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AIBU?

The dentist struck off my 4 year old son

132 replies

Cornishcharm · 19/11/2019 17:33

Ok so, in October I had to rearrange my sons dentist appointment because it was his first parents evening. I gave a weeks notice and rearranged for November.

We were about to leave for my sons appointment and he wants to go for a poo. So I called the dentist and explained that we were going to be late (15 minutes max). I asked if he could still be seen i.e. let other patients go first or if that wasn't possible could I rearrange it.

Now I hate cancelling like that and the only other time I have had the cancel his appointment previously was when he had D&V and I wasn't able to give 24 hours notice.

The receptionist told me that I couldn't bring him as he wouldn't be seen and that he had been struck off.

We have never received and formal notice that he could be struck off.

I have submitted a formal complaint about this, which I should hear back from by the 25th November.

AIBU to think that can't strike a 4 year old off without any warning? Does anybody know what the rules are with NHS dentists (I know they operate a 2 strikes and your out).

Thanks

OP posts:
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FlashingLights101 · 19/11/2019 17:39

Do you know what the minimum notice for cancelling is? A week for the parents evening doesn't seem unreasonable to me.
But 15 mins for a poo seems quite a lot! I always aim to get there at least 5 to 10 mins before an appointment anyway, so really a toilet stop shouldn't have meant you being 15 mins late.

So I don't think the first one should really count against you as a week in advance seems reasonable.

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slashlover · 19/11/2019 17:46

I know they operate a 2 strikes and your out

Surely that's the 24 hours for D&V and then him needing a poo?

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OrangeZog · 19/11/2019 17:50

I know they operate a 2 strikes and your out

I agree, that the first strike was the d&v and this was the second one. Therefore, you son is quite rightly out.

I’m also not sure I would believe a 15 min poo excuse at the last minute. I don’t know any parents who don’t allow for (or expect) the odd delay when it comes to get a child ready for somewhere and 15 mins for a poo is a long time.

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Clangus00 · 19/11/2019 17:56

They’re definitely within their “rights” to remove your child from their list.
The D&V & the poo were your two strikes.
Look for another dental practice for your son.

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PumpkinPie2016 · 19/11/2019 17:57

I think they have taken one strike as D&V and one for the poo incident. The rearrangement from Oct sounds fine.

To be honest, I think there is so much demand for NHS dentists that they have to be strict on their policy.

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Bunnybigears · 19/11/2019 17:59

Why on earth would a poo make you 15 minutes late?

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GruciusMalfoy · 19/11/2019 18:03

You must have been cutting it pretty fine for time if this would have made you 15 minutes late. What would you have said to then if you'd hit traffic and been late? YABU.

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CalmFizz · 19/11/2019 18:03

I think you need to look for a new dentist.

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itsgettingweird · 19/11/2019 18:04

D and V shouldn't be a strike. Nhs own guidelines mean it should be cancelled.

Plus you called to say running late. They could have easily let those patients who had arrived early in first. The order people go in doesn't affect the time the surgery runs.

My ds dentist tried to refuse him treatment the other week because he needs a tooth sorting and they must do it within 8 weeks. They are closed for 2 weeks over Xmas and new year and the only 1 appointment available between then and end of year was 20 minutes before he has a hospital appointment 25 miles away.
It took me asking for practice managers details to complain for them to agree to give me appointment first day back after their closure. It was 9.5 weeks after check up but 7.5 weeks if you don't include closure.

But apparently if I wanted to go private they could do it after school the following week!

It's not the practices fault tbh. It's the state of the nhs.

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22Giraffes · 19/11/2019 18:04

I don't think they're in the wrong, a poo is not a valid reason to be late. If everyone that day needed a poo and ran late.... well you get the idea. Find another dentist and give yourself more time for appointments in future.

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Teachermaths · 19/11/2019 18:05

15mins late for a poo. You need to allow more time!

Not surprised they struck you off, you've messed them around twice.

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inwood · 19/11/2019 18:05

You were late for a poo?

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GrumpyHoonMain · 19/11/2019 18:07

NHS dentists are often really tolerant. Mine allowed me to cancel and rebook appointments last minute when my old private dentist would have charged me for the appointment. But you need a good reason.

Going for a last minute poo is not good enough.

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BertieBotts · 19/11/2019 18:08

The child is four! Does everyone else have children with perfectly coordinated toilet habits at that age? DS1 wouldn't have been. He was a nightmare for poos for ages.

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Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 19/11/2019 18:18

What BertieBotts said!

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FlamingoAndJohn · 19/11/2019 18:23

Why would a poo take 15 minutes? That said my husband can easily make them last that long.
If a last minute poo can make you that late then you were tight for time anyway.

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Bunnybigears · 19/11/2019 18:24

BertieBotts no but if I have an appointment I aim to be early so when things such as child suddenly needing a poo, traffic, sheep in the road happen I am not 15 minutes late.

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dottiedodah · 19/11/2019 18:26

Maybe you could look for a new Dentist,but make certain you leave plenty of time for a poo! Leave home early to get there say 20 mins before his Appointment ,then he can use the loo there if needed .The problem is Dentists are in short supply ATM ,and they cant really hang around like this .If Im correct they only get paid for seeing someone, so if a cancellation occurs the they are out of pocket!

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BennyTheBall · 19/11/2019 18:28

Seems a bit harsh but I know people being late or no-shows drives my dentist to distraction.

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Bluerussian · 19/11/2019 18:29

Find another dentist, this one was a bit harsh in my opinion.

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EleanorReally · 19/11/2019 18:29

its a shame you rang, you could have just turned up late

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Oblomov19 · 19/11/2019 18:30

So it's 3 times then?
No wonder they don't want to know.

All the dentists round here stopped taking any more NHS patients a long time ago. So busy!

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Birdsfoottrefoil · 19/11/2019 18:30

‘Off topic but... The vast majority of ‘NHS Dentists’ are private independent dental practitioners who just contract to provide services with the NHS. There was post going round on Facebook recently trying to scare people by saying the Tories would privatise GPs and dentists. GPs and dentists have always been private! As have opticians and pharmacists. (Though there are nowadays few in-house).

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GetyourAQSFright · 19/11/2019 18:30

What BertieBotts said

I discount what BertieBotts said because it doesn't address the fact that most people aim to be at appointments with 5-10 minutes to spare, so the delay shouldn't have meant a lateness of 15 minutes.

It's annoying OP and you should appeal to their good nature but in some areas of the country a space with an NHS dentist is as rare as hens teeth.

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Petrichor11 · 19/11/2019 18:31

No ones expecting a 4 year old to not need the toilet at inconvenient times, people are expecting the child’s parents to allow extra time for delays like that when going out for appointments!

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