I have 2 DDs, every Christmas and birthday MiL will ring up and ask what they would like.
Every Christmas and birthday I give her a range of ideas (she gives me a budget and I'll give her suggestions within that). Every Christmas and birthday she'll then tell me she doesn't want to buy any of the things I've suggested and will buy something totally different.
Both DDs have hobbies and interests which are a gold mine of present ideas - DD2 is into horse riding and needed new jodhpurs, or her riding school does gift vouchers for hacks or lessons, etc, etc. DD1 is massively arty and is currently doing her art GCSE and loves sketch books or any art stuff really.
At Christmas MiL didn't want to buy anything we suggested and bought them some make up gift sets (nail varnish, etc). DD2 doesn't wear any make up. DD1 does but she has her own brands and colours that suit her. Both girls were really polite, thanked her, were fairly enthusiastic and wrote her thank you letters after Christmas
Anyway, DD2 has a birthday coming up and MiL called last night to find out what DD would like. DH gave her some ideas, and again, she didn't want to buy those things. DH asked her why she kept asking if she was just going to ignore anything we said. It ended up in a bit of an argument - our kids are ungrateful and spoilt and she didn't know why she bothered.
Thing is, she never listens, she's never really bothered to get to know our kids, she's just not interested in them really (DH's older sister was always the favoured child, and now her kids are the favoured grandchildren) so she doesn't know that DD2 doesn't ever wear make up and that at 15 DD1 saves up her pocket money to buy MAC.
They are polite, they say thanks, write letters, phone her, etc, but it does upset them - they've both said "does Nanny know us at all?" Especially when they see their cousins opening stuff like computer games they've asked for
I just get a bit fed up with it all. They'd never say anything, but they're not grateful in all honesty, and I can't say I blame them.
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AIBU?
to think they're not ungrateful, just disappointed?
105 replies
Blinkybell · 12/02/2017 11:22
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