The Myths About Women Who "Cry Rape"

[DontCallMePeanut]

From The Telegraph

Sorry, my head's not in the right place to provide any critique of this at the moment, but thought this would interest the members of the feminist section. Will attempt to comment when I have a clearer head.

Lenin, I hadn't read that stat before, but that's something positive to hear, re the prosecution/conviction ratio. Would be even sweeter to hear that every case resulted in a prosecution, and every incident got reported

/just read it... Reading through the Stern Review now... interesting reading...

What I'd like to understand is why, when there are so many negative consequences to making an allegation of rape (having your character and actions torn to bits in court as well as the social repercussions), would anyone make a false allegation?

I'm not passing judgement, or denying that it exists, of course not, but I would genuinely like to know what people think might be the psychological motive for "crying rape"?

Joaninha, that's what genuinely confuses me, too.

I know, right? Because I have been in so many situations where if I had been raped I would never have reported it because of the sheer mortification of having to go through it all in public, as well as the "well you shouldn't have gotten yourself into that situation" comments that I'd expect from the more old-fashioned contingent of my family!

Misshodgeinhay, do you have any argument to bring to the discussion, or did you just come on the feminist board purely in order to sneer at it? If one of the regular posters tells you to fuck off because it looks very much as though you have joined this thread purely to tell everyone that the feminist board is a load of shit without actually advancing an argument, will you then go and start a thread in another section whingeing about what a horrible load of meanies the feminists are?

Viz this demand for "independent evidence", what exactly is your definition of independent evidence, Moonferret and others who think like him? Do you mean that you want a rape to be witnessed by an independent witness? So no conviction should ever occur if the rape wasn't witnessed by a third party? Shariah-style? Or is independent evidence something different?

RE the "it's your fault for getting yourself in that situation." Yes, in principle we advise people to be careful. But realistically, even if you were walking home drunk, half naked, down a dark ally in the middle of the night after attending an orgy, they still have no right to force themselves upon you - it is still wrong and they should be convicted.

Herb, ignore MisHodge. That is the one an only post ever used under that name, and it was obviously set up to walk in and pick a fight with the fem board. I think it would an idea to report the post to HQ just in case it is you-know-who.

We advise people to be careful, and up until a few months ago, I'll admit I thought that was the sensible option.

OK, be careful. Fair enough. That's what you say to someone if they're doing something silly.

No woman goes out looking to get raped. So why is the advice "don't get raped"? Sorry, doesn't make sense.

I think there are other situations as well as rape where women get blamed for a crime against them. It's not just where it's her word against his, it happens when there's hard evidence. DV victims often get the comment 'why didn't you just leave him'. I read an article about a woman who's child had been abducted by the father and taken abroad and the comments underneath where 'well why did she marry him, why didn't she stop him, why didn't she use a contact centre'

Oh, and by the way MissHodge (if you're reading this) - I am a bloke and am quite welcome in here to join in discussions (and have never been attached for being male). But I don't make any rediculous and general accusations at the whole board that are obviously migonistic in nature. Get a grip.

I used to get drunk all the time years ago, I used to go clubbing with a group of friends, we'd all get disgracefully drunk and then I'd go and crash at the place of one of them, along with 2 other guys. So there was me and 3 blokes, all riotously drunk. On several occasions, 2 of them would drag/ carry me home. Not once did any of them rape me, because none of them were rapists. Being drunk did not lead to me being raped because I was not in the company of rapists.

Contrary to your very unthought-out post Misshodgeinmay, feminists don't believe all men are rapists. It's people who think that if women get drunk, they might get raped, who believe all men are rapists. Men don't turn into rapists when a woman gets drunk; only people who deep down believe all men are rapists, believe that.

LilBB, are there any crimes where a man gets blamed for being a victim, to the degree a woman does?

I had to defend a girl who bullied me relentlessly in high school, recently. She was called a shit mother, very publicly, for not leaving her ex the first time he hit her. This was a comment added after she'd told her friends that her ex had been denied contact, and she felt like it was a weight off her shoulder.

I don't think there are Peanut. I certainly can't think of any. Although there is the attitude of a man being weak or soft if he is victim to some crimes eg DV but I don't think they get the level of blame that female victims get.

HerBeX, agreed. The majority of my friends are male. I get ribbed about being a "man-hating feminist", but it's never something they've meant.

I've had one friend escort me home, blind drunk, explain to my mum I'd had a bit much, and phoned first thing in the morning to check I was ok. I spent my 20th birthday with three of the blokiest blokes I know, under the influence of god knows how many vodkas and a few spliffs. None of them tried anything. I've fallen asleep in my best friend's room, and he's just carried on with coursework/gaming/whatever... Now, to the rape apologist, surely I was putting myself at risk?

Well, no. No matter what position I was in, they were not and are not rapists. And they all acknowledge that in the event of rape, the responsibility is that of the rapist. Not the victim. We'd be living in a dark place if we were all scared of all men, y'know?

Aha, yes. the DV point.

Sociology last year, one of my classmates revealed that he had been the victim of abuse from his ex wife. Straight away, he was greeted with "what kind of man let's himself get beaten up by a woman?" from one of the males in the group. Our course had a higher than usual rate of previous victims of abuse. Out of 20 women, 12 had been victims of domestic violence. Needless to say, the twerp who made the "what kind of man..." comment got a mouthful from the rest of us, simultaneously.

Motives that the press likes to mention: revenge; woman scorned; etc. Note they are mentioned in cases that have still not gone to trial, like Julian Assange.

Out in the real world: women who have in all likelihood actually been raped but have been cowed into retracting their allegations through further threats and are then prosecuted.

Try research on rapists by Dr David Lisak. Observant readers will spot that he is a man. Thus his evidence will be credible. Sadly, he still thinks rapists are usually not convicted. Even though he is a man.

I agree. I've been blind mashed with various blokes and women with nothing happening. I think it's just that Rapists think it is OK to do when the woman is drunk, but that is a far cry from alchohol making men into rapists.

"I'm not passing judgement, or denying that it exists, of course not, but I would genuinely like to know what people think might be the psychological motive for "crying rape"?"

I was just talking about this. Possibly these reasons (for these extremely rare cases, as I believe them to be, please don't put any words in my mouth or call me a rape apologist, and refer to my previous comment that I believe 99% of rape claims are genuine, which is far fewer than the 'official' figure. Ok?)

1. For some financial reward. I would guess this is extremely uncommon, but I suppose if the DSK is a false claim (not saying it is) this is the reason?

1. Malice. Perhaps there was consensual sex, but the person regretted it, or came to hate the person, she might 'cry rape' to make his life miserable.

1. Pretending it wasn't consensual so you don't get in trouble. This is what I GUESS happens most often - someone cheats on a partner, or does it with someone they shouldn't,and rather than admit it was consensual, says they were raped. Then one thing leads to another and the person is arrested, etc. This is the case where I can sympathise a little, and also understand that after a while the accuser will drop the case and or admit it was consensual when their conscience wins out.

MarySue I can see that those reasons would be the ones people would think of when it comes to false claims, but as mentioned before the hugely invasive process of investigating a rape would put most people off. I would think (maybe naive) that most people would stop before they even got to the police station in those cases.