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Relationships

Seeing people you know on dating sites

7 replies

StuffezLaYoni · 18/05/2013 12:41

I'm on OkCupid and was having a look to see who'd visited my profile and lo and behold, a guy from my group of friends has seen my profile. To make it worse, I had a ONS with one of his friends last week... Am I being irrationally embarrassed? I know online dating isn't exactly uncommon, but I don't relish the idea of everyone knowing I'm on there.

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BreakOutTheKaraoke · 18/05/2013 12:45

I think the unspoken rule of dating sites is to pretend you you never saw them on there. I have seen various friends/exes/people I've been on dates with, and if you bump into them you just pretend you've never seen them. They do always view you, but that means you get to view their profile too!

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StuffezLaYoni · 18/05/2013 12:48

I guess so! This guy isn't the master of tact but let's hope he is aware of the unspoken rule! I'm just feeling a bit hmmm about him mentioning it to the ONS bloke. I certainly didn't plan it to happen, but i did instigate it. Just don't want to look desperate.
Ah well!

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SirRaymondClench · 18/05/2013 13:43

You certainly won't look desperate! Why would you?
You're single and can do what you like.
If you'd liked this ONS guy you'd probably have seen him again but you didn't so onwards.
If you were MARRIED and on a dating site then thats different. And anyway the guy that looked at your profile is also on that site so he can't say anything can he?
Maybe he is interested in you and is checking you out? :)

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StuffezLaYoni · 18/05/2013 13:59

I don't think so His type appears to be very slender, blonde women, and I am about as far away from that as could be!
Thanks for the reassurance though, and you're right - it would be awful seeing a married friend on there.

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stopmovingthefurniture · 18/05/2013 14:58

Not embarrassing at all. Just laugh.

I met my DH through an internet dating site. I saw a couple of profiles belonging to my older brother's friend (funny enough, I always had to be this guy's 'wife' in my brother's films). It wasn't cringy, more of a 'hey, comrade!', as if we'd passed each other on the street. But I didn't think it was ethical to read his profile as that might have made him uncomfortable.

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ALittleStranger · 18/05/2013 22:06

I 'liked' someone I know through work once without clocking. That was embarrassing.

Otherwise I think you just have to get on with it and never speak of it in polite company. I haven't come across anyone I really know but I see quite a lot of people who I come across in other circles which makes me wonder why I'm bothering with OD and really ought to just put myself about in real life more.