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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Almost 70 mass unmarked child graves discovered by ITV News investigation into mother and baby homes

67 replies

IwantToRetire · 22/08/2025 16:57

Nearly 70 babies are buried in mass unmarked graves after dying in a Salvation Army-run institution for unmarried mothers in Newcastle, an ITV News investigation has discovered.

Hopedene Maternity Home operated between 1950 and 1973 in the Elswick area of the city and has been described by families affected as a "place of cruelty" and "like a prison".

Between 1949 and the mid-1970s, thousands of unmarried women were sent to state and religious institutions across Britain - where infants were taken from their mothers for adoption simply because they were born outside of wedlock.

Others died through poor care. Our year-long investigation into this scandal has already exposed allegations that sick or premature children were left to die as they weren’t deemed "desirable" for adoption.

Last year, we revealed nearly 200 infants who died at eight mother and baby homes are buried in mass plots in ten different cemeteries across England.

https://www.itv.com/news/2025-08-21/itv-news-investigation-discovers-almost-70-mass-unmarked-baby-graves

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deadpan · 22/08/2025 17:05

I had no idea this went on in England, we've obviously seen it Ireland way too much over the years. It doesn't bare thinking about the suffering of the women and babies.

IwantToRetire · 22/08/2025 17:14

I think what is worse is that for so long (probably not just the UK) unmarried mothers were really badly treated and shamed.

And only some of this came to light after the book got published about all the children stolen from their mothers and sent to Australia, Africa and Canada, often by "christian" organisation.

Britain is perhaps the only country in the world to have exported vast numbers of its children. An estimated 150,000 children were sent over a 350-year period to Virginia, Australia, New Zealand, Canada, and what was then Southern Rhodesia, now Zimbabwe.

Australia was the main destination in the final wave between 1945 and 1974.

There were twin purposes - to ease the population of orphanages in the UK and to boost the population of the colonies.

But the shameful institutional decision not to even give the babies that dies proper burials is also horrifying.

Although mass graves with no names was standard practice in the UK for "paupers well into the 20th century.

But for the mothers of the babies so cruel.

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pontefractals · 22/08/2025 17:30

An old family friend was born in a mother and baby home n England shortly after WW2 but was adopted. Years later, researching his history, he found out that the remains of multiple babies had been discovered in a pit in the grounds. He was haunted by his past (I think he always felt that his adoptive family were more interested in being seen to do good than in actually adopting a child) and eventually drank himself to death, and I know that the knowledge that he was "one of the lucky ones" weighed heavily on him.

myplace · 22/08/2025 17:37

A friend was adopted from such a place. Her mum was really traumatised by her experiences.

However, mass unmarked graves aren't unknown. We need to judge by the standards of the time and examine those standards, rather than the tragic incidences themselves.

It is hard to imagine how recent dignified care for stillborn or miscarried babies became expected.
It’s one of those barbaric hangovers that surprise you.

IAmNotASheep · 22/08/2025 17:41

There was no financial support for women in those days
Families threw women out or at the least refused support and put them in these homes

If you had a baby and were unmarried getting work was impossible either because no one would employ you or there was no one to look after your baby

I have a relative that we recently found out about born in one of these institutions in London.

In terms of unmarked graves if a baby wasn’t baptised they would be buried in unconsecrated ground with others. If there was no family money for burial they would be buried with others or in groups and generally unmarked. It’s extremely unkind of course but that’s how it was done in those days

Im so pleased many now are being given the respect they deserve

myplace · 22/08/2025 18:46

Mid 80s parents weren’t consulted about disposal of remains.

Almost 70 mass unmarked child graves discovered by ITV News investigation into mother and baby homes
ArabellaScott · 22/08/2025 22:05

Oh, god, I thought this was Tuam. Another one. Unconscionable.

TempestTost · 23/08/2025 02:12

myplace · 22/08/2025 18:46

Mid 80s parents weren’t consulted about disposal of remains.

Practices around death used to be much more practical. There were many people, especially babies, who died, and not much money to bury them. Poor adults also were often buried in the same kinds of graves.

IwantToRetire · 23/08/2025 02:47

I did say up thread that mass graves were not uncommon.

But this is about women already pushed to the edge of society, and with the implication that more babies died than would be expected in normal circumstances.

And then not even a plaque.

And also some women who were told their baby had died only to find out years later it had been stolen and sent to some outpost of British colonial life.

And it was in one of those episodes of a tv series about tracing lost relatives, that a woman who thought she had arranged for her son to be looked after whilst looking for a new job and home after the father of the child disappeared, came to fetch him and they just said he had been adopted.

I dont think these Salvation Army homes were quite as harsh as the Magdalene Laundries, but the women were certainly made to feel they had no worth or rights.

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cariadlet · 23/08/2025 03:56

So sad. Like others, I've been aware for some time of how badly young mothers and their babies were treated in Ireland up until the very recent past but hadn't realised that many of the same things were happening in England too.

This stood out for me: "Others died through poor care. Our year-long investigation into this scandal has already exposed allegations that sick or premature children were left to die as they weren’t deemed "desirable" for adoption.
Last year, we revealed nearly 200 infants who died at eight mother and baby homes are buried in mass plots in ten different cemeteries across England."

Mum4MrA · 23/08/2025 04:46

Neonatal care for sick or premature newborns was in its infancy when I was at med school in the early 90s. Surfactant, pre-birth steroids, UV therapy for neonatal jaundice, and fetal medicine have had a huge impact on survival of babies. I’m not condoning the mass graves or the appalling way unmarried mothers and their babies were treated but I remember the stigma attached to them.

