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Rhyming names

(14 Posts)
Redskiesinthemorning Mon 24-Dec-18 02:20:16

My SIL is very close to us. She adores my daughter and recently had a daughter of her own. My daughter has a fairly classic name, not unheard of but pretty rare. Not a short name either.

SIL recently had her baby, a girl, and we were thrilled for her. She's named her baby daughter a name which rhymes with our daughter's name. The name is from another country (their family has heritage from this country) but unheard of in the UK - it's not like our daughter is called Holly and she's named hers Molly, more like... If our daughter was called Leonora (she's not) SIL has names her daughter Deeonora. This isn't the best example but I'm trying to show you the sort of vibe my daughter's name has, and also show that the two names are VERY noticeable as rhyming names and because of the very very very unusual nature of her daughter's name, it looks like it was done deliberately (it was, by her).

Anyway, this pissed me off secretly because we spend a lot of time with SIL and are a close family and our daughter's will be together a lot. I feel like by giving her daughter the name she has, she's sort of taken away from the niceness/individualness of our daughter's name and sort of cheapened it made it into a bit of a joke. The two names together sound truly ridiculous and instead of having "What a lovely name!" Comments that we used to get for DDs name, we have already started getting some hmm looks and awkward comments from people when the two girls are together and we tell them their names.

This isn't even the worst of it. So SIL has a stepsister who isn't related to DH but who we are also pretty close to as SIL is. We spend a fair amount of time with her. SILs stepsister is also expecting a little girl and we have just found out she's planning to name her baby a ridiculous name which she has TOTALLY made up, which rhymes with our daughter's name too! So imagine now it will be like Leonora, Deeonora and Keeonora or something.

Am I being unreasonable to be absolutely gutted? I know it's not my place to say anything and I won't but I just feel SO upset and angry, I burst into tears when DH told me. It took us ages to think of a classic, uncommon but pretty sounding name for our DD and now I feel like SIL and her SS are just making us all look like absolute fools. I don't like rhyming names for close relatives at the best of times, but to have stupid made up names too... I really feel like they've made my DDs name go from being sweet and classic to tacky and nasty.

Please tell me I'm horribly overreacting because this is really bothering me and I really wish it wouldn't! I feel absolutely gutted and am thinking of changing DDs name.

ChaosMoon Mon 24-Dec-18 07:28:18

Don't change your DD's name. I get why you'd feel annoyed, but it sounds like it's being blown out of proportion.

A similar thing happened with me and my cousin. It's occasionally been inconvenient because people have misheard (cue elderly DGM hanging because she thought she'd misdialed when she hadn't) but the world hasn't ended.

If your DD is older then it'll be obvious that the normal named child came first and that the others have parents with odd decision making skills.

ZebraKid71 Mon 24-Dec-18 07:43:43

I'd be a bit annoyed but honestly it's entirely up to them what they call their child. If they both have long names it's likely at least one will become shortened as they get older. How old are they? Will they ever be in the same class at school or anything?

I don't think you're overreacting being annoyed but I do think you're overreacting by thinking about changing her name!

LoreleiPorelei Mon 24-Dec-18 07:50:12

Yeah I have calmed down a bit and don't think I'd actually change her name, I'm just sulking! Yes, the problem is DHs family is very close and big on family time so the kids will probably be together very regularly and because of the age gap their two will be in the same year at school (think mine just miss it, thank God!). The other problem I forgot to mention is that the nature of the names means that any natural nicknames would rhyme too (unless one of us went with a random nickname not linked to the real name, if you see what I mean)

LoreleiPorelei Mon 24-Dec-18 07:51:34

Oops! Name change fail! Nevermind. I think the OP is pretty outing as it it!

LoreleiPorelei Mon 24-Dec-18 07:54:06

Also to answer your question, my DD is 1, SIL DD is about 5 months, her SS DD isn't born yet but due soon

BendydickCuminsnatch Mon 24-Dec-18 07:59:24

If your DD’s name is Lorelei then I can’t imagine what the other 2 names are other than being utterly ridiculous😄 you poor thing! Annoying they’re so close in age too as they could easily look like triplets when they’re older (and therefore won’t be obvious that you’re the original) Argh! At least most of her day to day life will be apart from her cousins for her whole life, most likely.

Blueberryhill123 Mon 24-Dec-18 08:04:34

I'm wondering if it's a bit of a family 'wind up' that the step sister is going to call her dd a similar name, just to get you all going?

She might name her something completely different when she's born. Although, if SS is determined on having the planned name, what does your SIL think of that?

LoreleiPorelei Mon 24-Dec-18 08:05:46

BendydickCuminsnatch yes exactly! The age gap being so close is one of my biggest annoyances - I mean in a few years they could look like triplets! Or it could be not obvious who is the oldest so it might not be obvious who was named first. It's just so embarrassing! And yes, the other names are ridiculous - at least if they were more short or common it would be less embarrassing or maybe assumed to be a mistake?

Twisique Mon 24-Dec-18 08:33:44

You could alter her birth certificate to add another first name so she has options when she is older and embarrassed. Elizabeth Lorelei Grace sounds nice. Don't tell the ss.

Astronica Mon 24-Dec-18 08:58:48

I'm horrified by this and would feel pretty much as you do. Take your time to decide what to do. I would hate for you to change a name so loved and chosen with such care, and it's certainly not fair. I would consider however calling my daughter by some other name that you could love as much - just to try it out - and possibly putting the new name in the middle of current ones. It just gives you options later without losing the current name altogether.

GreatDuckCookery6211 Mon 24-Dec-18 09:26:10

Is your DD Lorelei and your neice Porelei?

GreatDuckCookery6211 Mon 24-Dec-18 09:35:08

OP I've just seen your other thread. Who are you considering calling Tallulah? confused

Phebes Mon 24-Dec-18 09:43:13

I’d be gutted too, OP. Some people are so odd! I probably would change it TBH but I’m probably overly invested in naming issues because we had something similar happen to us. It might feel too odd to you when you’ve known her as “Leonora” for a year though.

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