to do anything different.

However, I just couldn't imagine waking up with the same person for the rest of my life. I like short relationships: kind of starting on a Friday night and ending on a Saturday morning when it's time to think about going to the football ⚽

There's no requirement for you to give any headspace to the way my life works. Both our choices are valid.

Your comment about the sex toy is a bit 😯 Wouldn't you get as much from a sex toy as you would from your DH? The sex toy wouldn't snore, make a mess in the house or generally get under your feet.

I don’t keep my sense of self worth in my genitals. I have had multiple sexual partners, some amazing, some forgettable, post divorce and I want to experience everything this rich life has to offer before I die. It’s just a different way of looking at the world.

It's just like trying all the different fruit in the fruit bowl. Maybe you just found a nice apple you liked, nothing wrong with that, but other people keep going until they've tried out all the other flavours.

Interesting. Well, OP, maybe if you'd both slept around a bit more, he might have learned that women don't like to be treated like this, and you might have found someone who would treat you better than that.

But, on behalf of the rest of us, thank you for taking him out of the dating pool.