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to think that most women would rather have a girl/girls than a boy/boys?

(444 Posts)
jellysandwich Thu 20-Jun-13 14:17:01

I have read so many posts with pregnant mothers who are upset that they are having a ds and in real life I find that mothers who have all boys or boys first, tend to denigrate them to mums of girls and put their daughters on pedestals. Mums of girls tend to not mind having no boys whereas all boy mums seem to feel sad that they have only boys. I have never come across any women who only wanted boy(s).

Am I right in thinking that most women want to have girls and wouldn't mind having all girls if they have more than one child, whereas boys are almost always seen as second best and not the desired choice of most women?

ElectricSoftParade Thu 20-Jun-13 14:18:31

Not for me. DS came along first and I was (stupidly) upset for a couple of days when I was told I was having DD. Soon got over that though smile.

FryOneFatManic Thu 20-Jun-13 14:19:26

Er, I have one of each, and was simply happy they had been born healthy each time.

DS is the younger, and is a nice well behaved boy. I would never be denigrating him to anyone.

havingamadmoment Thu 20-Jun-13 14:19:39

I have four girls and one boy, I dont think i would have been upset to have had 5 boys BUT I am pleased to have had some girls - if that makes any sense. I would have felt the same about having 5 girls and no ds.

paperclips Thu 20-Jun-13 14:19:41


BarbarianMum Thu 20-Jun-13 14:20:29

<<all boy mums seem to feel sad that they have only boys>>

Says who? I'm sure I would have adored girls if I'd had them but I always imagined that I'd be a mother to boys and when that proved the case I felt nothing but relief (and profound love, of course).

FryOneFatManic Thu 20-Jun-13 14:20:34

In fact, I've seen quite a few posts on here from mothers of boys only who are very happy with their DCs.

DoJo Thu 20-Jun-13 14:20:52

YABU - wanted a boy, had a boy, would want another buy if I had the choice.

nameuschangeus Thu 20-Jun-13 14:21:04


MrsTerryPratchett Thu 20-Jun-13 14:21:17

I know someone who was DYING to have a boy. All those MILs on the threads about spoiled, lazy, feckless DHs came from somewhere. There are plenty of boys on pedestals.

fuzzywuzzy Thu 20-Jun-13 14:21:37

No I dont think so, everyone has preferences but I dont know any woman who has only wanted girls.

tumbletumble Thu 20-Jun-13 14:21:42

In my experience (obviously this is a massive generalisation), before the baby is born women want a girl and men want a boy. Maybe they picture doing activities together and think they will be able to relate more to their own sex? BUT when the baby comes along it often seems to switch. I know lots of families where the mum is close to her DS and the DD is a daddy's girl!

Asheth Thu 20-Jun-13 14:21:42

I have three boys and think I'm the luckiest mum ever!

joencaitlinsmum Thu 20-Jun-13 14:22:03

I wanted just boys, and thought #2 was a another boy so very shocked when they said it was a girl!!

Wouldnt swop her now though but if I was to have #3 then would prefer another boy smile

hellsbellsmelons Thu 20-Jun-13 14:22:26

I think everyone is different.
I got my little girl on the fist attempt so didn't have any more.
Had I had a boy first I probably would have had another one as I did want a girl.
But... now we are in the teenage years, mmmmm......

AllDirections Thu 20-Jun-13 14:24:08

I have 3 girls and I'm more than happy. I don't feel sad about not having any boys but I can't say how I would have felt about not having daughters if I'd had all boys.

TapselteerieO Thu 20-Jun-13 14:24:14

YANBU to hold the opinion, but I don't think it is true, or that I've not experienced it.

I had a dd, then a ds, I am probably much harder on my dd because she is the oldest.

If you are after anecdotal evidence, when dd was in her cot in hospital, a day after she was born, an auxiliary asked me if I had a boy or girl, when I told her I'd had a girl she turned to the other auxiliary and said clearly in front of me "all girls are bitches".

paperclips Thu 20-Jun-13 14:24:46

Sorry DS stole my mouse. I honestly did not mind at all- I just wanted a healthy baby. I got a boy, he's super. Little boys are lovely. Little girls are lovely.

One of each is supposedly the "ideal" but I would be quite happy to have only boys. I quite like the idea of me and my boys. Or of having sons who are close to each other as they get older.

Floggingmolly Thu 20-Jun-13 14:26:18

Mums who have boys tend to denigrate them to mums of girls
How many people were in this straw poll of yours? It's utter codswallop.

DuchessFanny Thu 20-Jun-13 14:26:42

I only wanted boys and am very lucky to have three, if I could guarantee the next one would be a boy, I'd go for a fourth !!

I'm one of a few Mums with all boys and only one of them expressed a desire for her third to be a girl ( it was a boy !)

Celador Thu 20-Jun-13 14:26:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gruffalocake Thu 20-Jun-13 14:27:09

I think tumble tumble has it spot on.
Pre DC I imagined a girl simply because that is what I could relate to. Now with 2 boys I LOVE it and am unsure I would want a girl as dc3 because we have such a fab dynamic with the boys. I'd prefer a ds3 but I know dh would like a dd so he can have the same experience I have had with two doting boys smile

RoxyFox211 Thu 20-Jun-13 14:27:10

I was hoping for/expecting a boy at first and was upset when i found out we were having a little girl, but typically i wouldnt change her for anything now and now would love more girls.

PattieOfurniture Thu 20-Jun-13 14:27:16

I only have boys, my preference was to have boys, I was secretly hoping when pg ds1 and ds2 were boys.
I think I'd be a crap mum to girls, I don't know why.
It would have been nice to dress them pretty and do their hair nice. But I'm so glad I've got my boys. I'm not having anymore dc either.

Yonididnaedaethat Thu 20-Jun-13 14:28:20

I have 1 DD and 2 DS, when dd goes out and it's just the boys the house is pure blisssmile.

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