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AIBU?

To ask for the benefits of living alone

118 replies

TheScandinavian · 24/04/2018 16:42

This is me soon, after leaving a abusive relationship. I have a DD, never lived alone before. Went straight from my parents home to marriage.

Please tell me the perks of living alone Grin

OP posts:
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Sonotcivil · 24/04/2018 16:44

doing whatever you want, whenever you want. fancy a chinese takeaway naked, go ahead!

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NukaColaGirl · 24/04/2018 16:44

Everything!

Can’t be arsed to wash the pots tonight? Fuck it, leave them. Ditto: tidying up, putting make up, getting changed out of your scruffs.

Watching what you want on TV.
Eating what and when you want.
Going out when you want.
Staying in when you want.

Also left an extremely controlling H.

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harriethoyle · 24/04/2018 16:45

No-one messing your stuff up after you've tidied. Hours in the bath without some CF wanting a pee so you have to jump out. Lovely tranquil quiet at night. Freedom to listen to whatever crap music you like. Marmite on toast being an acceptable dinner. Your choice over decor... I could go on! Coming up to 2 years of living just with my dogs and I LOVE IT Grin

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sunshinestorm · 24/04/2018 16:45

You can poo with the bathroom door open

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cleofatra · 24/04/2018 16:46

You can have your house how you want it....i.e feminine if you like.
You can eat what you like without having to cater for a man meal.
No men's shoes lying around (hate that)
The house can smell nice (no man trumps)
SEAT DOWN
No Shed and bloody Buried or any other random crap "male" TV show.
Apologies for the gender bias but these are some, anyway.

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ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 24/04/2018 16:46

I love it!!
I can read in bed anytime I want without being told to turn the lights out.
I never have to worry about being 'late' home.
It's so much easier to budget, and I'm way better off (even being on benefits) than I was in a relationship because he's not controlling the purse strings.
The only schedules I need to worry about are mine and the dc's.
I could go on...

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FrozenMargarita17 · 24/04/2018 16:47

Omg you can watch whatever on tv.

No one to complain about food/washing not being done yet

Your own SPACE! God the freedom would be good

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AntipodeanOpalEye · 24/04/2018 16:47

You make the rules.

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MsVestibule · 24/04/2018 16:47

Ah, I loved living by myself, did it for 16 years before DH and DCs ruined it all for me.

Sandwich/cereal for tea if you don't feel like cooking, able to make all decisions by myself, more money...

In your case, living by yourself will be infinitely better than living with an abusive partner. Well done on getting out of that Thanks.

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letsdolunch321 · 24/04/2018 16:49

I can only agree with all the above.

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flubdub · 24/04/2018 16:51

Sleeping diagonally across the bed! Surely can't just be me Grin

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Leeds2 · 24/04/2018 16:51

Don't have to make a "proper" dinner if you don't want to. And don't have to cook to accommodate someone else's preferences.
Can have friends round whenever you like, but only if YOU like. No need to accommodate someone else's friends.
Your money belongs to you alone, and can be spent how you like.
You get to choose where you go on holiday.
You get to choose what to do at the weekend.
Only your own washing and ironing to do.
Less dishes to wash.
No walking on eggshells.

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ghostyslovesheets · 24/04/2018 16:52

everything is where you left it

bed is all yours

Ditto the TV

No sorting other people's dirty pants

peace when you want it

council tax discount!

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FloydOnThePull · 24/04/2018 16:53

You are not bound by anyone else's schedule
Things remain where you left them
You can have what you want for dinner
You get all of the bed to yourself
You don't have to tidy up after someone who is perfectly capable to tidying up after themselves
You don't have to have to constantly shout 'I can't hear you' to someone who insists on talking to you from another room
You do have to consult anyone else on decor
You chose what you watch on telly

So many things.

I love DH but I loved living on my own, I was equally as happy as I am now

Good luck with your new life, it's going to be amazing, the world has infinite possibilities and there is nothing to stop you exploring any of them!

