10 mo son has now dropped off weight charts - any advice for staying sane?

[Firepile]

My 10 mo son has been low on the weight charts -

My only advice to you is keep doing what feels right. My dd never hits those stupid charts, she was prem. and she slowly slowly gained weight. She eats fine now (aged 7) but probably wouldnt get on the charts even now.

Stop stressing, your child is not ill/starving etc ignore the lot of them.

Personally I wouldn't even bother going to appointments however that is your choice

I wouldn't just stop going to appointments if you've got a paed involved in case they get concerned. But I would be firm and explain your reasons for your decisions yet make it clear you are happy to listen to the docs. High fat food doesn't have to be bad - unless there are nut allergies among first degree relatives peanut butter on toast is a good one. Children need more fat than adults so don't worry about feeding him fatty food as such (agree with you about trans fats - could you try making your own cakes and biscuits?).

My DS is 10 months old. He started on the 50th percentile for weight and settled on to the 25th for a few weeks before dropping to 0.4th percentile after developing a food (milk) aversion because he had silent reflux. It was a nightmare - He was fed expressed breast milk until he was 4.5 months old (never latched on properly - feeding him has been difficult from day one really!) and then went on to a high energy infant formula called infatrini. When his failure to thrive first started the HV said maybe my milk wasn't fatty enough because I was expressing. This really upset me because I was sensitive about having to express (I was desperate to breast feed successfully) anyway and felt like it was my fault he was skinny. The dietician didn't agree with the HV so that made me feel a bit better and the first consultant we saw said to continue giving ebm as that was nearly always 1st choice. We did fortify it though to make it nearly as calorific as the high energy formula.

Weaning has not been fun. He gags on food really easily. His consultant said he may not take lumps until he is a year old. I recently discovered that he is happier with lumps if he is feeding him self finger food rather than having lumps in a puree. So we are making a little progress. It is strange really - he is happy to eat chunks out of a dry weetabix but will gag and sometimes throw up if I mix it to a sloppy mush with milk!

DS is now between the 9th and the 25th percentile and is no longer on reflux medication - He will probably be on the high calorie formula for a while longer.

I (try) and stay sane by reminding my self that this is temporary and he will eat normally one day! I'm sure I will look back and laugh about this stage with him when he is a teenager eating us out of house and home!

I forgot to say that I'm surprised they haven't ordered a full blood work up.

Also you can ask your HV for a bf baby weight chart. I plotted my DS weight on this when he was still on ebm - didn't make a difference though as he was still on the same percentile!

hi elibummum, just wanted to say 'i hear you' on the being desp to bf thing. and your clever son is right about the finger food, by the way. look
here (it's my blog) if you're after more finger food ideas.

Hmmm. No blood tests ordered - but that's because they seem to be pretty convinced that it is my fault... And I suspect that he would not be looking better on the bf only charts - reckon he would be off the bottom of those too, although not so much.

On the other hand, my statistic of choice is that babies born to short parents are 8 times more likely to be diagnosed failing to thrive. Hmmm. Can't help noticing that dp and I are at least 3 inches smaller than average.

Next hospital appointment is on Monday. I can feel my anxiety levels creeping up already. Trying to be optimistic about the fact that ds's 3-6 month trousers are starting to look a bit tight round the waist.

But do visit Aitch's blog. As I have already said, it's an oasis of sanity in the crazy world of getting your child to eat stuff. And bits of it are funny, too.

My Sister was tiny at 5 years old. In age 2-3 year clothes for school. Our GP took one look and said 'for God sake, you're all under 5 ft 1 inch. you are't average!!

FYI - they took a scan of my second baby and told me she was dead- -until they realised I was small and had small babies!!

Firepile, have you considered breast compression or similar? So that your DD might feed a tiny bit more? I know it's normally recommended for tiny babies, but it might help a little bit ...

I'd go looking for a good BFC and see if they have any tips for you, to see if you can increase how many calories she gets from your milk.

Also, yes, she's only 10 months, but you can give cow's milk a bit before a year, so you might try offering that and see if it goes down better than formula. You can also get other higher fat milks - my DS1 quite like buffalo as an occasional treat ... runs about 10% fat iirc.

Duh, your son, not your daughter.

Just to make a point (about my sister - didn't fill it all in!)

