9 month old should apparently eat what I eat - but my diet is awful

[Randomname8612]

Hi, name changed for this.

My 9 month old loves his food, once I started weaning him at 6 months he was always very keen to eat most solids and loves to eat.

I hate to cook and have been using baby food jars and pouches most of the time, combined with some home made foods that dad has made (when he has the time).
Breakfast is usually weetabix, porridge or toast, easy to make.

Thing is, now he's getting older everywhere I read seems to say he should be eating "what I eat" instead of keep resorting to jars, pouches etc. However, my diet is awful. I've had a bad relationship with food for many years, I hate cooking and preparing food, I mostly eat junk that isn't nutritional, or convenience foods that I can just blast in the microwave. My job doesn't help this, I am used to working long shifts and bringing lunches and meals that I can microwave in a short amount time, or snacking on high calorie rubbish that gives me enough energy for work. My lunch is usually just a packet of crisps.

I am trying to work through this issue, but I'm struggling.

I'll continue to try, however...... My main concern is that I'm letting my child down.
I hate cooking so much and I don't know how to cook many things due to never having any interest in it.... and can't even bring myself to cook things for him. I can't "put things aside for him" like many websites suggest because my own meal is just absolute junk. I'm ashamed of this.

I haven't enjoyed the weaning process at all, it was so much easier when he only needed milk.

Because of covid, DH shifts have changed and he is working very late hours and can't make dinners like usual. So I somehow have to step up. But I don't even know where to start.

Just wondering if anyone else out there is similar to me and what solutions they have found to help?

Please try not to judge or mock. I am trying to change.

I don't think going from eating crisps to making fully pre preprepared slow cooked food is realistic. Start slow

Breakfast - weetabix, porridge etc is fine. Add some berries or slices banana on the side and he's had a portion of fruit already

lunch - just do an easy 'picky' plate. Cream cheese sandwich, selection of some raw veg and fruit cut up ie cucumber and kiwi one day, cherry tomatoes in half and some apple another. Yogurt afterwards

Dinner - scrambled egg, half avocado, pre made falafels, houmous, all easy to assemble or made. Mix up with simple pasta in sauce type dishes (learn to make simple veggie tomato sauce).
Things like baked fish, rice and veg are easy to start with.

I think @MrsTerryPratchett’s unbreakable rule is great (Also where frozen peas come in)

As far as pre-prepped veg goes if you’re ever tempted by butternut squash buy frozen peeled & cut to begin with. Those are tough bastards.

Similarly for turnip (swede) look up the singing turnip microwave method (I always find they need a little longer & you need to punch them a couple of times ) but so much easier than the peeling & cutting of the world’s toughest vegetable. Why the supermarkets feel the need to shrink wrap them is beyond me!

There are a couple of apps and a supportive face book group called “baby led weaning cookbook”. The basic version of the app is less than £4- hundreds of recipes. Join the Facebook group- there are loads of questions and advice about how to do the recipes. Just have a browse and pick something- is there a home made version of something you like as microwave meal? Then have a little go.
You are so right to recognise how important it is for your son. Giving it a go is a great gift to him.
Lidl have small packs of child friendly fruit/ veg- as pp said aim to offer at least one with every meal.
Little changes will build up!

I have had similar problems. I have disordered eating, and I find cooking balanced meals and snacks for DD 5 a huge struggle and always have done. It's not ideal, but I make sure meals are planned and cooked fresh(ish) starting at a set time always with vegetables. Frozen are ideal.

Typical meals include,
Poached salmon, boiled potatoes, peas.
Grilled chicken, mash potato, mixed veg.
Spag B. Jamie Oliver (!) Does a really easy one and you don't need bacon and can use fresh herbs.
You can give sausages and one thing with oven chips once a week.
Jacket potato and salad. LO will love munching salad.
Cottage Pie - super easy.
Pasta with cheese sauce. Easy to do from scratch.

Lunches, small sandwich or eggs. Super quick in any form. Eggs, I can sometimes manage so good too.

If you don't think you fancy the piece of fish, cut it in portions on day of purchase and freeze. Same with any other meat.

Sorry, I didn't mean, "you can give." I meant to edit to, I feel I can give,

Buy a slow cooker. Buy a couple of chicken breast and pre prepared fresh veg. Throw into pot with as tock cube and pint of boiled water. Add tin of chopped tomatoes. Dinners for your son every day. Just freeze portions.

Throw a few fish fingers in the oven with oven chips and frozen peas in boiling water.

Pasta in boiling water and jar of bolignese sauce poured over. Whack in microwave.

Don't worry if you can only do 4 simple basic meals. It is better than nothing and has nutrients for your son.

Your love of your son will help you learn to cook basics. Also son might like a slice of pizza.

There’s ways of making really low-effort meals that are a step up from microwave ready meals but not much more difficult. I’d suggest starting with these rather than going full on into recipes. Then build up when you’ve gained a bit of confidence.

So for instance you can get individual portions of frozen mixed veg that you can microwave in a couple of minutes. Usually things like peas, sweetcorn, tiny broccoli pieces and carrots. They’re expensive but it’s so easy to cook them to go with something really easy like fish fingers and potato waffles cooked together in the oven, or just alongside whatever you would normally eat.

