When people read your message but don't reply

[mrssunshinexxx]

It's my absolute pet hate you know when you see th little blue ticks and no they have read it but choose not to reply. I know sometimes you don't always have time to reply but then hours... a day or 2 goes by and still nothing and you feel a pest for chasing it up?!

[Wolfiefan]

Depends who it is, why you're contacting them and how often you do so.

[Inarutneedhelp]

It’s worse when they don’t even open it and you know they have been online

[splendidisolation]

No I'm the opposite, amd I hate feeling the unspokeb pressure radiating from people like yourself, no offence!
Read messages and ticks are the bane of my life.

I'll reply when I feel like replying to you and not before. Equally, I dont care when others reply to me. If something is urgent I call them.

[Scuttlefunge]

See this is why I don’t send read receipts, nor does my messenger account show I’m online. I like people don’t get me wrong but I like to reply in my own time

[ReasonableLlama]

Depends what the other person is doing. I quite often read a message and forget for a few days.

How important is the message? Does the person have form for not replying to messages?

I have one friend who reads my “hi how are you” type messages and ignores them for a few days but is happily updating FB or twitter or whatever. I’m in the process of phasing him out TBH not that he’ll notice

[splendidisolation]

@ReasonableLlama
Those messages stress me out. You dont know how many other people are sending them similar messages. Its just irritating.
"Hi how are you?"
"Good how are you?"
"Good"
X 30
OK then!

General (and also quite lazy when you think about it) messages like that I dont send and dont bother to reply to.

Try being a bit more specific. "Hey what did you end up doing about X/how did things go with Y" that type of thing.

And then, just realise that some people dont feel the need for regular contact like that. Its not personal.

[StickThatInYourPipe]

I hate the last online and read receipt function. It’s so stalkery!

[N0tNowBernard]

Yes! There's someone in our family who regularly asks for favours which we help with where we can (childcare mainly.)

She will send a message and if we reply and agree to the favour, she replies straight away. If for any reason we say No on that occasion, she will just not reply at all. Not even to say thanks anyway.

Or if you send her a message about anything at all she generally doesn't reply (and you can see she's online!) She only seems to reply if you're agreeing to help her out.

[BMW6]

They will reply IF and WHEN they want to OP!
Stop being so pushy and demanding FGS.

[pasturesgreen]

It depends m I hardly ever open messages (text or fb, I'm not on WhatsApp) immediately as I don't like to then get into the long back and forth exchange that would invariably ensue.

Much better to read it after a bit and reply at my leisure. It's hardly ever a life and death situation, most things can wait an hour or so, and I offend people like you, OP, well, I'll try and live with it.

[NaughtToThreeSadOnions]

Depends what the text is. If it's just thinking of you/this piece of information/I'll be home at whatever time/can you do me a favour/do you want to meet up at some point. Then it doesn't even need a reply, don't even expect one. If they are going to answer then then they'll answer in their own time.

If it's a direct question about something that you need a response in a time frame then yes that can be annoying.

[MummaMinnie]

I agree splendid

[Guavaf1sh]

The blue tick system is so annoying for this very reason. It sows disharmony and suspicion amongst those with relaxed attitudes such as some of the responders above and those with micromanagement issues such as the OP

[Notreallyarsed]

Oh I fucking hate the ticks/delivered/read things, I turn them off whenever I can.

[BewareOfDragons]

My pet hate is people who complain that I didn't reply to their message right away ... after all ... they can see the blue tick that I read it!

Why? Because I work in a school and yes, I might take a quick look at my phone from time to time when messages come up, but that doesn't mean I have time to respond to messages that are social and not emergencies!! I would like to keep my job, thank you very much.

[RebeccatheOld]

Maybe, just maybe, they've read your message but don't have time to reply just then.

If you want an instant reply ring them.

[missyB1]

unfortunately both my adult sons do this to me, very annoying and sometimes quite hurtful.

[Rebeccaslicker]

I saw a cartoon called "a modern tragedy" which showed a text message saying something along the lines of "I had a great night, would love to see you again", then the three dots of doom... then nothing!

If I still had a paper clip icon I'd try and post it but mine has vanished

[Sensimilla]

People don't have time to be replying to messages all the time. People have to work, talk to the people they are actually WITH etc

[CodeineAndCornflakes]

Read messages and ticks are the bane of my life. I'll reply when I feel like replying to you and not before. Equally, I dont care when others reply to me. If something is urgent I call them

^this.

I hate the way social media and mobiles have trapped us with the 'convenience' of being contactable at all times.

[ReasonableLlama]

*Splendid
*
Good point but to be fair the messages I send are more substantial than just “hi how are you” - was just using an example.

[Shadow666]

I also on the other side of the fence. Mondays are manic for me, getting 4 kids ready for school and myself off to work, there's always a million things to do and I often get a bit stressed. Friend always texts me a "Hi, how's it going?" type of text on Monday mornings and then gets annoyed when I've read it but still not replied by lunchtime.

[chipscheeseandcurrysauce]

I either forget to reply, write a reply but forget to press send or I just can’t be bothered to reply.

[Nyx1]

if it's not work etc then you sound very demanding!

[Liiinoo]

For me that is the best thing about electronic communications - the fact that you can reply or not reply in your own time. I used to hate ringing people as I was concerned I might be disturbing them. So I wouldn't ring and we would lose touch. Now I can send a message and they get back to me when it suits them. Equally I don't have to reply at once if I'm busy/in a mood/having sex but can get back to them at my convenience.