'Old Lady' Christmas Book

[PiratePenguin]

On the 1st December we all have a Christmas book. This year it's my turn to buy them. My mum is 84 and I have no idea what book to get her. She's not that in to mysteries so can anyone recommend a book that she'd like? She watches Call the Midwife and read lots of Catherine Cookson 'way back when'. Village / gentle style books is kind of her style. Any suggestions welcome - along with many thanks!

Your mum sounds adorable, and if she just wants a cosy winter read then why not? Would this be too ‘modern’ for her
wordery.com/a-wedding-in-december-sarah-morgan-9781848457935?cTrk=MTc4NjAwNTk5fDVmODE5YmIwOWViNTU6MToxOjVmODE5YmEzNDgxOGY1LjU1NTA0NjMxOjczMmM5MGZl

@PersephonePromotesEquanimity

No, Veterinari, my point was that one of the purposes of literature - as a thing in civilisation - is to broaden horizons and create/enable empathy between widely distant and un-alike human beings.

We can be fairly sure that many of the greatest atrocities we know of from history or current affairs might have been at least mitigated if the peoples involved had had the benefit of some intellectual / spiritual familiarity with "the other". The sort of familiarity gained through reading.

Literature - the ability to tell stories - is what separates us from other animals. It seems a waste to use it purely to look into a mirror.

I obviously have no actual feelings about the OP's mother's choices. This is an anonymous forum - I'm using an anonymous example to explore a wider point. This is what human beings do ...

Ah so you're derailing a thread where the OP has asked for specific book recommendations so that we can all enjoy the benefits of your personal insights and theories on the role of literature in society, whilst simultaneously judging the OP's mum and anyone else that doesn't share your beliefs. Thanks ever so much for that clear demonstration of how your wide reading has not resulted in any display of the empathy which you seem to be championing.

It's strange that your engagement in a broad range of literature has still resulted in judgemental and sanctimonious postings, and a rather arrogant belief that you have a right to derail any thread for your own purposes under the pretext of 'discussion'.

I think you're disproving your own point, which is a shame because I wholeheartedly agree with your premise, but absolutely not with the manner in which you've presented it.

No, stating my opinion once is not derailing a thread. Feeling obliged to explain my opinion is tedious but, y'know - discussion. Being called all sorts of names just because I chose to make a broader point - well, that just suggests to me that the level of intelligence here is slipping!

Absolutely Pilcher, my first thought.

Has she ever read any DE Stevenson? Those are the cosiest books I have ever read, and you can get them second hand at least. I've liked all of them, some are set on Scotland, some in the south. The Tall Stranger was the first one that I read.

For your teenage girl - The two that teenage girls at work are telling me they love at the moment are:
Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi and ‘One of us is Lying’ by Karen McManus. However, not Christmas themed. Personally I love The Dark is Rising, but it is an old book now and possibly reads as slightly dated.

It's a thread about reading.

But I'm not supposed to talk about reading?

I'd agree that the Persephone books list is lovely - but they're not all gentle!

No but what I have found is that the phrase 'the story gradually unfolds' describes many of the Persephone books I have read.
Rather than the modern way with some best sellers where you are hit by the first few pages in order to hold your attention, and murder or psychotic abusers are the order of the day.
I think with Covid influencing life so much at the moment I want to relax with a more gently told tale.

Ah so you're derailing a thread where the OP has asked for specific book recommendations so that we can all enjoy the benefits of your personal insights and theories on the role of literature in society, whilst simultaneously judging the OP's mum and anyone else that doesn't share your beliefs. Thanks ever so much for that clear demonstration of how your wide reading has not resulted in any display of the empathy which you seem to be championing.

It's strange that your engagement in a broad range of literature has still resulted in judgemental and sanctimonious postings, and a rather arrogant belief that you have a right to derail any thread for your own purposes under the pretext of 'discussion'.

I think you're disproving your own point, which is a shame because I wholeheartedly agree with your premise, but absolutely not with the manner in which you've presented it.

Thank you for summarising and putting into words exactly how I felt about some responses on this thread.

The OP set out a straightforward request for gentle book recommendations for her mother. She wasn’t looking for academic discourse or a critique of her elderly mother’s tastes or “world view”. This thread became nasty and there was no reason for it to.
It’s very discouraging to see that there is seemingly now no area of MN which is free from a nasty minority trying to turn every thread into an argument or criticism of an OP or their loved ones. Most people are not here for an argument or to be “schooled”. They just want a simple response.

There’s such a simple solution as well...if you can’t or won’t answer the question or your response is more about your own importance then just don’t respond.

a rather arrogant belief that you have a right to derail any thread for your own purposes under the pretext of 'discussion'.

Persephone is perfectly entitled to express an opinion that people may benefit from broadening their reading horizons beyond a particular, quite narrow type of book - that's not a derail. It's for the OP to decide whether to take the suggestion up.

It's far more 'arrogant' to try to police threads in this way, than it is to try to open up a wider and potentially interesting discussion following on from the premise of the OP.

That's digression, not derailment - completely normal in forum discussions about non life-or-death matters, such as book recommendations.

You don’t think you sound a little pompous, Persephone
Giving your potted philosophy on the purpose of literature on a lighthearted thread about gifts for an 84 year old?
Years ago, my husband dismissed my reading of Great Literature in translation, rather than the original. I told him he was being a pompous arse and he had the grace to apologise and accept that I had a different, equally valid approach to reading.
You have no idea about the life experiences of this woman, or why she enjoys cozy, comfort reading.