Nugg · 23/08/2025 05:04

I feel so fortunate that my own mother was born into a GOOD unmarried mothers home in Yorkshire and my grandmother met a lovely man who was keen to adopt her and give her the best life

Tallisker · 23/08/2025 09:31

And as ever, the men who cause the pregnancies get away scot free. No stigma for unmarried fathers 😡

IwantToRetire · 23/08/2025 17:03

Tallisker · 23/08/2025 09:31

And as ever, the men who cause the pregnancies get away scot free. No stigma for unmarried fathers 😡

Yes, of course.

And in a strange way talking about the terrible circumstances so many women did and still do find themselves, but only in terms of their suffering, does off course mean men aren't publicly shamed.

Nor the institutions made to face up to their part in maintaining this anti woman sentiment.

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IwantToRetire · 23/08/2025 17:04

Nugg · 23/08/2025 05:04

I feel so fortunate that my own mother was born into a GOOD unmarried mothers home in Yorkshire and my grandmother met a lovely man who was keen to adopt her and give her the best life

Thanks for sharing.

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lcakethereforeIam · 23/08/2025 23:08

Many of these mothers would have been little more than children themselves, possibly abused children.

I read a book years ago, the People of the Abyss by Jack London. His experience of being 'homeless' in London. He was pretty scathing about the help the Salvation Army offered to the destitute. They earned their handouts by enduring hours of prayer and preaching. Leaving them little time to do anything else to try to improve their situation. Although this was just after the turn of the century and the Sally Army must have become a little more compassionate in the intervening decades.

AmadeustheAlpaca · 24/08/2025 01:48

I think many people nowadays don't realise how scandalous and shocking having a baby out of wedlock was regarded not that long ago. Sex before marriage was frowned upon in case it resulted in an unplanned baby and it's heartbreaking to think about what these mothers and their poor babies suffered as a result of society's views. Women were incarcerated in psychiatric hospitals because of unplanned pregnancies due to the thought process that you must be mad to have sex in a situation where you would become a social pariah if you had a baby.
I am old enough to remember being told that girls who had sex before marriage (or at least before getting engaged) were sluts and whores and unmarried mothers were treated very differently to married mothers in maternity wards.
I must admit that I see all the threads on Mumsnet about women planning babies with their boyfriends and partners who they are not married to and it makes me think how dramatically things have changed from forty years ago when I was pregnant.

HoppingPavlova · 24/08/2025 04:04

To be fair, such things were not limited to institutions/unmarried mothers. I had a relative who had a full term stillbirth in the 70’s. They were married, husband was at the hospital and they were comfortably off and would have happily paid for a funeral. The hospital just had a brief discussion with the husband only stating they would take care of it, and best not to talk about it with his wife as was best for moving on, obviously we know that’s not correct but it was ‘of the time’.

Decades later my relative wanted to know what had happened to her baby and investigated. It was mass cremated with others and ashes disposed of along with medical waste. That’s a baby of a married woman in a ‘nice suburb’. I knew someone else, unrelated to me, who was in a similar position socially at the time in the 70’s who also investigated their full term stillbirth birth thinking they would have been buried, and wanting to find out where and visit, who was told exactly the same. So, some of this wasn’t about stigmatised women, but was just a product of the times, it was based on practicality with no emotion.

Dutchhouse14 · 24/08/2025 12:24

Burials or cremations of still born babies was not sensitively handled until relatively recently.
Unmarked or papers graves for adults was also common practice.
But the really issue is did young mothers and their babirs die due to neglect and lack of proper medical care? The higher than average death rate strongly suggests they didn't receive the proper care and the home was negligent and cruel.
Also were the deaths and their causes accurately recorded?
It's certainly a story worth reporting and investigating. The treatment of these young women would have left them with deep psychological scars and from the report many of the children themselves were also badly impacted.
Even in the1980s unmarried mothers (always the women) were frowned upon.
My cousin had her first child when unmarried in 1983 and it caused quite a hoohah. The Catholic Church refused to baptise her baby as it was born in sin.

Treaclewell · 24/08/2025 14:04

My friend's married mother had a stillbirth of a much longed for daughter. The doctor looked at her and said "What did you do to get rid of this baby?" and they took her away and had her buried in another person's grave. They knew the cemetery, but not the grave. The shame she was made to feel she passed on to her two year old son, who caused the loss by demanding to be carried. Presumably she was baptised as she had a name. That was in the early 50s. The attitude was vicious. My friend occasionally thinks of investigating the records at the hospital, whenever cases of illicit adoption scams are in the news.

myplace · 24/08/2025 14:28

@Dutchhouse14 outcomes might be slightly worse because of who ended up there. More likely to be girls who weren’t well looked after anyway, already experiencing poor treatment due to pregnancy. Possibly an earlier attempt at a homemade abortion.

Not all of course. But I think girls in better off homes had a better set of options, even if only a hushed up adoption.

SinnerBoy · 24/08/2025 17:38

Crikey, this is an awful thing. Elswick's not far from me, I looked in the local papers and not a peep. People who say young, unemployed mothers ought to be kept in homes with no benefits need to watch the programme and have a long, hard look at themselves.

IwantToRetire · 24/08/2025 20:20

But the really issue is did young mothers and their babirs die due to neglect and lack of proper medical care? The higher than average death rate strongly suggests they didn't receive the proper care and the home was negligent and cruel.

Also were the deaths and their causes accurately recorded?

Sad Angry

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IwantToRetire · 05/09/2025 01:30

I meant to tape these but forgot. Although both presenters really irritate me.

Some personal stories.

Long Lost Family: The Mother and Baby Home Scandal
A deeply moving special shares the stories of women who, as unmarried teenagers, were sent to England’s Mother & Baby Homes, and who now search for the children taken for adoption.
https://www.itv.com/watch/long-lost-family-the-mother-and-baby-home-scandal/10a6477

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