When I brought my boy home at 8 weeks, I'd read all the new puppy advice and was assured he'd sleep for 20 hours a day - what a joke that was, he slept less than us!
We didn't get a crate, partly because I'd read so much contradictory advice, and mainly because we didn't have the space or money for the large size crate we'd have needed. We are lucky in our situation (I'm a home student and care for my partner, so someone is always home, but at 19 months Mars doesn't seem fussed at being left alone for short periods, or with a relative for a few hours). I understand crates are a necessity for people with different situations. We gave him free roam of our one-bedroom bungalow from the start (and the garden in summer) and kept everything out of reach for a few months. A few slippers, cushions and skirting boards got chewed but that phase passed. When the back door is left open he still brings sticks inside to chew, but I'm not very houseproud so just sweep it up.
When he was tiny and we got overwhelmed and exhausted by his crazy antics we sometimes shut him in the kitchen just to grab half an hour of sanity. He cried and scratched at the door and we felt bad because, for a little while, he was wary of entering the kitchen in case I shut the door on him. But that passed and we haven't had to do that for over a year.
I'm not sure if we followed the right path by giving him free roam but for the last nine months he's been a good boy 80% of the time. We're not fully there yet - his recall is ok but I only let him off-lead in enclosed spaces. He's gentle and friendly with other dogs but when he gets over-excited he forgets everything he's learned. My main problem at the moment is lead-ragging when he gets excited by certain triggers on walks, it's pretty extreme, embarrassing and a little scary when he doesn't listen to me. But overall it got so much easier over time, particularly after the first 4 months or so.
If I could change one thing I would have been less indulgent with treats and attention when he was young. I wouldn't be too stingy - any good behaviour can be rewarded - but I think puppy needs to know these are rewards, and not think he'll probably end up getting treats however he behaves. Maybe our boy just isn't very good orientated, or it's our fault for spoiling him, but treats only have a limited appeal - he much prefers the excitement of meeting people and dogs. He flunked out of puppy club because he just wanted to play while all the other pups did whatever they were told for treats!
Concerning whining, I think it's important to look at overall body language to ascertain whether there's a fear issue, an unmet need or possibly even physical discomfort. There are some good online guides for body language. Our boy is quite vocal - he cries while wagging his tail if he brings me a toy to play but I'm busy studying. He whines at the back door if he spots a squirrel and wants to chase it. He sometimes whines and does the "sulky" pose when he decides it's walkies time. I'm training myself to ignore whining, so long as I think it's attention seeking and not a genuine unmet need.
Anyway, sorry about the long message! For anybody with the "puppy blues", don't feel guilty for feeling this way - the early months are exhausting and often don't feel very rewarding. Although I broke a lot of the "rules" (e.g. free roam of the house, rewarding negative behaviours through exasperation) and suffered a lot of disillusionment early on, I wouldn't change much of it at all. Our boy makes us laugh every single day, and we still sometimes can't believe how cute he is. He can misbehave but he makes up for it with loyalty, love and laughs.