Advanced search

to still be really annoyed about this woman?

(138 Posts)
Springersrock Mon 13-Mar-17 12:02:02

I had to take 15 year old DD shopping yesterday. She needed a black, zip up hoodie for PE at school and some foundation. Half hour, job I thought.

Trailed round the shops where she tried on and discarded god knows how many identical plain black hoodies before we ended up back where we started. My patience is now wearing thin

We then move on to the foundation. Should be easy enough, nip into Boots, except they didn't have her usual colour and brand.

We then barely look at and discard virtually every brand of foundation in the shop based on her friend has the same brand and it's rubbish/it will make her look orange, all the while bitching and moaning about rubbish shops and what a shithole we live in for forty-five-fecking minutes! Hanging on to my last shreds of patience, I suggest we go to the No7 counter and do the colour match thing.

DD - are you dumb?
Me - ...or benefit?....what did you just say?
DD - piss off.

At which point I lose my rag. I don't shout, but tell her through gritted teeth not to be so rude and that she has 5 minutes to make her mind up or I would be leaving the shop and she could buy her own "bloody foundation"

This woman then steps between us, turns her back to me and puts her arm round DD and asks if she's OK? DD shrugged her off and said yeah, she was fine.

Woman then turns to me and starts giving me a lecture about how I should be kinder to my daughter, that one day she'll leave home and I'll regret being so nasty.

I cut her off, politely and said we were fine. She then called me rude and that I should be ashamed of myself and that I was being abusive to DD. So I said, we'd been in the shop for 45 minutes, I was fed up with DD's rudeness and if she thought she could do a better job, to be my guest. Woman then huffed a bit, repeated I was rude and abusive, then walked off.

I'm still really annoyed about it. I don't think I did anything wrong, I didn't shout or rant or anything like that.

Also, DD now thinks she's the bees knees as I got told off.

GeillisTheWitch Mon 13-Mar-17 12:04:28

You didn't do anything wrong DD was being a madam and needed told. Some people just can't help interfering.

IamFriedSpam Mon 13-Mar-17 12:05:03

Assuming everything happened just as you said that woman sounds mad as a hatter.

FourFlapjacksPlease Mon 13-Mar-17 12:07:57

Blimey - I think you were extremely restrained with both DD and loopy interferer! If my DD told me to piss off she'd find her usual brand of foundation up her nostril!

Lespritdelsietanner Mon 13-Mar-17 12:10:19

YANBU. The woman clearly has unresolved issues or neuroses around mothers/daughter relationships that she chose to project on to you and your DD in that moment.

Springersrock Mon 13-Mar-17 12:12:43


It's the unfairness of it I think. I'm still really annoyed about it.

I had seen woman once or twice on our many laps of the make up counters so must have heard DD bitching and moaning

She made me look a dick head in front of DD as well.

How dare she?

Starlighter Mon 13-Mar-17 12:13:32

People need to kind their own business! She clearly has no experience of dealing with teenage girls yet - let's hope she gets a right madam when her time comes!

Oh and I hope your DD didn't get her foundation!

BasicBetty Mon 13-Mar-17 12:15:00


Caken Mon 13-Mar-17 12:16:24

YANBU, your DD was rude and ungrateful - you did well to last 45mins! The woman was an interfering busybody.

AwaywiththePixies27 Mon 13-Mar-17 12:17:51

No I think you were being rather restrained!

She'd have been told to mind her own business if if was me she'd tried 'telling off' after my child had just swore at me!

Moanyoldcow Mon 13-Mar-17 12:17:51

YADNBU - Jesus - I'd have lost my shit.

AwaywiththePixies27 Mon 13-Mar-17 12:18:50

Did she work there OP? Or just a random customer?

xStefx Mon 13-Mar-17 12:20:00

cheeky bitch

carteblah Mon 13-Mar-17 12:26:40

She sounds ridiculous and completely over the top. Wonder if she goes around looking for situations where she can play at 'hero'?

MackerelOfFact Mon 13-Mar-17 12:28:55

IMO you were being way TOO kind to her - I'd have thrown a tenner at her and gone and sat in Starbucks until she had finished her little diva strop, or told her to order it online!

The woman was being a rude and interfering busybody but you don't know her history - she might have lost her own DD, for example. She was being ridiculously unhelpful though.

WorkAccount Mon 13-Mar-17 12:31:10

IO think you were a saint, i would have told daughter "well makeup isn't essential we will come back another day when they have it in stock" and gone home.

shovetheholly Mon 13-Mar-17 12:31:28

" she has 5 minutes to make her mind up or I would be leaving the shop and she could buy her own "bloody foundation"

It strikes me that your answer may be to five her the money and let her go shopping by herself. It'll be a lot more fun for everyone, and at 15 she is surely more than old enough.

WorraLiberty Mon 13-Mar-17 12:35:36

I don't shout, but tell her through gritted teeth not to be so rude and that she has 5 minutes to make her mind up or I would be leaving the shop and she could buy her own "bloody foundation"

Sorry I couldn't get past ^^ that.

What the actual fuck is wrong with you? shock

You actually treated her to a foundation after she called you dumb and told you to piss off?


RubyRoseViolet Mon 13-Mar-17 12:36:42

Crikey! Of course you're not being over the top. Your DD was being extremely rude and deserved to be told off. The other woman was incredibly out of order to jump in and join in. If I were you I'd tell your DD to stop being so smug, and I'd refuse to buy the foundation the next time. It's totally unacceptable to be so rude especially when you were putting yourself out for her.

Soon2bC Mon 13-Mar-17 12:37:27

the woman is clearly a busy body. I would be fuming but i would be more cross at DD, I think you are way more controlled than i would be. If that had been me and she said piss off then i would have said OK turned around and walked to the car. I would have text her saying if you want a lift get to the car before i piss off completely

Sod giving her more time to choose and get bought foundation.

Crikey I am harsh!!!!

WorraLiberty Mon 13-Mar-17 12:38:51

And as much as the woman should have wound her neck in, she isn't the one who made you look like a dick head.

Your own daughter was the one who did that, by abusing you and still getting treated to make-up.

neonrainbow Mon 13-Mar-17 12:38:56

I think you should be more pissed off at your spoilt brat of a daughter. Why the fuck did you buy her make up after that?! No wonder she talks to you like shit!

RubyRoseViolet Mon 13-Mar-17 12:39:52

No, you're not Soon2bc, that's exactly the response that sort of behaviour requires.

Benedikte2 Mon 13-Mar-17 12:41:22

OP really unfair/unacceptable to undermine your position with your daughter.
I think you should tell your daughter the majority of mum's on MN think your frustration with her unreasonable and rude behaviour is justified.
Some days one is just not in the mood for shopping and I maybe DD was having one of those days? Sounds like she is (naturally) anxious about getting these simple items "right" in order to fit in with her contemporaries at school etc.
Have a Cuppa (or wine) and put your feet up -- you're an ok mum, it's official.

starfishmummy Mon 13-Mar-17 12:42:51

If someone put her arm round my child and placed hefself in between us then I would be telling her to get her hands off them or I would be calling the police.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: