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Weaning

Find weaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Weaning forum. Use our child development calendar for more information.

Original poster

I hate weaning!

27 replies

LaDiDaDi · 11/11/2006 12:00

Dd is 27 weeks now and I started weaning 2 weeks ago and I just hate it! I'm trying to do blw but giving her some purees to use as dips with breadsticks or rice cakes as will as sticks of fruit and veg. I find it soooo time consuming as I have to predict when she will be hungry and start to offer he food about half an hour before she would normally want feeding otherwise she isn't interested. The mess is un-bloody-believable and I reckon that she actually swallows about a hundredth of what she's offered.

How much longer of this weaning hell!

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 11/11/2006 12:02

Stop doing so much work! Just give her what you're eating - if you're eating something she wants, she can have some?

I did the full puree hassle with DS1, weaned at 16 weeks (), and did very lazy BLW with DS2. I don't think any solids actually went in until he was 7 months, but it was so much less work.

Blackalice · 11/11/2006 13:14

I felt like this at first but it does get easier. Alfie eats more or less what we have and eats much more of it too. If you look back a month or so I did a very similar post to yours! Just keep going and you'll come out the other end - promise

terramum · 11/11/2006 13:25

I agree with NQC - you sound like you are doing an awful lot. Finger foods on their own are fine. Why make more work yourself by doing purees as well . Also theres no need to guess when she is hungry - thats what milk is for. Solids are only for tasters at this stage & will not fill her up at all. Just offer them when you eat your meals - that way you are cooking a lot less! It does get a bit tedious for you having the same veg at first, but after a few weeks theyve built up a nice range of different types to offer you some variety!

When we started solids with DS I kept on feeding him bm on demand and then offered him bits of our meals when he was awake, which at first was only once a day as he slept thru lunch & wasnt at all interested at breakfast as he was still very full from his morning feed! He only ate a few pieces at first - & thats perfectly normal. Its much easier & less stressful I think to think of first solids as toys than food - if they eat any of it thats a bonus on top of their milk and if they dont at least theyve explored it, by holding it & maybe chewed a bit!

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 11/11/2006 13:58

Hmm. I think perhaps part of the problem is that dp and I eat quite haphazardly, missing meals or eating quite late etc. I also have a tendency to eat rubbish eg lunch for me today was a chocolate crunchie cake, some strawberries and a breadstick pinched from dd. I'm trying to give her better habits! I also feel a bit of pressure from family to get more food into her. I'm resisting this as I know only too well that milk is the most important source of nutrition for her but repeating this mantra at mil and dm is wearing me down!

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 11/11/2006 14:11

Ah, well, it sounds like your DD is going to have to be a good influence on you. Seriously, before I weaned DS1, I lived on crap, too.

NotQuiteCockney · 11/11/2006 14:12

Oh, and please ignore the hassling to get more food into her! She's still tiny, it really is all about tastes at this point.

AitchTwoOh · 11/11/2006 14:21

my dd at nearly 11 months still can't really get the hang of dips and things that have been dipped. i think she likes to be the one to mix things up, iykwim so she's a bit confused when she sees them. plus if you've only been doing it for a week it sounds like you've possibly been a bit over-ambitious... dd was only on steamed carrot and bits of bread at that stage as i recall.

if you go to my blog here and look for the bit about allergies you will see an essay written by a canadian friend of mine. right at the bottom she confesses that she hates cooking and explains how she pre-prepares all the veggies so that all she has to do is bring them out and stick them in some boiling water. i'm quite a fan of frozen brussels sprouts and broccoli myself, just splash them with water, cover and microwave. and peas are a godsend once the pincer grip appears.

good luck, i'm quite a haphazard eater myself (haven't had breakfast or lunch yet...) but so long as dd gets a good breakfast in her and isn't short of milk i'm never really that bothered about her having the full three meals a day. often she'll have breakfast and dinner (not too late) and just graze for the rest. when you think of all the countries in the world where you'd be lucky to get one meal per day it makes a nonsense of this western 3 meals business.

AitchTwoOh · 11/11/2006 14:24

oh, and to return to the OP, if she's not interested then she maybe just isn't interested. which is fine, really, she's very young. you could just sit and eat with her on your lap and see if she makes a grab for anything, that's how we got started.

MrsDoolittle · 11/11/2006 14:49

I'm with NotQuiteCockney.
I found that first time I was uber conscientious but second I time I had far less time to mess around with.
Let her eat what you are eating. She will eat when she is hungry. If you need to puree what you eat - I have one of those Braun whizzy things, cheap from Asda.

MrsDoolittle · 11/11/2006 14:51

And I know the family pressure thing. Work really hard on closing your ears to this one, I had to.
You know you are right

terramum · 11/11/2006 15:40

Another one who lived off rubbish - we didnt even own a cooker before DS was born . We only ate microwave meals & takeaways before he started solids & after doing all my research on what I should offer & when etc.. I realised that there was literally nothing that DS could eat out of our meals. As I am incredibly lazy & just started cooking properly - only one meal to cook instead of mine & his . We eat much better as a result!

