This Girl Can

[Sittinginthesun]

I don't often venture onto this Board, but would be very interested in your opinions on the This Girl Can campaign.

I understand the idea and aims, although I'm not terribly impressed by the idea of "girls" being worried about getting red sweaty faces, and therefore not exercising or taking part in sport.

DS1's school have sent an email explaining that the girls will be participating in a This Girl Can event over three lessons next week. The handful of boys in DS1's class will be in lessons as usual.

DS is furious! He argues that there are plenty of non active boys in his class who don't take part in sport.

I'm too hot to think this through properly, but wondered whether this subject has been covered on here yet?

It is also extremely annoying to be told that no matter how loudly you say you had no interest in competitive sport it is really because you are conforming to gendered pressures.

I don't see what relevance this has to acornsandnuts explaining the girls at her daughter's school felt so uncomfortable with the comments boys were making about their bodies both at the time and on social media afterwards that they had to take part in their "sports day" in lesson time instead? These girls and countless others like them are being put off sport because of the comments and judgement of their bodies they're facing and having to read on social media afterwards.

It wasn't. It was in reply to YetAnotherSpartacus posts.

Which was in reply to mine, replying to hers. I don't know why you're always so keen to dismiss misogyny and sexism girls face, never actually make any comments about it except to try to reduce it such as there.

I wasn't addressing your comments or hers. I was replying to YetAnotherSpartacus and agreeing with her and her experiences. Or are experiences only valid if they meet your set criteria that life is crap if you are female?

What a ridiculous comment.

I completely agree YetAnotherSparacus. It is also extremely annoying to be told that no matter how loudly you say you had no interest in competitive sport it is really because you are conforming to gendered pressures.

I wonder if it is any more annoying that being accused of not conforming to gendered stereotypes because I loved sports .

Some people were even more aghast because I said I couldn't give a flying wotsit whether any boy or man commented or stared or made sexist remarks. Not my problem if boys are immature. No way would I let my life be dictated by a bunch of eternal adolescents.

The best education we can give girls, whether it is about sports or sex or anything, is do what you want and tell the boys to bugger off if they don't like it.

My father was an athletics coach as well as a teacher - he used to get frustrated with the crap women got for competing in the 70s and hated how confident girls could become less confident and drop out. He didn't like wonderful athletes being somehow pressured not to continue competing after puberty as often happens at my school.

I remember him pointing out to me the awful negative comments of the Williams sisters and martina N - they were so often spoken of negatively and got abuse rather that seeing them for the awesome sports women. And he hated how school girls could get the same type of rubbish.

Anyhow I don't want to out me or him but he trained women to national level. We received letters from women athletes after his death about how he helped instil confidence in them.

Anyway just want to say he appreciated female and male athletes so I got loads of awesome women role models - anyhow really good for my confidence and to appreciate the ridiculous barriers in place.

Also discus throwers - the rubbish they got for not being a female form - well my father wouldn't have any of that either.

Some people were even more aghast because I said I couldn't give a flying wotsit whether any boy or man commented or stared or made sexist remarks. Not my problem if boys are immature. No way would I let my life be dictated by a bunch of eternal adolescents.

It's great you felt confident enough to ignore this kind of sexist nonsense and see them as risible but not all women or girls can. It's far harder for girls at school who are already subject to sexist comments, objectification and suggestions their worth is their appearance to ignore comments made not only whilst they're taken part in sport but continuing on social media afterwards. We need to empower girls to do what they want but challenge the objectification and misogyny they face, in all forms. It shouldn't be something girls and women have to learn to just put up with.

NoLoveofMine: I take your point entirely and agree, which is why we need to educate girls "to empower" them as you say. Yes, objectification and misogyny should be challenged - I took that as a given, which is why I didn't even mention it - but until we turn our adolescent boys and men into fully thinking human beings who treat girls as fully thinking human beings like them - bugger off works quite well as plan B.

I should add this wasn't just me being confident. I wasn't an anomaly. All my girl friends were the same. Maybe it's a generational thing - I am from a second wave feminism era where we just did our thing and boys could go whistle.

As we famously said "a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle", though actually we never seemed short of boyfriends. Wonder why?

I agree with a lot of that whoputthecatout and also admire such an attitude. I like to think my friends and I are similar when it comes to boys generally - the comments about us from many we've known due to our challenging their misogyny also show that - but was thinking here in terms of sport and sexist comments aimed at girls over their bodies when they play (and following playing). This isn't something I can say how I'd react to as I go to a girls' school, so have only ever played around girls save for sometimes in the park when younger. I'd like to say I'd play anyway and not care less what they were saying but know it's easy to say that and not so easy in practice. Though it was never acceptable I do wonder if social media makes it more difficult - the comments not only being at the time but then aimed at girls afterwards. It wouldn't be nice at all for girls to read - I know myself that though I've learnt to treat them with disdain (and just unfriend many of those aiming the comments) that it's unpleasant to read misogynist comments about yourself from boys and when it's there in front of you it's difficult not to take it in and have it imprinted on your mind for some time.

My friends and I are definitely all confident and try to challenge misogyny from boys as much as we can. As with you, we also all have good friends who are boys who are also excellent feminist allies!

I'd love all girls to be in a position to mock misogyny and see the boys and men who spout it as the risible people they are but I'd even more love them not to face it in the first place.

I like their campaigns and I find it very motivating. Perhaps woman could be used, but 18yr old females don't tend to think of themselves as women, in my experience.

I woukd explain to your son why focussing on jeeping girls in sport is important.

Its not just about getting people active. Its about tackling the reasons girls give up.

Sorry i meant 'alot' of girls give up.