Microwaved jacket potatoes with cheese and beans or mix a tin of tuna with a tin of sweetcorn and a couple of dollops of mayo.

Boil pasta, drain then add a jar of sauce and grated cheese.

If cooking meat is a bit of a big leap you can buy tinned cooked chicken, or cooked pieces of chicken from the deli section, then mix with a jar of curry sauce and heat up until bubbling for a few minutes and hot through. Use a microwave packet of rice and toast a naan in the toaster and you have a curry!

It really can be super easy and while you’ll need to keep an eye on the salt content you really don’t need to worry about making anything from scratch.

Lots of great ideas on here I will try! Thank you

Audible for me! I lose hours now in the kitchen. Quite happily!

Sounds good, whatever helps really in terms of assuaging the boredom.

I love having absolute 80's on, in the week it's bush & ritchie at tea time which I really enjoy their banter

MrsTerryPratchett I apply that to myself! Mh issues and disability mean I'm not always up to "proper" cooking especially as standing for even short periods can be very painful if I'm having a bad day, so I always buy cherry tomatoes, peppers, mushrooms and cucumber as I enjoy them raw quite happily and the tomatoes and mushrooms I don't even need to chop!

Also always get apples and bananas as they've a good shelf life for fruit and again quick and easy to just grab and eat.

Dried fruits are ok too, yes they're high in sugar but once or twice a week is fine plus high in fibre and iron

fully pre preprepared slow cooked food it's entirely possible to cook very easily in the slow cooker, just ready diced protein (meat for some quorn or soya for me) and ready prepped veg (fresh or frozen both work fine) op need only add a low sodium stock and some herbs, pop it on to cook and at the end of the day could serve with bread for carbs dead easy

if you’re ever tempted by butternut squash buy frozen peeled & cut to begin with. Those are tough bastards not really applicable to op but for you @Coldhandscoldheart if I'm using a fresh one (usually for soup but also as a side, alternative to mashed potato) simply cut in half, scoop out seeds, drizzle with oil and roast, its then dead easy to scoop out the flesh.

@caringcarer and @Brandaris jarred and ready made sauces and processed food is not recommended for such young babies as ops as they're too high in salt that's potentially dangerous for their kidneys

Eg Tomato based pasta sauce is super easy to make using Tinned chopped unflavoured tomatoes, plain herbs and fresh garlic & maybe onions.

Go back to basics. Just aim to get some carbs, veg, and protein in each meal.
Pasta and pesto or tomato sauce with any frozen veg thrown in (just shove it in with the pasta as it’s cooking) and tinned tuna/cooked chicken/ham/chopped sausage is super easy.
Jacket potato with beans and cheese always goes down well. (And you can just microwave the potato!)
Rice (microwave is quick and easy) with salad and chicken.
Roast some veg (Sweet potato, peppers, butternut squash, carrots etc. - Just throw in the oven with some olive oil) and keep it in a Tupperware in the fridge for a few days. You can dish it out with whatever bits and bobs you have to hand.
Babies love hummus which is a good source of fat and protein. Just serve with some chopped veg and toast.

Don’t be afraid of using the baby ready meals for 1+ or whatever. The age recommendations are based on traditional weaning but they are safe for younger babies under supervision.

@Graphista a good point about the squash, my problem is I’m absolutely rubbish at roasting things, don’t know why. I should probably practice that.
When I saw I’d been mentioned in a post, I’d assumed it was going to be about punching the turnip.

A lot of the suggestions here aren’t ideal for a 9m old though.

Jar sauces, baked beans etc.

@InTheWings totally agree - I'd include ham and Tinned fish in that, pesto is VERY salty if shop bought

Don’t beat yourself up you can change things. Iv always cooked for my two but get stuck in a rut with meals they like and can have. Iv just bought what mummy makes cookbook she is also on Instagram. It is great food every one can enjoy and so simple. There are things like toasties but with veg in so easy but healthy. Some of the recipe combine I would never think to try but have been enjoying them all. I have an Annabel Karmel book but I hardly use it I find her recipes a bit faffy and they aren’t always aimed at the whole family.

I sort of have this issue too. I used to love cooking and would look forward to it all day and pick out my ingredients and make a meal plan for the evening with enough left for lunch. However I went travelling and found the convenience and variety of eating out in much cheaper countries and tasting so many lovely flavours and then ended up living in a womens shelter in the usa where all the food was cooked for us and at a high quality too. Needless to say I'm now spoiled and having to relearn some love for cooking all over again (plus the washing up) with a breastfeeding baby and having to do simple easy food that doesnt take long which doesnt excite me. Sorry if I sound conceited I'm just explaining how it feels in my head! I'm fighting hard against it but do end up getting take away a lot (which costs a lot more here) and eating frozen rubbish and just trying to remember to make regular food for weaning baby. Have to be honest and say I'm relying on the breastmilk heavily until I can really learn to love being in a routine and doing everything myself again. She does eat food all day but it's mostly fruit porridge and pieces of vegetables. It's only when you've done differently that you realise how much work it really is! Struggling with shifting the mindset a lot but reading through a lot of these ideas is helping.