Not sure where to post. DD is yr 12 nearly 17. I think she is really struggling as she seems very stressed and on edge (and has been for awhile) but she refuses to accept or admit this is the case and won’t accept any help from us, refuses to go to the GP or go for counselling either with me or on her own. She is at a large comp and they don’t know her and I think always manages to dip under the radar. She has dyslexia as I pushed for a diagnosis when she was 8. At the time school thought she was fine no problems and was only slightly below average but she is bright works hard and had developed her own coping strategies. We also paid for a private tutor to come to the house.
What can I/we do to help her when she doesn’t want to be helped? We love her but she has it into her head that we favour DS over her. We have tried to reassure her but she doesn’t accept it.
The reasons that make me/us think she is maybe ND or on the spectrum are;
Not interested in things other teenagers are
Hates any attention on her
Doesn’t want any affection from us at all
Takes little part in family life and spends large chunks of time in her bedroom, blinds closed and in a dressing gown (does her schoolwork this way too).
Goes mad if I look at her or smile at her
Difficulty holding or engaging in conversations at home (even when in the car and not looking at her.
Had friendship struggles since year 6.
Now has an obsession with one best friend who I think she maybe in love with.
Refuses to talk about her feelings generally.
Is fiercely independent refuses to show us any schoolwork or have any help whatsoever from myself, DH or slightly older DS with anything.
Hygiene
Lying and secretive
Extreme angry outbursts
Diet is extremely restrictive mainly beige and bland refuses to eat meat or fruit outright. Loves chocolate.
Finds certain food smells very offensive.
This morning in the car on the way to school when I calmly asked her if she was ok she said
she thought we (our family) were all clinically insane.