I found saying "not your baby - our baby" worked a lot better than trying to justify why were doing blw with "helpful" remarks from friends & relatives...things like "Ive never seen a baby weaned that way before"... or "my baby refused anything with lumps in it until he was 9 months" etc etc

fluffyanimal · 12/11/2006 14:50

This will probably sound really controversial and I'll probably get jumped on like a ton of bricks but...

if you can't stand the mess of blw and don't feel like she is actually eating anything, you could just spoonfeed some very basic purees or even use a jar if you are finding the cooking a hassle! I found that very easy as a start, combined with picking a particular time and always giving food at that time. Now weaning is well established, i am experimenting more with fingerfoods and letting ds eat more of what we eat.

AitchTwoOh · 12/11/2006 18:02

i don't think it's even slightly controversial, so i wouldn't worry about getting jumped on . i don't think blw is for everyone, it depends on the personalities involved, surely?

if you are doing blw then the one thing you shouldn't do is stress about the amounts as it's only for the experience, really. if you can't stop yourself from stressing the amounts beacause that's just the type of person you are, then i'd say spoonfeeding purees is definitely a more efficient way of getting food into them.

and the point is for both parent and child to be relaxed around food, so if you are freaking out about blw then it might be counter-productive to pursue it and pass that freakout onto the child.

as i recall we didn't have much mess to begin with, though, ladidadi, just because a stick of carrot doesn't make that much. but mixing purees and self-feeding does sound messy, that's for sure...

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 12/11/2006 19:08

I have tried to spoon feed her a little mashed sweet potato or puree but it wasn't much better than blw as she just grabbed the spoon herself and tried to suck it off then spat it out.

OP posts:
littlepiggie · 12/11/2006 19:51

Before staring weaning i would have breakfast, then nothing untill tea time other than junk, but now that i have to give ds something even if he just plays, (hummas up the kitchen cubards today) i eat lunch and dont pick just cos i need to eat somthing.
Maybe your dd just does not know what to do with it, i sat on the sofa with ds while i was eating a banana, i had decided that if he tried to have i go then i would let him, and he did.
That was 5 weeks ago (he was 24 weeks) and has only realy got to grips with it in the last 2 weeks.
I do offer food 3 times a day, but he is like a bottomless pit now.

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 12/11/2006 23:53

Thanks little piggie. I actually started a week earlier than I had intended because dd made a grab for my banana one day when I was eating it whilst holding her on my lap. I was distracted by something on the internet...oh, what could it be..?

I'm going to try to keep going but be a little more relaxed. I think that I will try to spread some puree on fingers of toast as she does like sucking at bits of toast.

OP posts:
fluffyanimal · 13/11/2006 08:42

I got round the spoon-grabbing thing by giving ds his own spoon to play with. That way his hands are busy, he's experimenting with putting a spoon in his mouth, but I still have control of the messy bit! Either that or a bickiepeg.

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 13/11/2006 09:45

Sorry to be a pest but when do you think I should start to offer water in a sippy cup?

OP posts:
AitchTwoOh · 13/11/2006 12:06

next time you feed him. just put it out for him and see what happens. if it's an avent magic one then not much ime, as the bloody things are too difficult to drink from. the freeflow tommee tippee ones are good. we use a spoon for yoghurt, by the way, and dd does need two spoons, one for me to load up and the other for her to grab.

littlepiggie · 13/11/2006 21:17

hows it gone today? do you still hate weaning.

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 14/11/2006 09:39

I'm still not keen on it!

Breakfast yesterday was toast spread with plum baby foods blueberry and banana puree and then cut into fingers.

She missed lunch as she was just suddenly very hungry and screaming for her milk, a bit of roasted courgette didn't pacify her at all!

Tea was roasted vegetable fingers which was unfortunately witnessed by a pair of nervous grandparents going "She's got that whole bit of courgette/carrot/pepper in her mouth, she's going to choke!" in alarming tones. I then gave her some couscous made up with chopped tomato to play with.
This wasn't too bad on the mess front.

Breakfast this morning has been the same as yesterday.

OP posts:
AitchTwoOh · 14/11/2006 12:37

er, my dd doesn't much like toast, are you sure yours does? and she certainly doesn't like it spread with anything other than butter. have you thought about giving her something else for breakfast? a banana? (cheaper than plum babyfoods purees...)
actually, she's not that fussed for courgette either, and nor am i if it's a bitter one.
couscous and roast veg sounds admirable, i think maybe we'll have that tonight now you've reminded me. aren't grandparents hilarious/annoying when it comes to weaning?

AitchTwoOh · 14/11/2006 12:38

sorry, just to reiterate.... a bit of roasted courgette is never going to pacify a baby hungry for milk. the food is just for playing with at the moment, really and truly. if some is going in, great, but milk is the food still.

Original poster
LaDiDaDi · 14/11/2006 16:04

Oh it's ok Aitch, I know that the roast courgette wouldn't really pacify her hunger ! I suppose what I mean is that sometimes just the playing with it keeps her happy for a bit iyswim.

I do usually give her banana for breakfast but we needed to do a fruit and veg shop yesterday hence the puree stuff.

I'm not sure if she likes toast or not, she sucks at it a bit then drops it, much like everything else that I give her!

Grandma is menu planning for Friday when she is going to look after her all day as a rehearsal for my return to work in Jan and also so that I can get some Christmas shopping done.

OP posts:
AitchTwoOh · 14/11/2006 18:44

also i should say thta the only thing that dd has allowed to pass her lips today is some mushrooms and some beef from a beef stroganoff. nothing else, not from breakfast and lunch. she's teething and i find it completely puts her off eating, especially something scratchy like toast. so you might find softer things better if you think your baby might also be cutting a tooth.