Is it horrible to make ds walk

Again, he won't be sitting in wet, soggy clothes all day - they'll dry.

And the speculation around potential sensory issues isn't really relevant as OP hasn't said anything about him struggling with those things.

We had a 35 min walk from reception on - no issues. I always carried the bag, raincoats , rain trousers or warm coats as required . No problem as long as it isn’t all along a busy, boring road.
Nobody needs to sit in damp trousers- rainproof clothing exists.

He doesn’t need to sit in wet soggy clothes all day though, he can get the bus. And some SEN kids would struggle with the sensory aspect of being soaking wet in school too.

40 mins each way for an SEN child is a disaster waiting to happen. It will not end well at all. Does he have an EHCP? Have you looked into funded transport for him? Is there anyone else who can get the bus with him? If there’s no other way, then you will have to get the bus there with him, you walk back home, then walk back to school later and get the bus back home with him.

Over recent years I’ve really suffered being in cramped commuter spaces - despite having commuted all my adult life in London! I had one bad experience and that was it, my brain decided I wasn’t safe anymore. It’s taken a lot of CBT and personal willpower to keep trying to undo this. One of my main motivators was I didn’t wanna pass this fear onto my children. I’m sure at some point they have been aware of this, but OP you really have to try for the sake of your son to push through this little bit. Believe me, I know how incredibly hard it is, but the more he sees your fear the more he is going to start fearing it himself. Either that or he is going to really resent you from stopping him living his life and slogging it out every morning on a 40
minute walk.

Walking is great! Healthy and good exercise! No issue whatsoever, OP 😀 @Whyohwhy99

You're right, it is miserable, but his trousers won't be damp all day - he'll be in school - they'll dry.

Realistically would you be able to leave the house early enough every day to be on time? Does he have much kit to carry? What about after school?

I used to walk 30 mins home from school, on a regular basis, in primary school.

I am not sure how it is horrible to make a child use his legs for their intended purpose.

Edit: just saw that OP clarified he is SEN, which puts a different spin on things.

Do you think he will manage the bus on his own by the end of the term? Or the end of the school year? I do think he should be given all the options available and choose for himself when he is familiar with both the walk and the bus ride.

I agree with PPs that passing your anxiety about the bus to your son is a very real possibility and one to actively prevent.

Sitting in damp trousers all day is miserable. He will have a coat but unless it goes down to his feet his trousers will be wet.

Does he have any physical issues @Whyohwhy99 ? How does he cope with school? My children with SEN wouldn't have coped because they used all of their energy on coping with the school day.

Is he entitled to school transport?

It's not horrible in my world.It's normal.

I'm not here to pick apart OP's reasons or to make her feel bad.

Her question was "is it horrible to make an 11 year old walk 40 minutes to school" and my answer was (and still is) no.

I think it would be fine to try and then decide once you see how it goes.
Starting secondary can be tiring - mentally - so the walk home might help regulate or it might be another stressor, only you will know your son to know which it might be.
The other issue as others say is the weather. I think coming home in the rain would be ok as you can get changed once home. However making him walk in the rain for 40 mins even with a decent coat is likely to leave him soggy to sit in for the rest of the day which again could cause dysregulation.
Also timings would be another concern. You say its 40 mins, have you tried it out yet at the pace you/he walk at? Could be faster or might be slower. Would this mean having to leave much earlier than you would need to if getting the bus, meaning an early wake up that wouldn't be required otherwise? Also it will soon be dark early-ish, would you want to be walking around when it might be better on the bus?

Do you think children only pick up on these things when they are told about them?

That's mean. What is he schlepping around? What if it is pouring with rain?

Because he doesn't need to know it's avoidant.

If you do understand, can you explain why it is fine for the OP to model avoidant behaviours to her DS?

Let him get the bus on his own.

Are you the lady who was not able to tolerate someone in her house to service the gas boiler @Whyohwhy99 ?

Respectfully, I've lived with anxiety my entire life. So yes, I do understand.

I was just answering the OP's question which was whether it was cruel to make an 11yo walk to school. And it's not.

Yes.

The reasons aren't relevant to me - it's not cruel to make an 11yo walk themselves to and from secondary - it's normal.

Respectfully, I don’t think you have a great understanding of mental health and anxiety if you think her DS won’t pick up on this. And avoidant behaviours are not helpful to OP either.