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Xenia · 24/04/2018 16:54

It has taken me nearly 60 years to achieve it (and I don't count living with a child at home as living at home by the way - you need to wait until they get to university for that) and it is heaven on earth. I have never in my life even now had as much of just my own company as I end up getting.

Also if you want someone after you split up just find another man if prefer to live was a couple with someone.

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ghostyslovesheets · 24/04/2018 16:55

oh and not having to fake interest in boring shit

such as: Guitar music, front splitters, dump valves, 2" aluminum troughs, motorbikes I'm looking at you exH

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Haffiana · 24/04/2018 16:55

You can finally have the space to find out who you are and what you want out of life.

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Uniquack · 24/04/2018 16:56

Sleeping diagonally across the bed! Surely can't just be me

No, not just you Grin.

I also left an abusive relationship, and it's just me and my DTDs. I've been very happily single for 5 years now. It's wonderful. Do what you want when you want, not have to answer to anyone or ask permission for anything. You have an entire bed to yourself without a sweaty body next to you. No arguments or someone trying to control you. And best of all - no walking on eggshells 24/7 in case you accidentally say something to upset someone.

You'll be absolutely fine, and will enjoy the freedom of just being yourself Grin.

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IDSNeighbour · 24/04/2018 16:56

Absolutely everything.

I honestly can't think of a single negative. I have never and could never live with someone else (as an adult that is - obviously I didn't raise myself in splendid isolation!).

Own space, own choice of decor, times, foods, activities, music, tv. The feeling of coming into your own house and closing the door on the world. Not needing to close the bathroom door. Being as clean as tidy or as dirty and messy as you like. Being as noisy or as quiet as you like.

I'm a reasonably social person out and about but I can't cope with having other people in my house for more than a day or so.

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Ceinwen2 · 24/04/2018 16:57

Same as everyone else, really. Freedom. No-one telling you you are doing things wrong. Have whatever you want on the TV. It is important to get out, though, otherwise evenings spent with just the fridge to interact with can cause weight problems.

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Springtrolls · 24/04/2018 16:58

You have the bed to yourself

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TERFousBreakdown · 24/04/2018 16:59

Total freedom!

And nobody hogging the bathroom, ever. Yes, I grew up with several sisters and went straight into all female flatshares.

Also: no need to tidy up after yourself until you actually have time to (or have stupidly decided to invite your mum/boss/... for dinner).

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MaudlinMews · 24/04/2018 17:00

but surely if you have a DD then you'll not be living alone? Or has she left home?

if you mean living without a partner then the following should help:

  • no sharing a bed - bliss! Nobody snatching the covers or ruining the clean sheets. Having a duvet tog that suits only you.
  • having space in the wardrobes/drawers for your own stuff and only your stuff.
  • waking up and going to bed when you want to.
  • not having to tiptoe around the bedroom in the dark for fear of waking other half.
  • an en-suite to yourself.
  • you choose where to go on holiday.
  • you choose your friends.
  • no annoying in-laws to put up with!
  • a healthier diet and lifestyle probably!


it's horrible for a week but after that you'll love it.
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Springtrolls · 24/04/2018 17:01

Sorry posted too soon lol
Come and go without a million questions
Eat what u want every night
Decrease in food bills
Oh and energ for some reason
Watch what u want
No endless sports crap (unless u like it)
Play games for hours
Meet new and interesting people
Join happn
Listen to music that u like
Have everything as u like it

The question should really be what’s good about living with another adult 😂

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Kingsclerelass · 24/04/2018 17:01

men are REALLY wasteful - my food bill dropped by 75%. If I'm tired I can go to sleep at 8pm if I want. Watch what I like on telly, read trashy books without anyone sneering. Eat left overs - I LIKE cold meat & salad. Have flu in peace without him recoiling in disgust. Choose nicer colours for my walls, not have to stress over his birthday present. No snobbery about Tesco rather than Waitrose.

It's brilliant. I honestly think I will be single for ever.

Good luck OP, have a quiet relaxing ball Smile

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