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AIBU?

18 & 27 year old?

129 replies

theure · 26/02/2019 22:06

A friend of mine is 18 and is dating a 27 year old.

I find this a bit weird and looking for opinions as to whether I'm just being ridiculous and having too many opinions?
Would anyone else consider this a bit strange? Or is it socially acceptable after someone's 18?

OP posts:

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flimbo1212 · 26/02/2019 22:07

Both adults

Not your concern

NCforthis2019 · 26/02/2019 22:09

what - thats not that big an age gap! what concerns you? and how is it your business?

Aquamarine1029 · 26/02/2019 22:09

They are both adults. Leave them to it.

Nicknacky · 26/02/2019 22:10

I don’t see the issue with it. I dated a 30 year old when I was 19 and a year later started to see a 32 year old.

OhHolyJesus · 26/02/2019 22:11

I also think it's weird so with you OP.

Rade · 26/02/2019 22:12

I was 18 when I met DH.
40 years ago.

ivykaty44 · 26/02/2019 22:12

What is weird about two adults with a 9 year age gap dating?

azulmariposa · 26/02/2019 22:13

9 years isn't that bad. As you get older the gap seems less. Eg. 20/29 35/44 40/49.
My boyfriend is 44 and I'm 35. He's much more on my level than my ex who was the same age as me.

MadameJosephine · 26/02/2019 22:13

I had a boyfriend the same age when I was 18, we dated for 2 years. Can’t see a issue with it at all

needthisthread · 26/02/2019 22:15

What do you mean by 'is it socially acceptable after someone's 18?'?

It's nothing to

HennaLights · 26/02/2019 22:15

My exh is 10 years older than me. I have no qualms about dating a man 10 years younger than me either.

Nothing to see here. Maybe concern yourself with your own life.

Katterinaballerina · 26/02/2019 22:15

Creepy. I can see why the 18 year old is with someone older. I would be very dubious about the 27 year old.

needthisthread · 26/02/2019 22:15

Nothing to do with being socially acceptable and everything to do with 18 year olds being adults.

southnownorth · 26/02/2019 22:15

I was 18 and my DH was 28 when we met almost 20 years ago. He is not weird. It's weird to judge two adults having a relationship.

FrustratedTeddyLamp · 26/02/2019 22:16

See i dont find it that strange but its intriguing.

15 and 24 year old id find wrong
16 and 25 year old id find wrong
17 and 26 year old i still find a bit wrong
But 18 and 27 i feel should be fine.

whitehorsesdonotlie · 26/02/2019 22:17

I always liked men 10 years older when I was 18..... not your concern.

lou1221 · 26/02/2019 22:18

That's the same age gap I have with my dh. I was 21 when I first started seeing him.

icouldwriteabook · 26/02/2019 22:18

Baffles me how people have such moral high grounds with these situations.

My DP is 11 years older than me.

I’m more mature than him on many levels.

Please know what’s good for your friendship and stay out of it. None of it is ‘strange’ or ‘weird’, your over invested opinion is both strange and weird.

Bubblysqueak · 26/02/2019 22:19

I was 18 and DH was 28 when we met. We've been together 14years now and married 10. Doesn't sound so bad now we're 32 and 42

PossiblyPFB · 26/02/2019 22:20

Gonna go against the Mumsnet standard of “but they’re adults!” Technically they’re both ‘adults’ yes....but there is a fairly big difference in that particular age gap at this very moment in time given their ages and especially in that she’s still a teenager (albeit a legal adult). If they were 30 and 39 or 40 and 49 for example they may both have relative adult maturity to bridge the age gap, no problem. But at 18 and 27 YANBU, I’d find it strange too in most cases and question his motives.

MamaRaisingBoys · 26/02/2019 22:22

I was 18 and dh was 28 when we met. Married, 2kids, together 10yrs

needthisthread · 26/02/2019 22:23

possibly

How do you know it's the female who is 18?

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southnownorth · 26/02/2019 22:24

Seems like there are a few of us on here with sinister partners/husbands. I must ask my DH when he gets home from work what his motives were.

Katterinaballerina · 26/02/2019 22:29

It’s not the age gap it’s the age of the younger partner. No one would bat an eyelid at a 30 year old with a 39 year old because they are both mature adults. An 18 year old is probably still at school, living with their parents and being subbed cash. A 27 year old, even with 3 years out for a degree, has probably been working and living independently for 6 years. There is a huge imbalance in experience.

Out of interest, for all those saying it was fine,
I was with someone 10 years older as a teenager, how did you feel at 28/29/30 about the idea of you having a sexual relationship with an 18 year old? Did you get involved with teenagers yourselves?

PossiblyPFB · 26/02/2019 22:29

needthishread because in my personal experience it’s 100% always the woman who is younger in this particular situation. 🤷🏼‍♀️

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