How to tell employee they smell

[Dingdong99]

We've just taken in a new person at work

He's 23, and I've noticed he has a bit of bad breath, but the bigger problem is the body odour

It's a client facing role and I get that it's hot but still

I feel bad but need to say something. How would you deliver this without giving him a complex / making me hate him forever!

You'd be hauled up for lying tbf.
Quite rightly.

It's terrible advice. If you think it's the right advice you need training.

Don't do this! If it's as bad as you say, everyone will know exactly who you mean, including him.

Maybe when you're in a room together, comment on the smell in a lighthearted way: "phew it's about whiffy in here, maybe it's me, it's so warm at the moment isn't it, I'm having to shower twice a day!" Hopefully he will take the hint.

Unless it is the staff policy to be washed and wear clean clothes everyday (unlikely!) it's ridiculous to state this, it's also a sure fire way to ridicule the person. It is terrible advice on many levels.

I had to do this once with a colleague of mine because my Manager was too scared too! I pulled them to one side and said politely, 'we've had a small comment from a customer that they could smell perspiration odour and it's not nice for the customer to experience this. I just wanted to let you know personally'

Something to soften the blow

Can you do a mass email reminding everyone of personal hygiene, sandwiched between other business? Not to single him out.

Don't say this if it's not true.

I've had to do this, it was awkward for both of us but the only way to approach it is directly, privately and quickly.

I just took him aside somewhere no one could eavesdrop and said that I had noticed an odour and wanted to make him aware as soon as possible so he could address it. He took it on board and thanked me,

Don't say someone else has told you, that will make him think people are talking about him being smelly which is a bit horrible.

Pre fixed with a comment about current warm weather.

I worked at a college. We had problems with some student's hygiene. Best approach ever, was telling the student in a private room that they're getting a bit smelly. So brushing their teeth, washing armpits and using deodrant would help. It was direct and honest. It worked. That student listened and came back smelling nice

Former colleague dealt with something like this, the ponky offender was female, with a matey comment about how us larger ladies (of which she was proudly one) suffer in this weather.

Broad brush it was called in my time. I agree, it's always the sign of an utterly incompetent/cowardly manager.

The irony is whilst the rest of a team become self-conscious, the 'culprit' (of whatever the issue) tends to believe it's actually not directed at them at all because (inside their own head) they are super-efficient, super-dilligent, super-polite, super-clean etc. etc. etc.

I've never had a tonsil stone I'm my life. Are they common?

Nope, never send a "round robin" email to everyone when there's a problem with just one person. You'll just annoy everyone and the person who it's directed at will probably ignore it and assume it's meant for someone else.

It needs tackling head on in as nice a way as possible.

I say that as someone who was at the receiving end of such "advice". It was my second job, I was young, and I had let personal hygiene lapse. I had no idea that I smelled. My previous workplace and colleagues had never mentioned it. But first week at the new job, the "big boss" called me into his office and "reminded" me to wash daily, wear fresh clothes, etc. He ended the meeting by saying "You're a good worker and it would be a shame to have to let you go!", so making it abundantly clear that I either dealt with the problem or they'd sack me!

I stayed working there for many years afterwards, getting various promotions, etc - never a word was said about it again, but I always made sure I was fresh and clean! Good result/outcome for all in the end!

I think you just have to be upfront , send an email to him

"In this warm weather, personal hygeine is doubly important for everyone. We remind all staff to wash or shower and clean teeth every morning, and wear a clean shirt every day."

I don't think he will question colleagues "Did you get this email?"

Small business owner here. Talk to them at the end of the day. Say honestly that you've noticed their body odour recently, and that it is quite noticeable to others as well. As they're customer facing, they need to do something about it.

Awkward as shit for you and for them, but best dealt with honestly and candidly. Don't patronise with tips about washing etc.

As others (with sense) have said, keep it direct, factual, brief, and private.

I would just add to do it at the end of the day so he doesn't have to be self-conscious for the rest of the day.

Cross-posted with Bluebells. :)

HR don't do that. It's a Managers role.

It wouldn’t be odd at all! it would be an excellent way to do it. Especially as part of a shit sandwich.

you are actually helping him. He has an issue that is easily rectified, if someone would just say it. If you are breezy, he won’t be offended.

Unfortunately there are certain disorders that can cause malodour.
Some of them incurable, TMAU is one of them and it can cause bad breath and strong body odour.
People can have washed their hair and body thoroughly, wear expensive antiperspirant, have brushed and flossed their teeth and put on freshly laundered clothes and they still smell.
It is a source of great paranoia and distress and it is a real health problem.
TMAU (trimethylaminuria) is diagnosed through the NHS.
Please be aware that some people are not lazy and are trying very bloody hard.

Those saying 'why dont his family tell them'...my DS is nearly 21, home from uni, i nagged him for a couple of years re body odour, bought products, his attitude was that I was too fussy, anti perspirant not good for you, general hippy type stuff. Hes better now but still scruffy and barely brushes his hair. I think he probably sleeps in the t shirt hs had on all day. Im hoping when he gets a job he'll have to spruce up but he might listen to an employer more than me.

I have a very smelly colleague, but I think it’s due to his size. He’s never BO-ey but very definitely bollocky/bummy smelling…his chair stinks and if he’s standing near you whilst you’re sitting down it’s gag-inducing. His breath is horrendous and he has thick yellow plaque on his teeth. He’s been asked by the MD to make more of an effort (also doesn’t shave, doesn’t brush his hair, wears creased clothes etc) but it’s fallen on deaf ears which leaves everyone in an awkward position really

Blimey! Some appalling advice here! How to make somebody feel utterly shite about themselves. Not to mention finding yourself on the wrong end of a bullying complaint.

I am reminded of a training session regarding the understanding of poverty that I attended with a fairly senior Civil Servant who grew up in a very deprived home. She didn't even have a toothbrush as a child, let alone toothpaste or shower gel or shampoo. Not everyone is a deliberately lazy soap dodger. Some people were just not exposed to the standards that we think are normal and as a result are still struggling to learn.

As this chap is new I would take him to one side and gently suggest that his new work environment might be warmer than the last place that he worked in. And that perhaps his current personal hygiene routine might need some review as a result. Perhaps his washing powder, shower gel or deodorant are no longer effective? And I would offer help and support if he wanted it. Like fuck would I shame or embarrass him. And if a member of my team did that they would have me to deal with.

And to give another perspective, my Mum had an acquaintance at one of the social groups that she attended before Covid resulted in it being closed. A lady in her late 70s who looked perfectly dressed and groomed. But she smelled of BO really badly.

After my Mum and some other lady members gently talked to her it became apparent that her husband - a controlling arsehole - wouldn't let her use the washing machine as he thought it was a waste of energy. As much as she washed herself, she wasn't allowed to wash her clothes in her own home, so had to keep wearing worn clothes. My Mum and the other ladies worked with her to arrange a system where she could bring her dirty clothes in and her friends would launder them for her.

There was no judgement, just support. I don't wish ill on anyone but he has since died and she now uses her washing machine as often as she likes!