Baby name change

(14 Posts)
Malteaser91 Sat 25-Apr-20 15:25:46

I have a beautiful nine month old baby girl. Since she was about 6 weeks old (just after we registered the birth) I have had a little regret about her name. I always had a shortlist of Olivia, Lyla, Emilia or Millie. We decided to go with Lyla Rose. I love her name, therefore have tried to just get on with it, however I really feel as though I have her the wrong name and I feel like a terrible parent for it. For some reason one of the other names just seems to suit her so much more so when I look at her I just see her as xxxxx. I have even thought about adding it as a forename, therefore xxxxx Lyla Rose, but I feel like people would think I’m crazy. I know you have a year to change the birth certificate. Please, please don’t judge I just feel as though this feeling isn’t going away and don’t want a lifetime of regret that I gave my baby the wrong name. I just want to know peoples thoughts

OP’s posts: |
Whatsyourflava Sat 25-Apr-20 15:29:51

What does your partner think? I think they’d have to sign the form if you change the name.
What don’t you like about Lyla or it is it purely that you think it doesn’t suit her? What do you prefer about your first choice? Is it more traditional? More unusual? Or is it purely you think it’s suits her better.

Don’t feel bad. BabyName regret is very common on these threads. No judgment here whatsoever - I’ve been there too!

Malteaser91 Sat 25-Apr-20 15:40:54

Thank you for being so understanding. I typed my original message three times then deleted, as I thought people would think I’m crazy. I do like the name Lyla obviously as it was in my shortlist, however as she has grown and showing more of a personality I do feel that one of the other names suits her more. I feel we rushed the decision at the beginning as there was a lot of pressure to choose a name. A lot of people do pronounce her name wrong as well, however, that doesn’t tend to bother me too much. I do feel that I should of given her a more traditional name. It is something that I’m becoming obsessed with and I just don’t want it to consume me or ruin my time with my baby. I just feel so so terrible that I didn’t get it right the first time. I have talked to my partner and he is a very laid back understanding guy, however I don’t think he likes the idea of completely. I think he worries about what people would think. One of my big concerns is that would it affect her? Would she wonder why we don’t say her original name anymore. Although, I do tend to call her by her nickname ‘munchkin’ way more than her actual name lol

OP’s posts: |
IndiaMay Sun 26-Apr-20 16:39:51

I know someone who changed their daughters name at 3 months. And it was a complete 360 change. Eg called her legally Daisy and at 3 months renamed her Niamh. There was about a month where everyone was like 'wtf!?' And then everyone just forgot and shes Niamh now. If you want to do I think go for it. You wont be the first people to do so and you wont be the last

Jamiladodger Sun 26-Apr-20 16:43:12

Go for it! Change it. F what anyone thinks I mean it's not as though you're giving her a tattoo, I'm sure everyone will cope. X

zscaler Sun 26-Apr-20 23:04:11

A friend of mine changed her baby’s name at 11 months - to a totally different name. Didn’t matter at all, everyone got used to it very quickly!

Staffori Sun 26-Apr-20 23:35:34

My ex's name was changed from Kevin to Robert in his first year of life. By the time I met him, thirty years later, his father didn't even remember that he'd ever been Kevin. It caused no problems at all with anyone. I think it's a very easy thing for people to understand.

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ladycarlotta Sun 26-Apr-20 23:36:39

Are you suffering from depression or anxiety at all? I ask as you are beating yourself up a bit - you 'feel so terrible' you 'didn't get it right' and fear a 'lifetime of regret'. I don't want to make assumptions, I just wonder if your feelings about her name are actually part of a bigger picture, or you're pouring all your worries about your parenting in general into this one tiny issue?

Regretting things like the name you chose can be a symptom of PND, so maybe take the opportunity to talk it through with more people you trust. For what it's worth, I think you've chosen a lovely name, but if you do really want to change it and you think that would genuinely fix the way you feel, then there's no reason not to go ahead. I know people who did change their baby's name and it worked out fine.

AncientRainbowABC Sun 26-Apr-20 23:47:48

I too have friends who changed their baby girl’s name at around 6 months old from something very “clean” and ordinary like Sarah to a “pretty” and flowery name ending with “elle”. I can’t actually remember the child’s original name, it was just announced that it had changed and everyone got on with it. Sure, a couple of idiots raised an eyebrow (for all of 2 seconds), and then moved on. People will adapt. Do what’s best for you and your lovely little family. You sound like a fabulous mum, so caring and kind. I’d just say make sure you mean to do it and it’s not a displacement thing for other anxieties or worries.

K1mberlylauren Sun 26-Apr-20 23:54:22

Hi, I’m not sure you can get the name changed on a birth certificate tho I think the original name gets crossed out, and replaced like now known as or something

K1mberlylauren Sun 26-Apr-20 23:55:09

I know a lyla such a beautiful name

Fairybobbin Mon 27-Apr-20 03:19:10

Hi, I changed my daughter's name spelling when she was 16 weeks, I'm also friends with another lady who changed her baby's name and spoken to several others. We can really understand your feelings! From my experiences so far, if you feel as strongly as your describing that regret doesn't usually go. It's super scary changing their name in any way, but if you picture what feels best for you and your baby over both of your lives that might help you decide. If you want to PM me, I'm happy to talk it through with you anymore.

ladycarlotta Mon 27-Apr-20 10:34:49

Hi, I’m not sure you can get the name changed on a birth certificate tho I think the original name gets crossed out, and replaced like now known as or something

No, it should be fine, especially under the age of 1. Also you can get a new birth certificate if the parents get married later so that's also an option - I actually regret not giving my daughter an additional middle name so I hope to take the opportunity of our CP to add it in.

mamablondie2 Tue 28-Apr-20 12:52:12

I wouldn’t change it and I think you need to consider whether these feelings are coming from a place of being low generally. I think we just spend the early days worrying constantly about everything - I had bouts of it with DD1 where I wondered if I should have called her something less popular etc. But over time those thoughts stopped and now she just is her name (nearly 2 now).

For what it’s worth I also think Lyla is far nicer than your other choices but I know that’s not really the point of this thread. Babies change a lot also and just because you don’t look at her now and think ‘it suits her’ Doesn’t mean you won’t further down the line. I really wouldn’t change it.

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