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Thread for those who have left marriages that weren't AWFUL, just unsatisfying (pt. III)

(6 Posts)
shandybass Sun 22-Jan-17 20:19:11

A third thread for our little gang? Over here. I think it was quite fitting if a bit ironic that part ll started in June for us bods trying to decide if our marriages are too bad to carry on and finished with Porffor's dh asking for a final shag.
Is there any hope?
Hugs to all if you want to carry on.

shandybass Sun 22-Jan-17 21:26:45

Oops I've just realised it wasn't you Porffor, it was Hurley being propositioned for a final shag.
I've also realised the title of the thread is misleading as we're mostly still in the marriages here not 'who have left'
Anyone know if you can edit a title and how to tag mumsnetters?

dm86 Sun 22-Jan-17 22:53:04

Hi everyone.Yay new shiny thread grin

Well I'm stuck in limbo at the minute like many of us.We had the talk last week and I know he wouldn't react we'll to its over. So I went with I want some time apart and to separate first. He didn't react well although he did admit he was entirely at fault for everything and that he hasn't gone about things in the right way. He's refusing to move and this is his one last chance and he'll move out no questions asked if it doesn't work. It's been 14 years so what's going to change now? If he can be husband of the year now why couldn't he before?

He is now on his best behaviour. Helping with the kids and housework and doing the morning school run etc. But the love has gone for me I feel. Has anyone ever successfully managed to have a happy marriage after going through shit over the years?

Just been listening to music and I know it's a cheesy old boyband song but listen to A1 - same old brand new you. That's how I feel about it right now and I can relate to the song! Hope everyone is doing ok! confused

shandybass Sun 22-Jan-17 23:20:25

Hi dm66. Yay shiny new thread. Although I feel we've been round this spin cycle a few too many times.
I'm sure there are people who turn things around but I think they are few and far between. I think the live lost from all those missed opportunities accumulated to one big hurt. People generally pick up on issues even men and choose to ignore stuff. I think even when they realise what's wrong it's very hard to change, but for me the unwillingness to consider changes and ti work at making us a happy unit was a final nail in our coffin of love lost.
Having said that good luck dm86. It's really hard whichever way you turn.
Dh has actually told his Mum and family and I'm in shock. Of course it took him 24 hrs to tell me during which time I'd been texting sil. And when I asked him how it went and what they said I was accused of interrogating him and told nothing. But still it's a relief.
Next hurdle sorting out splitting our stuff. I've got loads but he will have the bigger house.

Hurleygirl123 Fri 27-Jan-17 17:07:43

Yay!! I've found you all lol...I've missed this thread...I started one too but will try to delete it to save confusion!
Things here are moving forward in a stop /start way, he's is taking house nearby which is great for our dds...but is being a dick by not communicating, apart from when he interrogates 15yr old dd!! I've pulled him up about it, so hopefully it will stop..tension in this house not good so hoping he will go soon, for all our sakes. Still waiting on word from tax credits tho...
So h
Good to find you all again! grin

Hurleygirl123 Fri 27-Jan-17 17:10:09

Also he's now told his family who are being very good about the far..hope it continues like that for dds sake .

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