The HV at my sisters school made an appointment against my Mum's wishes to see a paediatrician about her height and weight. They wanted to put her on steroids for growth!!!! Stick to your guns!! Little people have little babies. STOP taking her to the health visitor!!!!! Mum went to see family GP, and he laughed at steroids, wrote a letter to hospital and that was last they heard of it!!

My children are both smaller and lighter than average. I stopped using hv's when my DS1 turned 1 year. Everything is about being average and on the right 'scale.' FGS, how many 'average' people are there out there?

If your baby eats, doesn't scream because he is hungry, then there is nothing wrong with him!!!!!

Sod the centiles!!!!!

Hi there, sorry I haven't read the entire thread so ignore me if it has all been said before. My ds is now 2yrs 3mths and is on the 25th percentile for weight and height. He was a big baby but lost gound when introducing solid food (from about 6 months to 18 months) dropped off the charts. He was born with a medical condition but paeds are unsure the correlation of this with his intake of food. We did not get him fully established onto food until after 13/14 months. I breastfed until 16months and with regards to food did the high cal thing through avocado, added oils etc (dairy free un til 2 years and gluten free for several months in this time. Mainly I tried really hard just not to stress. I offered loads of little meals a day, I let him play and explore his food for months and months and i took away uneaten food with very little comment but heaps of praise for any attempts at eating, tasting etc. Now at 2 he is still small but he is a fantastic eater on the whole, will try most things and can eat vast quantities at times and none at others. Any way hope that this helps that there are children who have come through the other end of what you are going through.

Firepile - I really feel for you. They have a way of making you feel so guilty don't they?

My dd started off on the 50th percentile for height and weight. She is now 16 months old, and while her height is still 50th percentile, her weight has long been far under the charts. She is skinny. She has just had a tummy bug, and now I can count her ribs. I hate bathing her because her arms and legs are so thin. When I took her to the GP last week she took one look at her and said: 'yes it's a worry when these underweight babies get ill'.

She is still breastfed, because I can guarentee that when she refuses all other food, she will still breastfeed. She wasn't fully weaned onto solids until the age of 11 months, then only because I discovered BLW. She consistently refused pureed food for the months previously. I also try and give her high calorie food but obviously want her to eat healthily as well.

BUT: She is developmentally faster then average. She is lively. She is happy. She is reasonbably healthy. She doesn't know she's underweight. All the babies in mine and my husband's family are on the skinny side, and everyone is healthy.

But sometimes I still can't help but be concerned.

Just to add to the voices here. My ds is 19.5 months and off the charts for height and hovers on and off 3rd centile for weight. He was small at birth (6 lb 2) and reached 50th centile briefly before dropping off. Our paeds (no special reason, it's normal to have a paed in Germany) are not entirely, but fairly relaxed about it - partly because we try and turn up to appointments together because looking at us pretty much explains it - I am 5'1" and dh is 5'2" . When ds was the age of yours, we had similar difficulties - he wasn't eating all that many solids - but in the few weeks before his first birthday it just all slotted into place. We did more or less BLW, and I was a bit cautious about introducing things because of allergies in the family. Now he eats fairly well - sometimes extremely well - and is still bf too (we have our own story of pressure to top up in his first couple of months ), is happy, active, learning, his language is positively exploding at the moment - and he's only been properly ill once in his life, and even that lasted no more than 2 days. But he's just not going to be a big child. Although our experience is quite positive, the culture is just so geared towards big babies somehow that those moments of doubt and concern are inevitable, aren't they? Anyway, you sound so sorted and thoughtful about the whole issue that I'm sure you're doing absolutely fine.

foundin - I'm five one too. I take no notice whatsoever. If you're small, your child is not going to be 'average', whatever 'average' is nowadays!!

I don't take DS2 to hv or paeds. I know she eats like a horse, but is just little!!!

aren't these weight charts out of date? didnt i read somewhere? just skimmed through answers and breastfed babies are i think generally smaller, and therefore not on the usual centile?

bandstand: I suggested to my dd's clinic that maybe her weight should be plotted on one of the new WHO graph's based on bf babies, which I just happened to have in my hand. I was told in no uncertain terms that they only use the standard graphs that the whole of Belgium uses (we live in Belgium). They refused to even glance at the new graphs.

oh how annoying, did you plot her on the new chart yourself?

yes I did, and she is just about on it. But what is more interesting is that apart from a blip at the start, her curve follows a nice curve that is typical for a breastfed baby.

Can still see her ribs though.