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Where to start with IVF?

(2 Posts)
Lazyafternoon Wed 01-Feb-17 14:32:24

So after TTC for DC2 for getting on for 3 years, much prodding probing, 6 rounds of Clomid it would seem 'unexplained' secondary infertility is now very likely explained by my fibroids and endometriosis. I'm now coming to terms with IVF probably being our only option if we want a 2nd child. I'm also 37 so time is ticking by.

But as I've been in denial I've realised I don't really have a clue about IVF. Where is the best place to start? I can Google all day and not really know any more. My NHS consultant said she could refer us if still not pregnant at next appointment - in July. But I'm impatient, I'll be 38 by then.

The first thing DH asks is "How much does it cost?" my guestimate is about £15k, but I don't really know why!
We live in the South East, are there local clinics in the Home Counties or are the clinics mostly in London?
How do you choose a clinic?

I'm also wondering about if it's right going down the IVF route when I have a gorgeous little 3 year old already. I feel very torn. Shouldn't I be happy we've got him? There's loads of advantages to only one child. Is it fair to spend all the money we could borrow (we don't have that sort of money sitting about!) and then be skint paying it off just to attempt for a 2nd child? Any experiences?

blackcherries Thu 02-Feb-17 22:20:18

Hiya. I've got a 2 year old and been ttc#2 for about a year and have had a low sperm count diagnosis so jumping straight to IVF. Honestly never ever thought we'd be in this boat as conceived #1 straight away.
IVF feels like a huge shock but at the same time it's pretty much the only game in town - this is how I think of it anyway! But now I've come to terms with it I feel at least we're "doing something".

I was recommended the book 'Get a life' which will help you immensely and it's only a few quid on ebay.

I'm trying not to think about the cost - but it's about £5.5k I think for us not counting all the other appointments and consultations, scans etc we had to get here. IVF itself is about £3500 here and another £1000 for drugs and loads of other things that all add up. Just the appointment that set out dates and gave us forms to sign etc was £350.

I literally chose the nearest clinic for convenience but then it's very highly regarded and there aren't many locally.

I'm trying to prepare myself for it not to work and the money to basically be spunked away (almost literally) which is difficult for a tightarse like me and it's quite a bad time financially but I feel very strongly that I want 2 children. If it didn't happen I would find the good things about having one but all my friends are having their second and I feel really left behind. (That's not a reason, I know, it just adds to it).

I also shared your bewilderment at googling, I think it doesn't really help, and speaking to a consultant is your best bet, or ask here but be prepared for different stories that might not help...

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