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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

What would you do if a university student wanted to bring her newborn to class?

368 replies

camaleon · 21/01/2014 17:04

That is really. I have to make a decision regarding this. I need advice. I want to accommodate this student as much as possible but I am very aware of disrupting other students' learning experience.
What would you do?

OP posts:
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Minnieisthedevilmouse · 24/01/2014 13:46

Unsure if covered, why does it matter if it's the mother please?

Would you be happy for dad, or any relative to bring a newborn in?

If not why not?

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 13:47

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 24/01/2014 13:48

YY, this is what I am thinking.

I know that age 18-22, which is when most people go to university, is a time when things like depression and anxiety aren't that uncommon, and I believe (could be wrong) that it's also when some other mental health issues tend to start showing if you have them - and if you're badly depressed, sometimes it can be extremely hard to talk and easier to write.

Obviously there's a flipside in that you need to really work to make it feel like a network, a community where people know each other and that would be extremely difficult to do purely online. But you could try.

Re. bums on seats - when I was at university, if you were persistently absent without permission, you could be fined! Never happened to me (not for lack of absence, for lack of being a cocky git about skiving, which tended to be the real reason they'd bother to fine you). However, my lectures weren't mandatory. Where I am now, I take attendance and they are required to attend. If they persistently truant, they can get chucked out. I'm not sure what I think of it.

Something I find very difficult is that I am supposed to mark them on participation in seminars. Obviously that's important and it's not fair not to contribute. But with some of them, it clearly is shyness. So I tend to put them in groups, then eavesdrop the quiet ones, and then I'll say something like 'right, Jane, you had a brilliant point about x just now'. But I suspect some of the Janes (it is usually women) would be quite able to write down what they thought if need be.

Sorry, I see that all of this is getting a long way away from the original question and I hope the OP isn't offended. Blush

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 13:49

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 24/01/2014 13:50

minne - I would be rather happier to see the dad bring a baby in, though I'd keep quiet about that! Grin If more men did it I think it'd be a damn sight easier to explain to certain people that actually, yes, there is a real issue here. Depressing, but true.

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Minnieisthedevilmouse · 24/01/2014 13:51

Also please, as I don't know, what are you classifying as mewborn ? And are there not policies in place for some sort of mat leave or supported study?

This can't be a new question surely....? Universities must see this and taken an approach....?

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 13:52

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 13:54

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Minnieisthedevilmouse · 24/01/2014 13:56

Thank you. I'd like an accommodation too but am wary of....unsure which word appropriate...favouritism?

That said I'm a bit surprised there's not a supported study option in first few weeks? The question being asked you itself makes me assume there's no approach already in place...,? That can't be right....? Schools have to.

I think as a one off fine. I am conscious of the additional students though who may not be keen every week. What of their (hate this word but another escapes me) rights?

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 14:00

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BertieBottsJustGotMarried · 24/01/2014 14:01

At the university I went to, lecture attendance was not mandatory (but in the smaller lectures if you had the same seminar tutor it would be noticed and commented on) but seminar attendance was compulsory and you had to attend 80% to pass the course, or have very good reason.

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kickassangel · 24/01/2014 14:02

When I was talking to college about doing an MA I said I could have childcare problems. The immediate response was that lecturers would be expected to accommodate that in some way, including letting dd sit at the back and read or play games.

I think universities are realizing that lack of childcare tends to exclude mothers and that they should keep them in board, particularly as it helps them to make money.

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PleaseJustLeaveYourBrotherAlon · 24/01/2014 14:07

I direct you to buffy's comment mini Grin

I'd be quite happy if it was a dad taking care of his newborn. But the op is about a mother (and I will be the mother in class myself). My point is that the majority of caring for newborns is for biological reasons at least (the majority of women do bf at first at least) usually done by women so to kick newborns out is to mostly kick out women.

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 24/01/2014 14:18

I honestly don't know what the policy is where I am for undergraduates and maternity leave. I suspect, unfortunately, that students would probably simply be encouraged to intermit for the year, though for some this would work fine.

For postgrads it is different, and you do get normal maternity leave.

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Minnieisthedevilmouse · 24/01/2014 14:40

Id guess I expected a kind of mat leave or supported study for six months with optional attendance to lectures/seminars/ outings. Is the only answer to defer a year? Thus separating you from all friends etc? Bizarre.

I'm a grad from myself. I assumed I guess that as schools do have answers in place for underage and up to 18 what is effectively a school for adults might have thought it through a bit. I'm a bit perplexed as this thread suggests there isn't much of anything in place.

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Minnieisthedevilmouse · 24/01/2014 14:40

I'm a grad myself. Not from myself. Blooming phone!

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/01/2014 14:50

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 24/01/2014 15:07

minnie - as I say, I really don't know.

I think, sadly, the difficulty isn't just explicit institutional rules but implicit pressures. Certainly when I was 18, it was simply presented to me as 'not an option' to have a baby and study. Not because it was actually against the university rules, but because no-one I spoke to had anything to say except 'this is a very bad idea'. And it makes me angry that I know someone who was told precisely the same earlier this year, so some things don't change.

In terms of rules, it will vary from university to university, but I would worry about the implicit pressure to defer and return.

But this thread is only people talking about their own knowledge, and some of us (me!) only know what we've seen at our own instititions. It could be very different at others.

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