You don’t think you sound a little pompous, Persephone

But is your belief that I sound pompous sufficient reason to indicate that I should not be allowed to post about reading on a thread about reading?

How many people, exactly, must I be certain will approve of my views before I express them here? MN is a discussion forum, not a popularity contest.

My mother has led the most magnificent life and is incredibly well read, cultured and rather remarkable. Highly educated and intelligent, at the age of 84, she knows what she enjoys. In the same way I have tried many food from numerous cultures, when I order a takeaway I always go for the same thing as I like it and know I'm going to like it rather than trying something else and being disappointed - even if this means I may miss out on something amazing. As a widow in a small village, living a fairly quiet life thanks to covid, it is important for me to get her a book she'll enjoy as escapism rather than trying to push her boundaries or prompt her to have an internal debate.
Thanks so much for all the wonderful recommendations - I've ordered two for her and one for my daughter. Thank you to those who saw this thread as what it was - advice on a specific issue. I don't often post on here and when I do, it's always to ask advice from others who have more knowledge in certain areas than me and on every occasion the collective hive mind of mumsnet has been really useful. This was never meant to be a discussion about the reading habits of a rather wonderful old lady who I adore.

OP, she really does sound lovely and I’m sorry that the thread got derailed when all you wanted were some recommendations. I hope that your mother enjoys her new reads and that they give her the comfort and escape that a lot of us are craving right now. And thank you for starting the thread, I want to check some of these recommended books out too.

I too am glad you got some recommendations. I found Winter Solstice a few years ago from a similar thread about books to read at Xmas. Which for me is a time I like to read cosy escapism easy to read books. As well as more erudite offerings!

My mother has led the most magnificent life and is incredibly well read, cultured and rather remarkable. Highly educated and intelligent,

My mother is the same - only a little older!

Just remembered another one, Jean Stubbs - not 'chick lit' as such but very readable and she doesn't seem to be particularly well known for some reason. Would particularly recommend 'Kelly Park' as a Christmassy read, but 'Charade' and 'Like We Used To Be' are another couple of favourites

Sorry, and another - Fannie Flagg's 'A Redbird Christmas'. Her books are marvellous, gently humourous and about nice people and she gives her characters such wonderful 'voices' - I particularly like 'Welcome to the World, Baby Girl', 'Standing in the Rainbow', and 'Daisy Fay and The Miracle Man' although she's best known for 'Fried Green Tomatoes'.

@PiratePenguin your lovely mum sounds similar to mine, who I sadly lost last year. My dad is now alone like your mum and doesn’t read at all any more except the newspaper. He’s an avid fan of documentaries though, especially wildlife / nature / animals etc. It’s very hard for them being on their own and having such limited contact with the outside world. Thank goodness your mum has you and the rest of her family.

@Pelleas

a rather arrogant belief that you have a right to derail any thread for your own purposes under the pretext of 'discussion'.

Persephone is perfectly entitled to express an opinion that people may benefit from broadening their reading horizons beyond a particular, quite narrow type of book - that's not a derail. It's for the OP to decide whether to take the suggestion up.

It's far more 'arrogant' to try to police threads in this way, than it is to try to open up a wider and potentially interesting discussion following on from the premise of the OP.

That's digression, not derailment - completely normal in forum discussions about non life-or-death matters, such as book recommendations.

Then by the same rationale, I am also perfectly within my rights to state my opinion and yet you've accused me of 'arrogantly' 'policing the thread' by doing so. You can't have it both ways.

Also please do clarify exactly which books Persephone 'suggested' during her critique of the OP's mother? Ah that's right none, so her post was not a 'digression' of an answer to the OP's question but an unsolicited critique of OP's mother's character by a stranger based on Persephone's own assumptions and prejudices.

It's not policing the thread to suggest that someone lecturing us all on their view of the role of literature in society and making unpleasant judgements about the OP's mother is unnecessary, rude and irrelevant to the OP's question. You are of course free to continue ignoring the OP and to disagree. But you're clearly in the minority, and you'd probably be better off starting your own thread rather than trying to start arguments on this one.

You don't have to justify yourself @PiratePenguin - buy your mum whatever she likes and ignore random posters who think your thread should be all about them! I'm similar in that I've read widely and travelled extensively but I still enjoy sitting down with a comforting murder from the queen of crime

There are loads of great suggestions on this thread now. I hope your mum enjoys her books!

High Rising by Angela Thirkell would be a lovely book for your Mother. Set at Christmas in a village at the beginning of the last century.

Just to say that I’ve really enjoyed the recommendations on this thread, despite Persephone’s attempt to completely derail this thread into a first year undergrad’s discussion of What Is Literature Anyway? under the disingenuous disguise of “What? It’s a thread about reading isn’t it? Why are you all annoyed that i called the OP’s mother’s personal taste ‘a waste of one’s reading life’?”

I have added several i’d never heard of to my wish list and will work my way through them between now and Christmas. Thank you!

We can be fairly sure that many of the greatest atrocities we know of from history or current affairs might have been at least mitigated if the peoples involved had had the benefit of some intellectual / spiritual familiarity with "the other". The sort of familiarity gained through reading.

She's 84! She's not about to go off and bomb Pearl Harbour because OP bought her some James Herriot.

She's 84! She's not about to go off and bomb Pearl Harbour because OP bought her some James Herriot.

@PersephonePromotesEquanimity

It's a thread about reading.

But I'm not supposed to talk about reading?

It's a thread about a very specific genre, specifically asking for suggestions for someone else who enjoys that genre. That is why your responses are not being hailed as particularly constructive (or kind).